Wide Awake
by Xaphrin
Summary: Raven is sent into a coma as her body comes of age. When she wakes up, she finds her world has changed drastically. Robin has turned into something dark, and the only person she can trust to help her is Red X. Action, romance, and a love triange ensue.
1. Prologue

**Wide Awake  
**_Prologue _

I TRAP MYSELF IN IDIOMS  
WITH THE BATTLES RAGING IN MY HEAD  
I CANT TELL IF I'M FALLIN IN  
OR IF IM JUST CLIMBIN UP AGAIN  
- _Wide Awake,_ Kenna

)O(

The first thing Raven became aware of was the darkness. It was all-encompassing. Even though her eyes were unable to open, she could feel it. It was thick and soupy, but unusually warm and comfortable. As if she'd never had a home outside of darkness. It was _known._ It touched her skin and threaded through her body until it felt that _she_ was made of darkness. That it was who she was and what she was.

Dark.

Raven wasn't sure if she was floating, lying, or standing up. She didn't know which way she faced or if it even mattered. There was nothing around her. None of her friends, none of her enemies. There was nothing.

_What is it you long for?_

Raven listened. She didn't hear words, but the thought shimmered in her mind. It poked at her deepest, darkest thoughts hoping for a reaction. Raven kept her mind clear and silent.

Nothing. I long for nothing.

Silence followed for a few minutes before: _What is it you desire?_

Nothing.

The words came again, more persistent: _What do you wish for?_

Nothing.

Complete silence followed, and Raven thought for one tiny second that she had passed the test.

_Fail. Not accepting your human side is what has brought you here. Refusing to accept your desires has brought you weakness. If you do not wish to remain here, answer honestly. I will ask you one more time. What do you long for?_

Raven was determined to keep her mind from wandering into the forbidden places she kept secret. Demons hid there she didn't know how to fight. But her body betrayed her, and for half a second, the image flashed into her mind. A tall, lean body nimbly moving through obstacles and taking down enemies. A smile stern, but brilliant, and masked eyes that raised more questions than answers. Raven tried to squash the thought, but it was too late.

_You long for a human. _It wasn't condescending, but inquisitive. As if this were a funny joke.

Raven swallowed hard, trying to keep her heart from slamming against her ribs.

A human.

_Humans are weak. They are fickle and manipulative. They are not your kind. _

The darkness grew thicker, like a malignant cancer. Raven felt it wrap around her arms, tugging at her legs, the ends of her hair. It pulled and yanked, stretching her skin and muscle in every direction. Her body felt on fire, confused and distraught under the pressure. Ligaments popped and moved and sinew was pulled from bone. Raven breathed deeply, removing her mind from her body. She could feel the pain but she did not register it. It would not be a factor.

_You long for what you cannot be_.

A human.

_What you desire is… _

A human.

)O(

Robin stood there, over her limp body watching her chest heave up and down. Her uniform was pristine, clean and undamaged from the fight raging on around her. Robin blinked, and his staff dropped to the ground with an odd clattering sound. He couldn't move.

Raven just collapsed. She had been standing there, magic gathering at her finger tips, ready to fight along side her teammates, and then… nothing. Her eyes glazed over and she fell into a heap of blue and black. Robin could barely get out her name as he reached out to snag her wilted body.

She slipped through his grasp and fell to the floor, plum-colored hair spilling out onto the pavement like a pool of purple blood. Beast Boy yelled out something unintelligible, Cyborg snapped something rude, and Starfire dropped Red X, who landed with an undignified heap on the floor. He grunted in anger, and Robin saw him skitter away. But he couldn't find the energy to chase after him. It was just Red X, he would turn up again.

Robin jumped from the crates he stood on and went to Raven, gathering her frail body into his arms and cradling her against his chest. He could feel the soft, steady heartbeat pump softly against him. Her skin was unusually pale, and her long lashes looked like black crescents against her cheek.

"Raven?" Her name came out at strained whisper. "Raven?"

"Dude… is she okay?" Beast Boy pressed a hand to her shoulder, but she didn't move. There was just the steady intake of breath.

"Is friend Raven…" Starfire's words hung unspoken, like a guillotine blade, waiting to drop. Robin silenced Starfire with a frown, and the word stayed silent. He turned back to the small body in his arms. The beautiful girl he'd grown to understand and love as a sister. What had happened to her? What was wrong? She breathed, her heart pumped blood… but her body had become lifeless and still.

"Let's take her back to the tower. We'll figure something out there."

)O(

_I cannot take credit for this idea. AT ALL. This idea was borrowed from __**Nightingale**_**, **_by XSilvaStarX, who in her graciousness let me use the idea for my own story. If you want to read the original, check it out, it's a great story line and I recommend it. Thank you so much, and leave a review so I know if I should carry this onward and upward._


	2. St James Infirmary Blues

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter One: St. James Infirmary Blues_

Well folks, I'm goin' down to St. James Infirmary,  
See my little baby there;  
She's stretched out on a long, white table,  
Well she looks so good, so calm, so fair_.  
-_ _St. James Infirmary Blues,_ White Stripes

)O(

Red X didn't know what made him follow the stupid Titans. He liked to think it was just curiosity. In all honesty, he shouldn't have cared, he got what he wanted from his latest heist, and the rest of the world be damned. But watching Robin react the way he did made something in Red X twist. It was like he was watching an unavoidable car crash and he couldn't turn away. Glass shattered and metal twisted into unintelligible heaps, but the sight was so compelling that he just wanted to sit and stare.

The stupid band of Titans were gathered around a bed in the medical ward, all eyes glued to the half demon sleeping in the crisp, white sheets. Her plum colored hair fell across her fair skin, making her look pale and sickly. Her breath came in long, even inhales, but there was no other sign of life. No movement of limbs or snarky words escaping her lips.

She appeared nothing less than dead.

"What's wrong with her?" The alien spoke first, wide eyes blinking in shock. She looked at Cyborg before letting her gaze fall back into the medical bed. She picked up the demon's hand, and held it against her face. "She's so cold. Does she have a case of flagstorn?"

"I don't think so, Star." Sigh. "As far as I can tell, she's in a coma. Or something like that… her brain is incredibly active. Like there's something going on we don't know about." Cyborg stood next to her bed, watching the monitors peak up and down, displaying numbers and notes on her brain activity, blood pressure, and heart rate. He tapped the tube going into her arm, the liquid continued to drip at its steady, unhurried pace. "Whatever is happening inside her mind is brutal."

Red X blinked, his eyes staring at the tiny frame bundled in the bed. Something in him was struck to life, like a match against stone, and he knew that whatever was going on right now was important. It was something that wouldn't affect just the Titans, but him as well. He knew he should stay in the shadows outside the window and watch. It didn't matter the consequences.

"So, we don't have an answer as to why she just… _collapsed_?" Robin's voice was low in his throat, angry and raw. Red X grinned with delight at the noise. Perfect little Boy Wonder was irritated, and that made Red X _very_ happy. There was something fun about rubbing his fur the wrong way, even if it was at someone Raven's expense. Robin raked a hand through his hair, nearly yanking out handfuls of ebony. "She's just lying there, half-dead because… why?"

"Dude, I told you, I don't know." Cyborg held up his hands in defense, it didn't seem to help Robin's scowl any. Cyborg sighed again. "Look, all I just know is that her mind is literally rejecting consciousness. Her brain does not want to be awake for whatever she's experiencing. Right now, she's either in a coma, or the deepest sleep I've ever seen." He sighed and pushed a few strands of hair out of her face. He looked at her the same way a brother would look at his little sister, and a sigh escaped his lips. "C'mon little demoness, you gotta let us know what's going on."

"That doesn't help us, Cy. We need answers." Robin gripped the metal guards around the bed with surprising force. Red X watched, wondering what would break first, the bed or Robin's hands. He was hoping for the latter. Robin glared at Cyborg, his eyes dark with frustration. "We need to find out what's going on inside Raven, this team isn't the same without her and she's a vital part of our lives. We need to fix this problem _now_."

A vital part of just the team or for Robin? Red X's curiosity piqued. He'd never really seen Robin so… _angry._ He looked feral almost.

"I don't _have_ answers, Robin. I've just got her healthy, that's all I know. I know I can keep her alive and well, what more do you want?" Cyborg waived his hands at the monitors, rejecting Robin's tone of urgency. "Stop jumping down my throat because I can't bend to your every whim. Accept that until we have the resources to see into her brain, we can't do much more than keep her alive. It's unfortunate but it's the truth."

"That isn't enough. I need answers!" Robin grabbed a scalpel from a near-by stand and threw it at the wall, letting it embed in the drywall. Silence webbed through the room, twisting around the Titans until it was a noose around everyone's neck.

Red X felt the grin peel across his lips again. This little family drama was starting to get interesting! Robin worked up into a tizzy because Raven wasn't there with him. Because she wasn't bending to his every whim? He absently wondered how Starfire would react if she knew the truth. Were Raven and Robin stealing moments of adultery in secluded areas or were Robin's emotions unrequited? Red X shifted on his perch to get a better look at their shocked faces. Now, if only he had brought popcorn…

"Did you think to check her room?" Robin snapped, teeth gnashing at his companions. There was a loud snap as ivory came together in anger. Starfire frowned and took a step back from Raven's lifeless body, her hands going to her heart in surprise. Robin continued on his tirade, refusing to acknowledge the frightened looks on his friends' faces. "There has to be something in her room, something that can explain this? Does she keep a journal? What about her books, or her mirror?"

Raven's room? Red X tilted his head to the side in question. He hadn't ever really thought about what interesting goods could be hiding in the dark corners of Raven's room. He was sure there _had_ to be all kinds of valuable goods in there. And what was this Mirror? Now, _that_ sounded interesting!

"Dude. If you think I'm going to come within ten feet of that mirror, you've got to be kidding me." Beast Boy held up his hands and took a few steps backward. "I refuse any contact with whoever touches that freaky thing again. I'm _still_ recovering from the last time I picked it up."

"Well, you're gonna have to get over your fear, Beast Boy, because someone has to go into the mirror to see what's going on." Robin pulled off his gloves and cape and threw them to the floor in frustration. Everyone's gaze turned to the floor, no one wanted to take the task, and that irritated Robin even more. "We need to find it, regardless of how you feel."

"That's what you say… hmph." Beast Boy crossed his arms over his chest and started to sulk like a child. Of course. That was Beast Boy's way of being even more obnoxious than usual. Robin started to go into one of his well-memorized speeches about integrity, and Red X started to lose interest in the soap opera in front of him. Especially if Boy Wonder was going to spout off his analogies. Yawn.

However… Red X's eyes shot northward to where he knew Raven's room to be. Hmm… this mirror sounded pretty interesting. Why did they need to consult it to save Raven? Was it a Magic Mirror? He smirked at the thought of Raven, standing in front of a mirror: "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most evil of them all?" The dark little princess, of course. Red X shrugged to himself, might as well take a look at it. Couldn't hurt, could it?

He started up a steel I-beam in the wall, knowing that Raven's room was two windows up and three to the left. He'd taken a peek in there once or twice, just to see how demons lived, at the time it was pretty boring. He just hoped the security system was turned off.

The window slid open without effort or noise.

Ha. Stupid Titans. Red X started to look around her room. It was too dark for his tastes, with deep colors, weird statues, and gothic paintings everywhere. In fact, he was almost positive there was something creepy bumping around in the chest at the end of her bed. It shuddered slightly at his arrival, but kept mostly quiet. Red X prayed this mirror wasn't in there. Clouds slid away from the moon, and the pale light caught the edge of an intricate, silver frame.

Ah. The elusive Mirror.

Red X picked it up and admired the finely crafted detail. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion. It was _heavy_, much too heavy for silver. Red X ran his finger over the back. Too bright for steel… platinum. He let his jaw drop as he came to a stunning realization. The whole damned thing was made of pure platinum. As he looked closer, there was a perfect ruby the side of a small golf ball inlaid at the bottom of the handle, amethyst and sapphires were placed perfectly in the shape of a raven in flight on the back. This thing was worth a freaking fortune. If Red X pawned this off on the black market, there would be no need to him to steal again. He could live happily for the rest of his life. He felt a grin come to his face.

This was perfect. He stashed the mirror in the pouch with his latest heist and slid out the still open window. As he descended the building, he could still hear Robin talking to the other team members. Actually, it was now climbing to a strange, strangled yelling. His words were rough, dark, and angry. They ripped from his throat like small knives, attacking his companions. From the corner of his eye, Red X could see the shocked and slightly concerned expression of Starfire's face. Something in Red X twisted again, and he got the strange feeling as if he should jump in and save her.

Pft. What did he care? He had a fortune sitting in his hands right now. That alien could fend for her own, she had super strength on her side. Red X didn't give it another thought as he jumped into the cool waters of the bay, attempting to swim across them. It turned out to be rather difficult with the incredible weight of the mirror attached to him. He grumbled in annoyance, but continued onward. After all, the thing was worth more than a few extra strokes.

Ah, land. Red X peeled off his suit once he had crossed the bay and stored it in the trick back seat of his black Lamborghini. His beautiful little baby. He had recently traded in the adolescent motorcycle for something more… masculine. Something that didn't scream "Angsty Teenager Aboard! Look Out!" Well, that, and he sure did love the purr of the Italian engine as he whipped through the streets. There was something incredibly seductive about speed. It tingled all the way through his spine and into his toes.

Red X slid in behind the wheel, the leather smelling fresh and musky. He started off a side street, hoping to shake off any suspicious eyes, before he pulled onto the main road. It was still packed with late-night shoppers and club-goers dressed in nearly nothing. Loud techno and bright yellow lights spilled into the street, making Red X wonder if he had time to stop and join in the fun. He glanced at the clock. Nah. It was getting late, and Red X had to find a buyer for the mirror before the Titans figured out he took it.

A gurgling scream pierced his ears, and Red X nearly drove his precious darling into oncoming traffic. What in the hell was that? He took a deep breath and looked around for the origin of the sound, but there was nothing that should have given him suspicion. Whatever. It must have been a drunken party girl.

Another few minutes of silence before he pulled into his parking ramp. He couldn't help but let his mind wander back to the fortune in his bag. What would he buy with all that money… a Ferrari? In sweet Ferrari red? The thought made him purr with delight.

Then he heard it again.

The same tone, the same notes that shrieked and cried out in agony. Red X pulled the car into his spot and sat there for a minute, his heart pounding against his ribs. What was it? What could have made some one scream like that? It was as if all the fear and pain in the world ripped from a young woman's throat, spilling into the air like a pool of warm blood.

Red X stared at the black bag next to him. Could it be…? He reached into the pouch and pulled out the mirror. There, displayed against the smooth glass, was a frightening image he wished he could have wiped from his mind. It was Raven, surrounded by darkness, being torn apart and dismembered. Her hair was pulled and yanked, clothes were pulled from her body, and long, raw marks kept showing up on her torso.

"Raven."

The scream came again, chilling Red X to the bone.

What _was_ this?

)O(

Robin threw a chair onto the floor, uncaring that the expensive wood cracked under the force. Where was her mirror? He had spent the whole night ripping her room apart looking for any sign of her mirror. There was nothing. Not even an indication of there ever having_ been_ a mirror. The room was filled with dusty tomes and objects that had no English word, but no mirror.

Early morning sun was spilling in through the window and Robin wanted to rip the golden orb from the sky and crush it into pieces. He didn't know why he was angry. He couldn't bring his heart stillness, and it thrummed with delight as the adrenaline coursed through him. Rage. He hadn't felt the delightful effects of rage in years. There was something satisfying about it, something… empowering. Seeing the look of compliance on his teammates' faces as he yelled last night… it felt good.

Robin needed to stop those thoughts, but they kept coming, like the evils of Pandora's Box had just spilled into him.

Raven was gone, lost to her own mind. What did it matter now? She would have been the only one to stop him from enjoying his rage. The only one who could have tied his emotions back into neat little knots. But she was laying half-dead in the medical ward, and there was no one else to stop him. No one to give him answers. No one to stop the burning warmth that followed his fingers on everything he touched.

Robin shook his head. This isn't what he wanted. He was a Titan, honorable to the end. He stood for justice and all things good and righteous….

… but still there was a little whisper of delight at the sight of chaos. A dark strip of lightning that pierced his soul at the sight of bringing down an enemy with force.

It felt… good.

)O(

_Sorry, this was so short. And a little disjointed. I promise it will all start to come together in the next chapter. Leave a review, let me know how you feel!_


	3. Death Letter

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Two: Death Letter _

I got a letter this morning  
What do you reckon it read?  
It said the gal you love is dead  
-_Death Letter,_ White Stripes

)O(

Red X didn't know what brought him back to Titan Tower. Hell, he wasn't even sure if he remembered going to the tower. He'd managed to keep away from this blasted place for almost two weeks, and that fact alone made him proud. What he had seen in Raven's mirror had plagued him with nightmares every single night, until he dreamt he was falling into oblivion with her, darkness drowning him. He woke up in a cold sweat, seeing bloodied images flash across his eyes and shake his bones until he could convince himself he was awake.

She tortured him, and he doubted she knew it.

The only thing he knew was that right now he now stood at the end of Raven's bed, staring down at her small frame like it was the most foreign thing he had ever seen. She looked tiny, bundled in thick, white blankets. Her face was pale, plain, ordinary, and she appeared almost peaceful, like she was dreaming sweet things… or as sweet as Raven could get. Red X watched her breathe in and out, slow and steady, as if nothing in her life had changed and she was just sleeping.

"What is wrong with you, Bird? What's wrong with you?"

Perhaps, and Red X never wanted to admit it, there was some tiny part of him that was anxious. He didn't like to play "the hero", hell, he barely liked playing "the concerned friend". Raven was his enemy, the girl who stopped every one of his heists with her stupid black magic. The girl whose apathy was damn near obnoxious. The girl who shunned everything that was normal. She was on the wrong side of his spectrum… and yet… did he care?

"What are you doing?" The soft, musical notes came from the door, and Red X cursed himself for being so careless. Of course the Titans would have come back often to check on her. They wouldn't have left her unguarded as they captured Cinderblock. Red X turned and looked at the red head standing in the light from the hallway. She blinked a few times before taking another step in the room. "What are you doing here? What are doing to friend Raven?"

Red X tensed. Starfire had a fantastic "Shoot First, Ask Questions Later" attitude, and he often found himself on the receiving end of it. Her starbolts had a weird, tingling after effect that he didn't like to be reminded of. Red X held up his hands and took a few steps away from Raven. "I was just curious where the Little Bird went. Haven't seen her in a while." He gave a one-shouldered shrug, as if this whole mess didn't concern him. "Just thought I'd stop by and see for myself… I'll be going now."

Starfire cocked her head to the side, an expression of both confusion and understanding weaved across it. She blinked some more. "Where the… little bird has gone…?" She shook her head, red tendrils of hair curling around her face and accentuating the sad, forlorn look in her eyes. She looked like someone had just ripped out her heart and smashed it on the floor, and Red X felt just a little sorry for her. "We do not know where she has gone, but it is not here."

Red X didn't take another step. He stood perfectly still and watched her. It wasn't that he didn't trust her, it was just that he'd been tricked before. And it usually ended in some painful situation. But, Starfire didn't appear to be tricking him. There were no sparks of green energy gathering at her fingertips, no creepy glow to her eyes. She looked… _devoid_ was the best way he could describe it. It was as if she had nothing left in her and she was hollow inside. "Are you okay?"

Starfire shrugged, but the nonchalance didn't fool him. She still looked empty, like a shell. "Perhaps… well, as well as to be expected after loosing my best friend." She walked to the edge of Raven's bed and pushed hair out of her face. "There are not many of the 'warm, fuzzy feelings' lately, perhaps I miss them?" The question seemed more for herself than Red X. "I do not know."

"Why aren't you out there with the rest of the Titans?" Red X still hadn't moved, and Starfire's proximity was making him nervous. He watched her fingertips, waiting for the gathering of energy, still feeling like he was going to be tricked at any moment.

She shrugged, but it wasn't a movement of nonchalance, it was as if she had just… given up. Like she just didn't have the energy to be concerned anymore. Her green eyes looked up into his, a small frown on her lips. "I suppose I do not have any thing left. I've lost my best friend and… I'm…" She stopped herself and looked away. "You do not need to know everything that goes on here, Red X."

"No. I guess I don't." Red X shifted his weight and watched her for a few more minutes. He was used to silence, used to the gentle quiet that weaved through a room, but this was _different_. It was as if he was standing in a morgue and all the stories and leftover emotions muffled the sound, like there was no where for it to travel. "That would ruin all my fun."

Starfire snorted as if she found him funny by default. She glanced up at him before weaving her fingers through Raven's. The strange, muffling silence came again and hung between them for a while before Starfire spoke. "Have you come to steal more of Robin or Cyborg's technology?"

"No." Red X crossed his arms over his chest. "I really did come to see the little bird."

"Ah." Pause. "And are you staying for a while?"

"No." He glanced at the clock hanging on the wall. "I've got a job later tonight."

"In Jump?" Starfire glanced up at him, but there wasn't any indication that she was going to tattle. Red X stared at her for a long minute before deciding to answer.

"No. In Steel. I've got to leave soon."

"Mmm." Starfire glanced up at him and gave a long, exasperated sigh. She was more than tired with her situation, she was worn to the bone. Her skin was pale and sallow, and her eyes were listless. It looked like she had just _given up_. "Do not think I will stop you, Red X. I have neither the reason nor the energy." She held up her hand and concentrated, a few feeble sparks of energy popped out, but nothing more than a cheap sparkler. "I have nothing left to fight with, and I am condemned to watch my friend never wake up."

Red X felt something in him clash. He should have been excited at the idea the powerful alien was… well, _powerless_. He should have felt relived that the annoying team was down two members, and the two strongest to boot. But, in fact, he was sorry for her. There was something so sad about what she had become. She _was_ empty. He glanced down at Raven and then back at Starfire. "Are you okay?"

Starfire gave a half-hearted shrug. "Perhaps." She looked down at Raven and sighed again. Her sorrow seemed to fill what little space was left in the room. "I may need to return home for a while… we will see." She looked over at the clock, then at Red X. "Will you be coming again?"

"Might. Depends on how often I can get in." He let the question hang between them.

"The rest of the team is going out for the pizza pie tomorrow." Her eyes met his and she blinked. "If you decide to visit friend Raven, I will not join them. That decision is up to you."

Red X's initial reaction was to take her up on the offer, but he couldn't bring himself to agree. If there was anything this girl needed, it was to be with her friends. Not watching her Raven's vitals blip up and down on a monitor. He shook his head. "Next time the other three are out, I'll drop by."

"The next time they are fighting?"

"Yes." Red X glanced one more time at the clock. He had to get going, Steel City was almost three hours away and the job started soon. He gave Starfire a jerky wave and moved closer to the window. "I'll be here the next time the others are out. You promise to let me in?"

"There isn't much I can do to stop you." Starfire's lips turned down and her eyes followed him for a minute. She took a long breath, letting it out slowly before speaking. "You have her mirror, don't you?"

Red X's finger tips paused on top of the smooth glass. He watched the city lights below, trying to remember that he belonged on the streets doing what he did, not standing in this tower, chatting with his enemy. He took a slow breath before turning to face the redhead. He cocked his head to one side and regarded her cautiously. "Maybe… if I did, how would you know?"

Starfire's face betrayed no emotion and she watched him squirm. This girl didn't need powers to be intimidating. "I wouldn't… I just guessed…" She blinked once before continuing. "Should you happen across it, I should warn you… that mirror is a portal into her mind. Whatever you see in there is happening to Raven. It's imperative to remember that." Starfire stroked Raven's hand, breaking her gaze from Red X. "Just in case you find it."

Red X swallowed hard and stared down at Raven. _That_ was happening to her? In her mind? What he witnessed two weeks ago… that was plaguing her? It was like she was being tortured from the inside, unable to cry out for help, unable to beg for mercy. She was forced to endure that for how long? His breath caught in his chest and he walked to her side. "Little bird…" He managed a glance up at Starfire. "Should I tell you what I saw?"

"If you think it would help." Starfire said, frowning. "But I think it may be best that I do not know you have it… it would anger Robin."

"Torture." Red X said, ignoring Starfire's warning. He kept watching Raven's calm face, knowing the terrible secret it held. Knowing that underneath her pale, alabaster skin she was being ripped apart by some unseen force. Red X hated knowing that she was alone in there, hated knowing that he was forced to sit on the outside and watch. "She's being tortured inside her own mind… There's something inside her that's tearing her mind apart." Red X tried to keep his breathing normal, he didn't want to be frightened any more. "Is… is there anything we can do to help?"

"No." Starfire whispered, her words tangled with fear and sadness. "She is alone in there." She cocked her head to one side and watched him stroke hair away from Raven's face. The strange silence filled the room before Starfire could continue to speak. "Do you think you can help her?"

Red X looked up and frowned. He pulled his hands away from Raven as if he'd been burned. He couldn't afford emotions like this right now. He wasn't in the business of saving anyone, let alone _Raven_. "I don't know. I just don't like seeing _anyone_ like the way Raven is now. She doesn't deserve this and she didn't ask for it. So, why her? Why now?"

"There is a lot about Raven that is a… mystery. She is many things we do not understand, and perhaps that is good… but it is also very bad." Starfire heaved a long sigh. "There have been times when I know there is nothing I can do to help her. All I want is to be a good friend… but I am stuck here." She stared at her own hands, as if willing them to shoot sparks, but nothing happened. "I am useless."

"You are here at least." Red X forced a humorless chuckle, the sound foreign. "That's more than I can say for the Bird Brain. Where is he anyway, off building nests?" At the comment, Starfire's face paled and she made a noise somewhere between shock and anger. Red X stopped talked and raised an eyebrow. What, exactly, was bothering her? Especially with Bird Brain? He held up his hands in defense. "I was only joking."

"It is not good to joke about things you do not understand." Starfire frowned and shook her head. "It is getting late, you should go."

Red X took the hint, and he started for the window without another word. For a moment he wondered exactly what was happening behind the closed doors at the Tower. What about Robin would have made Starfire react the way she did? Come to think about it… he really hadn't heard much about the masked wonder boy in a few weeks, it was as if he had slipped into obscurity. But then again, Robin was never one for normalcy.

Whatever, it didn't concern him. He had a job to do.

)O(

Robin pressed his hands against the wall, feeling his breath catch in his lungs like steel hooks. He had nearly… _no_. He couldn't think about that now, not with darkness lining his vision, not with crimson pumping heavily through his veins… he couldn't think about what he had nearly done to Cinderblock. What he had nearly done to his friends… Robin tried to calm down, tried to remember what he stood for.

But the darkness was warm.

And he wanted it.

)O(

_I'm not sure exactly who the final couple will be in this, it could be Robin and Raven, it could be Red X and Raven, hell, it could even be Red X and Robin. I don't know, I'm just going with the flow. Also, I know this chapter was… odd… to say the least. It's going somewhere I promise! So, leave a review and let me know what you think of it so far. Also, the new chapter of __**Honeythief**__ should be out soon._


	4. You Have no Faith in Medicine

**Wide Awake**

_Chapter Three: You Have No Faith in Medicine_

Is there a way to find the cure for this implanted in a pill  
It's just the name upon the bottle, which determines if it will  
Is the problem you're allergic to a well familiar name?  
Do you have a problem with this one if the results are the same?  
- _Girl, You Have no Faith in Medicine,_ The White Stripes

)O(

Robin sat in an alley way, his head resting against a rough, brick wall. The stench of city rain fell on him as he stared at his uniform, shocked by what he saw. There was blood staining its bright colors and Robin couldn't remember where it came from or even if it was his. Over his head, high energy techno pumped from a rave and spilled from the open window several stories up to pooled around his feet. His head was killing him, and his left arm felt dislocated.

The night was a blur of colors and emotions. He remembered getting into a fight with some punks trying to rob a convenience store, but that was nearly four hours ago. He pressed a hand to his head, trying to remember. What had happened between now and then? He heard angry yelling echo in his memory. Twisted and foul. Underneath the sharp vowels he could hear his own voice whisper to him, telling him to stop. Had he…? Sirens sounded in the distance, but Robin didn't have any desire to chase them, he barely acknowledged them.

He struggled to his feet, feeling his ankles give underneath his weight. He toppled back into the wall, but managed to hold himself upright. He was going to be fine, or that was what he kept telling himself. Now, he just needed to get back to the tower, he needed to check in on Raven. She was more important to him than he believed.

Before this whole debacle, she was his companion, his best friend, and his teammate. They were close to each other. But he was realizing she was more than just "close". She grounded him, even in her current state. She kept his own darkness at bay, chained and locked inside his heart. But, the longer she was gone the harder it became to hold on to normalcy. To sanity. His grip slipped every time he looked down at her pale face, lying motionless in the hospital bed.

"You look a little worse for wear."

The tinny voice sounded above him, and Robin stilled as he looked up into the rusty metal of a fire escape, only to see a caricature of a skull staring back at him. Red X. His stomach turned to lead and Robin tried to snarl at him, but the anger didn't quite reach him inside. There was nothing but empty darkness, and that scared him. "What's it to _you_?"

"Nothing." Red X shrugged and dropped down to the pavement, spinning a diamond the size of a golf ball around his fingers. There was a long, awkward moment as Robin felt Red X's gaze follow him through the alley. "I just never expected to see the great and powerful leader of the Titans hanging out with city rats and garbage. Everything okay, Wonder Boy?"

"Fine." Robin bit out as he felt fire rise into his chest. His neck would be so easy to snap, the bones were delicate and frail. Just the smallest amount of pressure and he would be dead and Robin would be free of him forever. The thought made him ill, in a strange and delightful way. Robin tried to quarantine his thoughts and turned away. He gritted his teeth and took a step back, running into a garbage can. The high pitched scrape hurt his ears and Robin cringed in response. "I'm fine. What are you doing here so late?"

"Late? The night is young my friend." Red X laughed as he continued to play with his catch. The diamond was perfect, and clear catching every particle of light and reflecting it into a thousand colorful beams on the filthy pavement. "Besides, what do I normally do with my life at four o'clock in the morning?"

"Steal jewels and hearts alike?" Robin snarled again and he slid along the wall until there was another foot of space between them. His abdomen twisted in pain and he had the sudden urge to empty his stomach. Robin coughed and managed a few lung-fulls of air before he responded. "Don't you have anything better to do?"

"Nah. Not really. I just saw you making friends with garbage cans and thought I'd come see if you were all right. Call me nice like that." Red X finally put away the precious stone. There was another moment of silence as Red X watched Robin slide along the brick wall towards the exit. Robin bit back another snarl and paused as Red X cocked his head to the side. Robin could feel his curious gaze following his every movement, and his defenses went into overdrive. "You… okay, Wonder Boy?"

"Fine."

"Ah. Yes. I think a blood-soaked uniform and a schizophrenic attitude is pretty normal for you." Red X jumped back up the fire escape, barely making a sound. Robin stared at him as Red X leaned against the railing and watched him shrink to the opening of the alleyway. Robin was almost free. Just a few more steps and he could have pretended this exchange never happened. "Where are the others…? I haven't seen the Little Bird in a while."

Robin stopped, his fingers digging into the brick. He turned up to him and growled low in his throat. The question hit dead-center on his heart. Who was _he_ to question his team? Who was _he_, a _thief_, to think that he was somehow privy to his personal life? Robin jumped onto the fire escape, and Red X took a surprised step back, running into the ladder. Good. Keep him pinned. Robin pressed his face close to the mask, flashing a row of bright teeth shinning like fangs in the dingy light. "Why do you ask?"

Red X jumped up the ladder, balancing on one of the middle rungs. He wrapped his arms around the side poles and stared down at Robin like a condescending gargoyle perched on the corner of a church. There was a moment of precarious silence before he replied. "Curious, I guess. I almost miss her and her snide apathy."

"Didn't think you cared." Robin's fingers tightened around a bird-a-rang to the point of bruising. It would take a flick of his wrist, just the tiniest amount of movement, and this conversation would be over. Red X would never speak again, and Robin wouldn't have to be reminded of Raven's current state. "I'll relay the message to her."

"Glad to know." Red X jumped up to the next landing. He stared down at Robin, and for a moment the leader could feel him frowning at him, judging him. Red X gave a half hearted shrug and moved to the ladder. "Well, it's been nice running into you, Wonder Boy. But I've got a winning ticket to cash in on." Without another word or sound, Red X was gone. Robin stood there, feeling the blade of his weapon start to slice through his gloves. He needed to use it, needed to find an outlet. Robin fell to his knees, clutching his head.

He couldn't think like this! He couldn't be… whatever he was now. He'd spent his entire existence trying to do good, trying to uphold everything his parents and his benefactor had taught him. But losing Raven had broken him into so many pieces, that he wasn't sure where all the shards were. His sanity, he knew, was falling out of his grasp and disappearing into the darkness, but he had no idea how to save it. He could protect everyone else in the world, keep them safe from harm. But two people slipped from his fingers, Raven and himself.

Robin stared at the empty street. All the way to the west, dim lights glowed from Titan tower. It was like a beacon of goodness and justice rising out of the sea, some kind of twisted ivory tower. His stomach churned as he turned away from the familiar structure. This decision was for him, no one else. He couldn't rely on anyone else anymore. Robin dropped down to the pavement and stared at his slashed glove. A few drops of blood spilled out and splashed into the putrid puddles at his feet. Robin pulled off his gloves and his cape, and threw them into one of the trash cans. There they would stay.

He stepped onto the street, but he didn't head west or even east. Instead he turned south, where no one would find him.

)O(

Red X stared at Starfire with suspicion growing in his chest. She'd been silent this visit. She wasn't normally Chatty Cathy, he didn't expect that out of her, but she usually talked about memories with Raven, or how the team was coping with their loss. Every now and then he would have to sit through a ragged retelling of one of Beast Boy's _awfu_l jokes. But today, there was nothing. Not even a peep of "hello". This wasn't the first time though, the whole week she'd been silent, thinking about something only she knew.

Red X glanced down at Raven's lifeless form, trying to remember how long she'd been like this… it was almost a season now. Three months. Winter had just whispered the first white dust across the city, and colorful lights were being hung in almost every window. If he strained his ears, he could hear the echo of bright Christmas carols being pumped from the shopping district across the bay. It seemed like forever had passed since the first day he found her mirror. His nights were peppered with shrieks of terror and pain. Sometimes he heard her weeping in agony. Strangely, the silver frame had been silent since Sunday, the same day as the alien in front of him. He wondered if they were connected in some way.

Starfire sniffled, as if she'd been crying. Red X sighed and began to wonder why he was still here, why he still looked after Raven. She shouldn't have been any of his concern, but there was still some part of him that did good things, no matter how asinine they may seem. He glanced over at Starfire, who was pressing a tissue to her nose. Poor girl. She spent all day and night next to her friend's bed, confused, hurt, and unable to understand what was happening to Raven. Although Red X wasn't much better, he could be out wooing young, beautiful women and instead he was staring at a comatose demon with an emotional wreck of an alien crying next to him.

He needed to break the silence before he went insane. He needed some semblance of normalcy. "So… Christmas is a month away." Red X didn't know what made him choose that topic. He hated Christmas, hated talking about it, hated thinking about it, hated the idea of it. But, Christmas seemed a neutral enough, something to keep Starfire's mind in the present. "Are you getting together with the Titans East again?"

Starfire frowned. Finally, a reaction. "How did you know about that?"

"Word travels." The truth was, that Red X had spied on that party last year, out of curiosity of what superheroes did for holidays. It was an experience he wanted to forget. Putting it simply: Beast Boy plus eggnog did not equal a pleasant outcome. Red X leaned back in his chair, trying to read her expression, but her face was hidden by a curtain of fire-red hair. He frowned at the continued silence, time to provoke her some more. "I also heard a very funny story about you and Aqualad caught under the mistletoe."

"Mm." Her face flared pink for a few seconds, but she stayed silent.

"Starfire, sitting around and moping isn't going to fix anything." Red X crossed his arms over his chest and stared at her. Anger flashed across her features and she glared at him, but he just shrugged it off. At least she was responsive. "Raven would be mad at you for mourning her loss."

"I am not mourning _her_ loss." For a moment, he was a glitter of green appeared at her fingertips. Starbolts. Oh shit, he'd made her _really_ angry. Red X jumped up and took a step back as she rose to her feet. "You should not speak of things you do not understand, Red X. There is a lot that goes on behind closed doors that is none of your… your _damn_ business."

Red X threw his hands up in defense and stepped away from energy gathering around her. "Don't be angry, I'm just saying that moping around here isn't going to fix everything… Raven would want you to be happy, enjoy the world you live in now, not wait for her return." He glanced down at Raven, whose only response was the steady intake of breath. Something didn't seem right and he looked back at Starfire, who nearly had smoke coming out of her ears. "You are never this angry, Starfire, what's wrong? What happened?"

"Nothing." Starfire frowned and the sparks at her fingertips dissipated. She let out a short sob and sniffled before the waterworks started. Damnit. Now he was obligated to comfort her and Red X hadn't comforted anyone in years. He patted her shoulder with uncomfortable awkwardness and muttered some stock phrase like "it's going to be all right." What did he know? He wasn't even sure what made the alien cry. Hell, ten seconds ago he wasn't even sure aliens _could_ cry. Starfire let out another sob and threw herself into his arms. This day was just getting better and better. "This is just terrible."

Red X rolled his eyes behind his mask. "That's for sure." He stared down at her head, buried in his chest, shaking with her tears. A little piece of goodness rose up inside him and it took every effort to squash it. Let's not get carried away now, Starfire was sweet enough, but Red X didn't comfort anyone, no matter how distraught. He tried to pull his arms free, but her alien strength (even powerless) kept him bound. "Starfire, pull yourself together. Everything isn't _terrible_… I don't even know what you're crying about."

"Robin is _gone_!" She sobbed again, squeezing Red X to the point where he was almost sure he heard a rib or two snap. She was going to puncture a lung if he wasn't careful. "He's been gone all week and it's terrible! No one can find him! He didn't say anything to any one of us and I don't know what to do! I feel like…" Starfire took a slow, shaky breath as her grip on Red X loosened, and he managed to grab a breath of air. "I feel like everything is disintegrating around me." She let Red X go and took a step back, her face red with embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Red X, I didn't mean to overreact it's just… well, you're the closest thing I have to a friend right now."

Shit. Red X cringed at the word "friend". His curiosity had captured him in the lion's den of goodness and justice and all that "golden rule" crap. Now, Starfire was clinging to him like a small child, and all he wanted to do was find out what was happening to Raven. Stupid curiosity. How did this happen to him? _How_? "Look, Starfire… I'm flattered you think we're close and all… but what about Beast Boy and Cyborg? They're your friends too. I'm sure they would understand how you feel and why… but I'm just a thief."

"They are… angry, upset that Robin left us when we need him the most…" Starfire glanced back at Raven, frowning at the sight. "Raven held us together. We all played a very vital part of our group, and with one of us gone… we fall apart. Robin was becoming something different without Raven, something we didn't understand. I lost my powers. Cyborg turned bitter… it happened because one of us went missing. Because we lost without warning." Starfire's voice had dropped to a low whisper and she returned to her seat.

Red X knew that speech wasn't for him, it was for her. She was talking out her feelings, her misunderstandings, and her loss. Starfire was trying to make sense out of this seemingly senseless event. Raven was gone, and everything Starfire knew and understood to be solid and unchanging, had changed. Her best friend had left her, her leader had left her, and now her teammates were closing in on themselves. It was a wonder Starfire didn't break down herself.

"I'm confused and frustrated, and the few people I counted on to make sense of everything… are gone. Raven is locked inside her own mind, and Robin has disappeared. Where else do I have to go?" Starfire sighed and stood up again, this time going to the open window. She stared into the stars. "I'm going home."

Red X blinked at the statement, shocked. She couldn't go home, that would defeat the whole purpose of being a _team_. But he felt her resolve, and knew there wasn't a whole lot he could do to stop her. He could at least try. Red X walked over to where she stood and took her hand. "Starfire, you are home. You're friends are here. Raven will pull through this and every one will go find Robin and you'll be back together again like nothing happened." Oh, gross. This sickly-sweet sugar coating was making Red X sick to his stomach. She better appreciate everything he did for her.

"I am returning to Tamaran." Starfire blinked a few times, staring at Red X's masked face.

He didn't know what to say to her. What _was_ there to say? That he was sorry for her loss? What kind of cheap bullshit was that? For a brief moment he wondered if he should relay the encounter he had with Robin some nights ago. That dark, deranged look in Robin's eyes. As if he had seen or done things he wanted to forget. Red X tried to push the memory from his thoughts, Starfire didn't need to be reminded of him or what he could have become. Red X shifted his weight and shook his head. "And is this what you think is best?"

"I will not be gone forever, I love this world too much." Starfire frowned and fidgeted with her hair for a moment. Red X could see the war inside her, as if she was regretting the decision she just made. He watched her, refusing to say anything, he was pretty sure she was one wrong word away from another monsoon of tears. "I just need to… recollect myself? To remember what I am here for. To remember that this will pass. Here, surrounded by broken friendships and loose ends, it is hard to remember what I need."

Red X cocked his head to the side. For being such a ditz, this girl was damned smart. "So, you're going back home to your planet?" She nodded, her eyes solemn. "When are you leaving? And what happens if Raven wakes up, looking for her best friend, only to find herself friendless and leaderless?" Ugh, this righteous talk was making him ill. He needed to crawl inside a whiskey bottle with a couple of women to wash the stench off him.

Starfire looked at him blankly, as if he had just asked a silly question. Oh no. Not good. He got a strange, sinking feeling in his stomach even before she spoke. "She is not friendless, Red X. You have been here just as much as I have, watching over Raven. She will wake up and you will help her put our team back together. Are you not her friend as well?"

There was a moment of cold shock before anger rose up into his chest and Red X started for the window, his escape route. How dare she put this weight on his shoulders? How dare she make him feel like he was supposed to be _good_? He was a thief, rotten to the core and proud of it. Nothing, not even a red-headed alien with innocence abound, would save him. He pointed a finger at her. "Don't you dare do this, Starfire. I came here out of curiosity. Out of pity. I didn't come with some grandiose ideas of saving my enemies and switching sides. I am a thief first and foremost." He swung one leg over the edge of the window, readying for escape.

"Then why do you keep coming back? Your curiosity was fulfilled that first night." Starfire frowned, but made no other indication of her feelings. "You didn't have to come back. You didn't have to sit here and mourn her loss with me. But you did, and I took that as a sign of friendship."

"You were mistaken, Starfire." Red X growled low in his throat and swung the other leg out the window. "Go home. I couldn't care less if I tried." And he let himself fall back to earth, pretending not to hear the angry sob erupting from her mouth. Let her cry, he was a thief with money for blood. He was just curious, and he'd gotten his fix. Let her leave and wallow in her self-doubt. Tomorrow he would get up, sell that stupid mirror, and be done with the whole debacle.

But that tomorrow never came.

)O(

_So, there it is, Chapter Three. Sorry, it too so long to get out. I was wrestling with how to proceed from the last chapter. I hope you enjoyed it and let me know how you feel about it. And, as always, a huge THANK YOU to everyone who reviewed, but especially to __**XSlivaStarX**__ who was kind enough to let me twist her story, _**Nightingale**_**.**__ I feel like I'm just not doing it justice. _

_With love always: Xaph!_


	5. Scream

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Four: Scream_

You scream,  
But there's no body to hear,  
It doesn't matter,  
It's only you and me and all of your fears.  
- _Scream,_ Boa

The first thing Raven became aware of was the air. It was still and sterile, and the acrid scent of cleanliness burned the inside of her nose and lungs. She felt her body covered in cheap, thin sheets that scratched at her skin. The lights were dim and there was a soft hum over her shoulder. Her left arm hurt, as if it had been dislocated and swollen to twice its size. She knew she was in the medical ward, but how long had she been here? Where were the others?

Raven pried her eyes open, and hissed in pain when the light stabbed at them. She blinked a few times, adjusting to the world around her. There were two chairs on either side of her bed, and one of them was close to the window. So, someone had to have been here. But that didn't answer how long she'd… Raven's thought train skidded to a halt. It was snowing. When she had last been awake the team was still enjoying the last few dregs of summer. She remembered that later that evening the team was going to drive to a suburb just outside of Jump to go to a double-feature at a drive-in. Had they still gone? When did she…?

Shards of pain splintered Raven's memories and she held her hand to her head, trying to keep herself from crying. What was going on? Her whole world had been turned upside down for who knows how long, and she was waking up in the medical ward cold and alone. Where were her friends? Where was Starfire? Or Robin? If she knew anything, it's that Starfire would have been at her side from dawn until dusk. Raven glanced down at her left arm, and yanked the IV tube out. Her arm _was_ swollen to twice its size and she was pretty sure that the vein had collapsed a few days ago.

"Starfire!" Raven tried to yell, but it came out as a husky, angry whisper. "Starfire… damnit." Raven struggled with her blankets, pulling them off her legs. There was a moment as she fought with her body before realizing she couldn't move. Her muscles had forgotten how to function. No. This was not happening. Raven _refused_ to let it happen. She ripped the rest of the wires and tubes off her body before doing something drastic, she rolled over and let herself fall out of bed.

The shock rippled through her body and a screeching alarm disturbed the stillness of the room. Raven winced, both from her impact and the noise. She was sure there was going to be a huge bruise on her hip in a few hours. The alarm continued to sound, and it was giving Raven a headache. At least someone would know she was here. Minutes passed as Raven lay on the cold, dirty floor, willing her limbs to move. Half an hour. She watched the hands of the clock spin slowly around the face. An hour. They were probably out fighting. Give it some more time, someone would show. They wouldn't abandon her. Would they?

It was another hour before the noise became too much and Raven managed to pull the wires out of the wall. Silence followed. They weren't here yet. Maybe they were needed in Steel? It wouldn't be uncommon; the team was often called to Steel City to help the Titans East. In that case, Raven would be on her own until they returned. She rolled on to her back and stared up at the ceiling, trying to at least will herself to sit up. It took almost half an hour, and several failed attempts at grasping the bed before she managed a sitting position. Where were her powers? What had happened to them? Further more, what had happened to her?

A few tears leaked out of Raven's eyes as she finally saw the calendar, hidden by the door. Days were marked off by little, black Xs. Today was December 2nd, and Raven had been in that damned hospital bed for three months. Three months. She couldn't remember what had happened to her while she was under the layers of her coma, and now she was sitting alone on the floor of the medical ward barely able to move and completely powerless. Raven pushed some of her greasy hair from her face, trying to be calm about the situation, but it was too late, frustration, sadness, anger, and desolation had already taken root. So Raven did the only thing that seemed normal:

She cried.

Raven let loose long, hard sobs that echoed like melancholy bells in the emptiness of the room. She didn't know how long she sat there, just crying. Her fingers fisted in her hair, trying to make sense of what happened to her, but there was nothing. No one came to her rescue, there was no knight on a white horse, just Raven alone, dirty, and confused. She tried to grasp on fragments of memories, but they moved just out of her reach, keeping Raven in darkness once more.

"Plan…" Raven whispered to herself, trying to squash a hic-up. She needed a plan, something that set out easily executable actions. Some thing that was relatively normal so she didn't lose her mind. "I need… I need to get to my room and bathe." That was normal. Basic. Raven grasped the top of the bed and pulled with all her might, she managed to move her feet under her. Now the real test, would her legs be able to support her weight? Raven tumbled back to the floor with a curse. She tried a second time, and her legs managed to remember how to hold weight, although they were shaky and weak.

Raven managed to make it from the medical ward to the elevator, and her legs only gave out once. She tried not to think about how weak she was, tried not to think about how she had no memories from the past three months, and tried not to think about how she was completely powerless. She tried to keep her mind a blank slate, just get to her room and bathe. The elevator lifted her to her floor and she stumbled drunkenly down the hall, leaning against the wall for support. Her room was closer than she remembered and Raven felt her heart skip a beat as she saw her name written across the door.

"I got to my room… now, bathe." It took Raven a few times to remember her code, but the door finally hissed open. She felt tears prick her eyes again. Her room was trashed. Her bed covers lay on the floor, her favorite chair had been destroyed, her books were torn from her shelves, and everything looked _broken_. She stumbled to her desk and stared into the open drawers. Her mirror. She needed her mirror, it would help her remember what had happened in her mind. She picked her way through the discarded sheets of her poetry, the broken wood, the shattered glass. She fell to the floor and rifled through her bed sheets. Empty. Her mirror was no where.

Raven let loose another sob and she heaved herself onto her empty bed, curling into a ball. What had _happened_? Their last mission had been routine, basic. It was Red X running away with some jewel or technology, Raven couldn't remember which, and then… blackness. And the next thing she remembered was the stagnant smell of the medical ward. Raven pulled a pillow underneath her head and felt something crinkle in the case. She fished inside and found a small note, written in Starfire's very childish handwriting.

_Raven, if this finds you, I know things are not what they used to be. It is different with you gone. Robin is missing, I have returned home to collect myself, and Cyborg and Beast Boy were hurt with Robin's leaving. I am not sure where they have been lately. _Raven tried not to sob. So, there was no excuse for her loneliness. All her friends, her teammates just left. Leaving Raven, who was broken, confused, and memory-less alone in the tower. She glanced back down at the letter to finish reading. _Do not feel sadness at this. There is still hope. I will return by the second day of February if you are awake before then, look for Red X. Although he claims his indifference, he is your friend. He has spent nearly every night by your side, watching you heal. He will be able to help you find the others and bring them together. Trust me. _

Trust Starfire? The girl who drank mustard? Trust her with the fact that she just steered Raven into the hands of a very _wanted_ criminal? Raven crumpled the letter and threw it against the wall. What in every level of the nine hells had just _happened_? She was incapacitated for three months and her world had completely disintegrated into _nothingness_? Her leader had "gone missing" which, in Starfire-speak, usually meant that Robin had run away from a problem he wasn't sure how to deal with. Criminals he understood, puzzles, weapons, and a whole slew of other things that were "logical". Robin didn't know how to deal with loss, with a mystery, he didn't know how to deal with Raven.

She rolled onto her back and stared at her ceiling. If she stared at the zenith for long enough, she forgot that her room was in complete disarray, that the quiet in the tower was unnatural, and that the snow outside her window had always been there. For a few precious moments, she was able to believe that nothing had changed and everything stayed the same. Robin was in the training room, Starfire was watching Beast Boy and Cyborg play videogames, and Raven was enjoying a few moments of peace in her bedroom. But it was all just shadows of memories, and the truth was brutal.

Trust Starfire. What other options were there?

Raven forced herself into a sitting position, her body sore with the forced activity on it. She was tired, but she didn't want to stay in this broken symbol of what was once here. And that was more important that sleep. Raven stumbled to the bathroom and turned the shower on. She tried not to think about the dust on the tiles, otherwise it would bring more tears to her eyes. Raven leaned against the shower wall and let the hot water spill over her body. It felt good, normal.

Raven bit back a shred of angry laughter. What in her life was normal _now_? Everyone had left her to just _exist_ in a hospital bed. Starfire had gone home, Robin shirked away from his job, and hell only knew where Cyborg and Beast Boy were. The only person she knew she could turn to was _Red X_? What kind of weird, twisted Karma was that? Raven stood in the shower until she had completely emptied the hot water tank and the water turned cold. She stepped out, careful not to slip on her floor, she still didn't trust her legs.

Raven walked to her closet and pulled out her underwear, and then rifled around for her uniform. She frowned. Her uniform would be completely useless in an attack. It was thin, flexible material that she had brought from Azarath. But right now she was powerless, and bullets and knives would rip through it like nothing if she didn't have her barrier. Raven rubbed her forehead and dug deeper into her closet, near the back where she kept her one formal dress. A black bag stared at her. It had been designed by Cyborg to keep her safe, and she never had a chance to use it, now seemed as good a time as any.

Cyborg, in his quest for everything _new_, had created some form of extremely flexible Kevlar. Raven had gotten careless during a bank robbery, and was nearly shot in the shoulder. There had been angry words from Cyborg (and Robin, now that she thought about it) about how she needed stronger clothing if she was going to fight the way she was. Raven had said that she had her powers, and that was good enough for her. But Cyborg created it anyway; wouldn't he be happy to see her wearing it now?

Raven struggled into the high-necked cat suit, and it made a funny squeaking noise against her clean skin. Her limbs felt as though they were made of lead _and_ she was swimming through molasses. She stared at herself in her mirror and frowned. Why did she feel like this was more revealing than her other uniform? She tugged at her stomach and tried to loosen it, but it stayed snug and held everything in place. Scowling, Raven turned away from the mirror and started for her door, grabbing her cloak as she left. She forced herself back down the hall and into the elevator.

It felt like forever before the doors opened to the garage. Raven knew it was a long-shot, but she still prayed for the smooth, sleek lines of the T-car. Her heart sunk into her stomach at the empty space. No T-car. That left two options: 1) she would have to go on foot, and her body felt like it was going to collapse any minute, or 2) she could borrow one of Robin's cycles. She stared at the small collection of motorcycles. Two red R-cycles, and one sleek, black one that Robin used for "running errands". Raven forced back a groan of disappointment and tried not to curse his name as she climbed atop the black one.

Flying was her preferred method of transportation, this… this was death on two wheels.

And she was cursing the world as she flew down the pavement.

)O(

Red X leaned back against his chair as he deleted spam from his inbox. The snow outside his window stifled the normal sounds of cars and drunken couples, and the silence was unnerving. He tried not to let his mind wander back to Starfire and all the terrible things he said to her, but something still made him think. Some part of him, however small, was sorry for being so cruel, but there was another part of him that just didn't give a damn. She should have known that he was nothing more than a thief and there wasn't a single thing in this world that was going to change that. Especially not something that was as petty and expendable as _friendship_. He didn't need friends, all they did was lie and stab you in the back. He didn't need Starfire. He didn't even need his curiosity, he just needed jobs.

Red X heard a shuffling noise outside his front door and he picked up his head, listening to the familiar cadence of footsteps. Messenger. Red X threw on his "extra" mask, a plain red one that just covered his eyes, and leaned further back in his chair so he could see the messenger enter from the hall. A knock sounded. "Come in, Todd. Door's open."

The door creaked open and there was a young, scraggly looking kid standing in the bright light that filtered from the hall. Red X always stifled a snort at the sight; the kid looked more like a lost puppy than a messenger. He had forgotten how old he was… fifteen? Maybe fourteen. It didn't really matter. The kid got him work and kept his mouth shut, and Red X's apartment hadn't been discovered yet. That was all he needed. "What've you got for me today?"

"Two offers." Todd put the plain, white envelopes on the coffee table. Red X walked into his living room and opened the letters. One for a microchip in France, and one for another jewel heist in New York. Pft, New York drove him nuts, but there was an advance payment. That was enough reason for him. He pulled his wallet out and handed the kid a few hundred dollar bills. Todd looked at them and shook his head. "I… I think I've been tailed this time, X. There was a black motorcycle following me from Main street."

Red X frowned. Todd was _always_ careful, he'd been working for Red X for almost three years now. Not once, in those three years, had Todd ever been unable to shake a tail. Red X ran his finer through his hair. "All the way from Main?"

"I tried to lose them, but they were pretty persistent." Todd's shoulder slumped and he looked deflated. Red X felt a little sorry for the kid. He didn't do anything wrong, it had just been a bad day at work. "I'm sorry, X. I messed up. I just didn't know where else to go. I couldn't lead them home."

"No, I wouldn't want that." Red X sighed. He liked this apartment too, damn it. Now, he was going to have to move. "It's fine, Todd. I'll get out of here tonight and I'll catch up to you in a few days, okay? Lie low for a while, and here." Red X handed him his normal fee and a little extra. "To get you through the week. Be safe, okay?"

Todd nodded and headed for the hallway. Red X watched him go, still frowning. That kid better stay alive, he didn't want to try and find another messenger. Red X started for his suit, trying to add up the time it would take for someone to tail Todd and get up to his apartment. He figured he had about ten minutes, fifteen max. Another knock came from his door. Damn it, what was it now? Todd _always_ listened to him. He was going to get himself hurt if he stayed any longer. Red X threw open the door.

Two violet eyes glared up at him.

Red X's heart fell into his stomach. "Shit."

"That pretty much sums it up." Red X stared down at the petite woman. Her fingers gripped the door frame tightly and her lips turned down in a frown. Red X tried to say something, but Raven got there first. "I need to know why I got a letter from _Starfire_ telling me to _find you_." She pushed past him into his apartment and flopped down on his sofa. Red X stared at her for a minute, watching the way she trembled. She was _exhausted_. Her whole body looked as though it were two steps away from collapsing, but her eyes were burning with a fire that scared him. Raven pursed her lips. "_Why?_"

"I don't know." Red X closed the door and leaned against the wall, continuing to watch her. She tried to look strong, but her anger didn't quite permeate the room. There was no usual thrum of power as her emotions took root, there was nothing. Just a small, pale woman sitting in a villain's apartment. Red X blinked and pushed himself into a standing position. "Let me guess. You were the one tailing my messenger?"

"Mm." Raven's head fell onto the back of the sofa and she made a strange, guttural noise. Red X took that as a "yes" and stomped over to his liquor cabinet. He was going to need a stiff drink if he had to carry on a conversation with a Titan in his own home. Raven turned her head and stared at him, she sighed. "I'm sorry I came here, Red X. But I didn't know what else to _do_. I wake up from a three month beauty sleep in an empty tower with no best friend, no leader, not even _Beast Boy_, and all I've got is a letter from Starfire telling me to look for _you_." She rubbed her forehead. "At what point should I lose my mind?"

Red X took out two glasses and filled them with scotch and ice. "Now, would be my best bet." He sat next to Raven and handed her a glass. "You're going to need this."

"Thanks." Raven took a sip and then pressed the cool glass to her forehead. There was a long moment of silence, and Raven continued to drink the brutal liquid. Red X tried not to snort. This girl had a major problem if she was downing scotch the way she was. She finally turned to him. "What happened to me, and how did _you_ find out?"

"Curiosity." Red X leaned back into the sofa and stared out the window for a minute. He tried to curse Starfire for meddling, but this was his own damn fault. If he hadn't been so damn curious, if her mirror hadn't called to him, if Raven's shrieks hadn't haunted him every night of the week. Too many "ifs" to blame on anyone but himself. The least he could do is pretend to be chivalrous. "I saw you pass out in a warehouse and I got interested. So, I hung out with Starfire watching over you."

Raven snorted. "Whatever for?"

Red X shrugged. "I told you, curiosity."

Raven took the last sip out of her glass and stared at the ice cubes. Red X was waiting for them to set on fire or something, but Raven just continued to stare. "I wasn't under the impression that 'hanging out' was allowed in the villain-superhero relationship."

Red X rolled his eyes. "Look, I didn't mean anything by it. I was just curious."

"I don't care what you meant by it, I just want some fucking answers." Raven turned to him and for a moment Red X felt his heart stop. God damn it, she looked scary. He pulled back a little as she continued. "I've got _nothing_, Red X. I've lost three months of my life, my best friend, my team leader, and my…" Raven's passionate speech stopped abruptly. "Well, that's none of your damn business. The only thing I have is a letter telling me to trust you, written by a girl who thinks _mustard_ is a drink."

Red X blinked. "Mustard?"

"It's gross and I don't want to think about it." Raven stared out the window. Silence enfolded them and Red X found he couldn't take his eyes off her. She looked dejected, lost, confused and other emotions that he never equated with _Raven_. The girl who could kill you with a look. The girl who didn't need anything in her life but books… well, that one was a lie. Raven apparently needed her friends. She needed something solid to cling to, and right now she had nothing.

Red X didn't know why he even cared, but for some reason he did. What had Starfire turned him into?

"This was stupid. I don't know why I trusted that letter." She stood up and Red X noticed the handgun strapped to her thigh. Since when did _Raven_ pack heat? She was powerful enough of her own accord, what did she need weapons for? And why did the sight kind of turn him on? Raven turned and glared at his wandering eyes, and Red X's gaze jumped back to her scowling face. "I'm going home."

"Wait." Red X chased her to the door. Damn it. _What_ in the world was he doing? Why was he stopping her? He should have let her go. He should have pretended to not care. Those were safe things. Things that kept him at a distance and as far away from the Titans as possible. He should have done a lot of intelligent things, but instead he did something stupid. "You… you don't remember what happened at all?"

Raven frowned again and stared at him. There was a glint of suspicion in her eyes. "What do you know?"

"Not as much as you think." Red X moved to block her exit. Oh god, he was so stupid. What was he _doing_?

"Tell me."

"I… it's a long story. You might want to sit down." Red X grabbed her arm and pushed her back into the sofa. He felt her eyes follow him as he grabbed the scotch. Why was he doing this? He needed to run out of here as soon as he got a chance, but instead he was going to tell her _everything_? Even though he was sure to get in trouble? He was so _stupid_. He was going to be dead or in jail by tomorrow morning. "Here, have another." Red X topped off her glass and sat down. "I'll tell you what I know, but you have to hand over your handgun. I don't know if I trust you with it."

"Do you want the revolver I have at my hip too?" Raven raised an eyebrow, silently chastising him for not being adept enough to notice the other gun. Red X felt his stomach clench hotly as she removed the weapons. What the hell was wrong with him? He was so sick. Frowning, more at himself than at her, he put the guns behind him on an end table. Raven took another sip of the scotch.

"What do you have the weapons for?"

"Nope." Raven glared at him and leaned back into his sofa. "I'll answer when you tell me what you know."

Smart girl. He took a deep breath, trying to remind himself that this was okay, and that he wasn't going to die tonight. There had better be _some _god looking out for him after all the kindness he was giving her. "Here's what I've seen and what Starfire told me. I know that you collapsed mid-fight, we were somewhere down near Pier 9, and I followed the team back to your tower. Robin was _angry_. I've never seen him so angry before, and _I_ stole his damn suit. He went off on Starfire for a few minutes, then Cyborg and Beast Boy. I got bored, so I went and stole your mirror." Red X could see her face burn a furious red and he rolled his eyes. "It's a pure platinum mirror covered in precious gemstones, I'm a thief and your friends left it unguarded. What did you think I would do?"

"I don't care if you're a thief." Raven slammed her glass down and glared. "That's a window into my mind. It's not some bauble you can steal. I need that for meditation or my powers go haywire."

"I know. Starfire told me. Besides, you were in a freaking coma."

"That doesn't give you the right to steal my things!"

"Do you want me to continue or not?"

"I want the truth."

"You're getting it, so shut up." Red X could see her fingers itch to hit him. He _was _being an asshole. "I left for a week and came back to see you." He shrugged at her incredulous expression. "I told you, I was curious. Starfire found me and we talked about the team and about you. So, I started to come and see you more."

Raven nearly choked on her drink. "Whatever for?"

"I was _curious_." He rolled his eyes again and continued. "Starfire… lost her powers. More than that, Starfire lost herself. The team started to drift away without you. Wonder Boy became… something else. I only saw him once in these three months, and that was a week ago. He felt… _different_." Red X ran his fingers through his hair. "Look, I want to keep myself out of this family drama as much as possible. I'm only telling you what I know because I'm nice." Raven snorted, but Red X chose not to respond. That would just egg her on and give her more verbal ammunition. "I know that _whatever_ Robin was, it was dark and it was uncontrollable. He lost it without you, Raven."

"Mm." Raven looked down into her empty glass, her expression unreadable. For a moment, Red X wondered why he didn't tell her what he saw in the mirror. He wondered why he kept that information from her, even thought he was sure it would have helped her remember something important. And the truth was, he was a little curious as to _why_ Raven was tortured for three months straight. Raven blinked up at him, startling Red X from his thoughts. "Do you know where he went?"

"No."

"Do you have my mirror?"

"…"

Raven frowned and held out her hand. "Give it to me."

"Fine." He went into his bedroom and pulled the velvet bag from his top drawer. He handed it to her, frowning at his loss. All that money in his hands. Why didn't he just get rid of it when he had the chance? "It's yours anyway."

Raven pulled the mirror out of the bag and ran her fingers over the carvings, as if she were appreciating it for the first time. She turned it over and stared into the smooth, silver glass. Red X watched her from the doorway, waiting for something violent to happen. But nothing came. Raven stared for almost an hour, and the only thing she saw was her reflection. And then, she snapped.

Raven cursed loudly in several languages and threw the mirror at the door. The sound of the impact was deafening, and a few splinters of wood flew off, scattering across the floor. The mirror tumbled to the ground, undamaged. But Raven wasn't. "What the fuck is going on!" Raven threw a sofa pillow at the mirror, lying on the floor and screamed. She kept screaming until Red X through his neighbor was going to call the police. "Fine! Have that stupid thing, I don't give a fuck any more. You can do whatever the damn well you please with it!"

Red X wasn't sure if the alcohol was getting to her or if she actually just _snapped_. He took a few steps closer, trying to think of a way to placate her. But she was a raging fire at this point, and Red X didn't think he had enough water. He reached out and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Raven."

"What do you want, Red X? Because I'm at my _fucking wits end_." He'd never heard anyone swear so much in his life, and Red X took a step back. Maybe calming her wasn't such a good idea. "I've got _nothing_. I'm confused as hell, I have no leader, no friends, _no powers_, and I can't even get into my own goddamned mind. What in the hell am I supposed to do? I'm sitting in your apartment with _nothing_." And then it happened:

She cried.

Red X winced. Damn it. How in hell was he supposed to deal with this? Anger and sour words he could handle, but someone as strong and indestructible as _Raven _bawling her eyes out. Raven collapsed onto the floor in a heap of violet and black and just cried. She clung to his floor and sobbed into his favorite area rug. Not that Red X blamed her, she had lost everything in a matter of months, and none of it had been her fault. He shook his head and sighed. What _exactly _was he doing? This was going to get him in trouble. He rubbed his forehead.

"Raven… calm down. Just… look…" Red X bent down and pulled her hood off her. Her hair tumbled out, but she refused to look up at him. "Calm down. I… You can stay here tonight and we'll figure this out in the morning."

Raven's watery eyes blinked up at him, shock lining her mouth. "We?"

Red X's stomach turned, what did he just promise? "I'll… help you this once."

"You never do anything for nothing." Suspicion entered her eyes and she backed away. "What's the price?"

"We'll figure that out later."

)O(

_So, there you go! I hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think and how you feel. If you like __**Wide Awake**__ please enjoy some of my other stories. _

_And, as always, thank you to __**XSilvaStarX **__for letting me borrow her idea. _

_With love always: Xaphrin!_


	6. Tigerlily

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Five: Tigerlilly_

But out communication is telepathy  
What you give is what you get out of us naturally  
And we can wait 'til the shadow grows long  
And turn the page of the story  
That has long since found a home  
- _Tigerlily, _La Roux

)O(

Red X leaned against the door frame as he stared at the Titan lying in his bed. She was wearing one of his white shirts and curled into a ball under several blankets, sleeping like a child did after crying themselves to sleep. Watching her lie in his bed made him want to start pounding his head against the wall. What was he _doing_? He was inviting the lion into his home, and for _what_? Because he'd been curious about what happened to her? Because watching the disintegration of the Titans had brought him some kind of sick pleasure, and he wanted to be a part of it? Because there was a part of him that was a _gentleman_? Ha! Red X rolled his eyes and headed into the kitchen.

This was completely out of line. If he could punch himself for being stupid, he would have. But here he was, stuck with a powerless Titan as a companion. When she had broken the news to him, Red X had felt safe… for a brief thirty seconds. But then he remembered that it was _Raven_ and being powerless didn't make her any less frightening. He got the distinct impression that if Raven packed _heat_, she knew how to use it and use it well. Not to mention that Robin had probably taught her how to kill someone with a ballpoint pen. And, there was no telling _when_ her powers or her memories would come back, and what would happen when they did.

This was a mess. A god-awful mess that he had gotten himself into and had no way to get out.

"Good afternoon."

Red X spun around and stared at the petite woman in his living room. She was rubbing her eyes, staring at him. Red X tried to keep his eyes locked on her face, but he found it was difficult in her current state of undress. As small as she was, her legs were long and shapely, and her womanly curves pressed invitingly against the thin material of the shirt. There was something… _comforting_ about seeing her in his clothes. Like it was _normal_. Red X shook his head and took a step back, needing more space than a room between them. Her beauty didn't make her any less deadly. "I thought you might sleep all day."

"I just woke up from a three month nap." Raven ran her fingers through her bed-head and yawned. "I'm done sleeping."

"Good to know I don't have a narcoleptic on my hands." Red X turned away from her, trying to forget the image of her barely covered body in his clothes. What was his _problem_? God, he was so sick. "Do you need something to eat?"

"Sure." He heard the sound of her retreating back to his room. Freedom. "I'm going to shower first."

"Fine." Red X turned and caught the sight of her leaving. For a moment, he thought he might die from the sight. Her round bottom peeked out from the hem of his shirt. What in the hell was that girl _doing_? And why was he reacting to it? She was as dangerous as a feral beast, and he was inviting her into his home. Furthermore, she was probably plotting a way to kill him right now. This was worse than _bad_, this was a disaster.

He heard the shower turn on and Red X sighed again. He was safe for a few more minutes. He began to look for ingredients to cook for the two of them, trying to figure out a way to get out of this. If he left now, he could go into hiding, runaway from this can of poisonous worms. But, she would find him. He didn't doubt that she would use every spell and every power she might have possessed in order to hunt him down and hold him to his end of the promise.

However, there could be serious perks to helping her regroup the team. Immunity for his next heist? Even a chance to peek inside the famed Titan vault? There were endless places his mind wandered to. But the real question was, did those perks out-weigh the danger he was flirting with? Red X ran his fingers through his hair and groaned. Damn Starfire for getting him into this mess. Damn the Titans. And damn his curiosity for ever getting involved.

Red X groaned. This was bad, so very very bad.

A few more minutes passed by and he heard the water shut off as Raven mumbled to herself. There was the strange sound of her trying to squeeze into the super tight cat suit, the one that showed off all her womanly curves. Oh god. Red X let his head fall into his hands. He was going to die and then he was going to burn in hell. And it was all because he was _curious_. What a freaking sap.

"Are you going to stand there and glare into the refrigerator all day, or do you need some help?"

Raven's monotone voice wafted from the doorway and he jumped. She walked over to the counter and stared at him, her eyes dull and lifeless, as if everything in her life was worthless. There was a long moment as they stared at each other, wanting both silence and conversation at the same time. He knew that she was holding on to her sanity by a thread, but how thin that thread was… he didn't know. She could snap at any time, and Red X knew he didn't want to be there when she did. He turned back to the fridge and rifled around in it, pretending he was looking for something. "Feel better?"

"Well enough."

"Mm…" The milk was expired. Figures. He turned back to Raven who had now taken to staring out the window. Her arms were crossed over her chest and she had one hip cocked to the side, emphasizing her hourglass figure. Her lips were turned down in a frown and her eyes traced the paths of snowflakes, still falling in the cold. The silence hung between them like a barrier, walling Red X away from any sort of normal conversation with Raven. This was quite a change from last night, when she had been clinging to the floor sobbing. Not that he blamed her, there was a lot that happened to her and she had to deal with it somehow. "Are you…" Red X stopped talking as she turned to him, eyes dull and lifeless.

"Am I what? Going to be okay?" She gave an inelegant snort and shook her head. "We'll see. It all depends on whether or not you hold up your end of the bargain."

"We still haven't decided on a form of payment."

Raven raised an eyebrow. "Payment." There was a long moment as she tasted the word on her lips, weighing its pungent flavor. She turned back to the snowfall, letting silence thread between them. Red X waited for her to say something; he'd be _damned _if she tried to play this off as some kind of act of charity. He was nice, but not that nice. Raven finally spoke. "And, what exactly did you have in mind?"

"I'm not sure…" Red X threw out a loaf of bred that was starting to turn green. Did it have to be so blatantly obvious that he was a lonely bachelor? "I haven't decided, but I've been thinking about it very carefully."

Raven gave a harsh bark of laughter. "I'm sure you have." She moved to the living room and sat down on the sofa. The corner of her lips turned up into a sad but curious smile. "And what have you considered?"

"Immunity."

"Ah." She rubbed the bridge of her nose, her smile slowly turning coy. "Forever?"

"If you're offering." He could see the seriousness in her eyes, a silent warning telling him to back off. He took the warning and turned away from her again, trying to find something edible and not expired in his fridge. There was a bottle of mustard and some pickles. Great. They might have to go out to eat now. "What else do you have in mind?"

"I'm not the one with the power to give you payment." Raven tilted her head to the side in question. "We're looking for him, remember?"

"So, I'm working for an IOU right now? Great." Red X shut the refrigerator door and turned to look at her, crossing his arms over his chest. The "lonely, lost Titan" look wasn't going to work on him forever. She needed to realize that this was a business transaction, not a hand-out. "I look out for myself first and foremost, and I don't do _anything_ for nothing. I need payment, a deposit of some kind. I'm not going to offer my services simply because you need it and you're pretty." He briefly noted the shade of red that covered her cheeks. "This is _business_ so don't read anymore into it. I'm not helping you one more step until I've got something of value."

Raven reached over to the coffee table where she had left the mirror last night. Several unreadable emotions swept across her face and a small sigh escaped her lips. After a moment of staring at the work of art, she extended her arm. "Take it. It's worth a small fortune and I have no need of a magick-less mirror."

Red X stared at the treasure, his heart thumping against his ribs. She was offering it to him, all that glorious money, wrapped inside pure platinum and precious gemstones. His fingers itched to hold it in his hands again, to use it for what he wanted. But the echoes of what it was had rooted too deeply in his mind. The screaming, the images of torture and gore. He glanced from the mirror to the owner, trying to forget that it was her he saw in its glass face just a few nights ago. Red X ran a hand through his hair, sighing. She had to present him with this dilemma, didn't she? "Are you sure this is what you want?"

Raven cocked an eyebrow. "Is there a reason I shouldn't offer this to you? It's just a mirror."

"It's yours." Red X started toward her, like a moth drawn to a flame. It called to him.

"It's useless now. I don't need it."

"I…" Red X frowned and took a step back. "I don't want it."

"You're lying." Raven put the mirror back down on the table. "You were bound and determined to keep it from me last night, and now you're pretending that it means nothing? What exactly do you _want_? I have nothing else to give but this and you're demanding payment, but refusing the thing you want the most." Raven let out a heavy, audible sigh and rubbed her temples vigorously. "You're going to give me a headache."

"I'm pretty sure that's part of my job."

Raven rolled her eyes and turned away from him. "So, I guess we're at an impasse now aren't we? You won't help me without some kind of deposit, and I have nothing to give you."

Red X let his eyes roam her face, and he felt the words slip out before he had a chance to stop them. Idiot. "Is that what you think?" He saw her eyes widen a little, and color flood her cheeks before she looked away. Goddamnit. He was freaking stupid. Now she was going to guard herself and he wouldn't get anywhere with her, on the mission or otherwise. He robbed his forehead a little, trying to ward off the headache that was forming. "Look, it's nothing personal…"

"But you just made it that way." Raven turned back to him, her cheeks were still flushed, but there was an undercurrent of anger flowing through her. Her eyes swept up to meet his, and Red X felt his heart shudder to a stop. She could look _dangerous_ when she wanted to, like she was on the warpath for his blood. "Keep your advancements to yourself, Red X. I want nothing to do with them, or you for than matter. Like you said, this is a business transaction. Nothing more."

"Fine." Red X crossed to the coffee table and snatched the heavy mirror into his hands. He turned it over and basked in the finery for a few moments before turning back to Raven. "Business then? I'll take your stupid mirror as a deposit until we can come to a final resolution on my payment. When we have an agreement, you'll get your mirror."

"Perfect." Raven stood and pressed her body close to his, so that they were just a few centimeters apart, and their energies cracked a sizzled between one another. Red X wondered why he didn't notice how _small_ she was, just a petite bundle of blue and black. For being so tiny she sure did pack a punch when she needed too, and he fought the urge to step back. "Then if you want your payment, I suggest we start looking for my leader now."

"Lets go." Red X turned away from her and started for the door. "Grab your cloak and we'll start now."

The ride was uncomfortable and awkward. Raven stared out the window, keeping silent, and Red X did the same. What was she _doing_ here? This was ridiculous. She was walking right into the most unconventional, improbable situation with her hands tied behind her back. She was putting all of her faith into _what_, a thief? A _wanted_ criminal? All because a letter from Starfire told her to? And in spite of the strong airs she exuded, in truth Raven had nothing to protect herself except for a few rusty moves that Robin had taught her months ago, and a revolver. This had gone beyond asking for trouble, this was walking right in on trouble's Sunday dinner and sitting at the table. And she got exactly what she asked for.

Raven knew that Red X saw things in her mirror, some hint or clue about what had happened to her these last three months. He had to have known _something_, his emotions were too wishy-washy when it came to her mirror, one minute he wanted it, the next he didn't. It was like a child who wanted a treat, but then realized it was poisoned. And yet he had kept quiet as to any events that transpired during her coma. What about his relationship with _Starfire_? Was Raven to believe that it was a friendship built out of curiosity? And further more, what was Starfire doing, letting a wanted criminal traipse through the tower like a guest? And why didn't Robin know? What _happened_ in her absence?

"Keep the doors locked." Red X's quiet and cold voice ripped her from her thoughts, and she looked around as the clean streets slowly faded into sludge and grime. "This isn't exactly the safest neighborhood in the city."

Raven stared at the boarded up buildings and cracked windows, hoodlums and gang members staking their claim on cracked stoops. She heard a catcall from a street corner as they passed. Red X seemed unconcerned as he turned again, taking them deeper into the broken brick jungle. Raven glanced over at him, frowning. "Where are you taking me?"

"The last place I saw Robin." Red X frowned back at her, and Raven fought the urge to rip his mask off. He was going to give her another headache. "I thought you wanted to find him."

"I do…" Raven fidgeted with the edge of her cloak, trying not to look nervous. "You saw him _here_?"

"Making friends with trash cans and street rats, if you must know." Red X pulled up next to a florist shop that looked like something out of _Little Shop of Horrors_. Grime covered the display windows, and the silk flowers had turned gray with age. Someone had written poorly spelled profanity in the dirt on the window. Raven followed him into the alley next to the shop, her nose wrinkling at the stench.

"It smells like they haven't picked up the trash."

"That's the west side." Red X shoved his hands into his pockets and leaned against a wall. Raven felt his eyes follow her as she inspected the alley. She wanted to turn around and punch him, but she wasn't sure why. It felt like every movement and every word was just grating on her nerves more and more. As if his curiosity was morphing into something else. Red X continued after another moment of silence. "I saw him here a week ago, coming back from a mission… he…" Red X stopped and gave a deep sigh.

Raven stopped moving through the ally and looked over at him, concern lining her eyes. What was so terrible that it was hard for him to talk about? What could have happened between them? She felt her heart jump into her throat as the worst scenarios ran through her head. Had he been severely injured? Had he made a bad decision? Or was it something worse?

"I won't lie to you, Raven, because you deserve better than that. Robin was _dark_. There was something in him that was unstable. Uncomfortable with the way things had turned out. It's like loosing you had broken something inside him, and no one knew how to fix it." Red X ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. "He was…"

"Ow!" A bright flash of heat raced through Raven's hand and she snatched her hand away from the brick wall. The air turned thick, and she stared at her hand before examining the wall. There was nothing sharp protruding from it, no wires or pipes that might have conducted electricity. Just a dirty brick wall.

"Ow?" Red X pushed himself to his feet. Raven could feel his curiosity wash over her, and for a brief moment she wondered if she was regaining her powers. "Is everything okay?"

"I… I'm not sure." Raven pressed her hand back to the brick, the heat was still there and raced up her arm and into her neck. It didn't burn this time, but felt warm, like she was dipping her arm into a jaccuzi. Her head began to swim and feel fuzzy, as if she was going to black-out. The world swam around her in waves of colors and sounds, until everything melted away at there was nothing but humming noise. The sounds were fuzzy, as if they were coming through a bad radio station. She heard conversations and whispers between women and their male clients, between drug dealers, drunken lovers, and… Robin. She heard his erratic heartbeat, the sound of his hoarse breath at the mention of her name. She tried to focus on the familiar cadence of his voice, but it kept slipping in and out. All she got was muffled syllables.

"He… he was here." Raven pulled her hand away, and suddenly felt exhausted. She slumped down onto the dirty pavement and sat there, staring a Red X. His mouth was turned down into a frown as he watched her, and Raven got the strangest feeling at the sight of it. Like she wanted to wipe it off his face. Raven pressed her hand against her chest and felt her heart beating rapidly against her ribs. What was that? She had never done that before in her life. It was as if she were seeing memories embedded into objects. Was this a new power?

"Are you alright?" Red X had taken Raven's hand and pulled her to her feet. His hands, were surprisingly warm and strong. And for a short moment she wondered what it would be like to be comforted by hands like that. Raven tried to frown at him, and then pushed his touch away. Red X didn't seem concerned and he continued to stare down at her.

"I felt… I heard…" Raven took a moment to gather her thoughts and put them together in a coherent sentence. This was new for her, and she didn't know how to explain exactly what was happening. Raven glanced over at Red X, who was still watching her intently, as if he expected her to burst into flames at any moment. "I… could hear the memories. It was like the wall absorbed the energy and kept it there. I could hear your conversation with him, but it was all static-y, like it was on a bad radio station." She rubbed her forehead. "It was odd."

"The wall kept the memories?" Red X sounded as if he were fighting not to laugh, and Raven glared at him. He didn't have to be so rude about it. At least she was making headway, what was _he_ doing? Being snarky. Red X took a step back and held up his hands for defense. "Look, I'm not questioning the fact that the wall is recording memories for you, I know better than to doubt your judgment. But you do have to admit that the idea is a little strange."

Raven tapped a finger tip against her lips and stared at the wall. "The concept is very strange. I've heard of it before in some of my books, but I never thought it actually existed. It's a very rare gift." She reached out and ran her fingertips against the wall. There was the strange warming sensation again, before the whispers started. Her mind blurred with noise as memories started to flood her mind. She tried to tune out everything else, and focus on just Robin and his emotions, but it was difficult. Even as a metaphysical recording, he was elusive. After a few minutes of trying, she managed to grab a few snippets of clear thoughts. _Bludhaven or Gotham_?

Raven gasped and pulled hand away from the wall, staring at the creases in her palm. "He's left the city."

"And gone where?" Red X was already starting for his car, dragging her along. Raven tried to pull at his grip, but he was a lot stronger that he looked, and she we powerless. She managed a glare at him. For being so damn adamant about not helping her out, he sure was rushing to find Robin. He wanted his payment quickly.

"There are two places he could have gone. I'm not sure which one he chose." Raven tried to tug at her arm again, but Red X just opened the door to his car and threw her in. She continued to glare at him as he walked to the passenger side and carefully got in. Pretentious jerk.

"Well then, let's start with the closest." Red X started the car and glanced over at her. "Right or left?"

"Right. We're going to Gotham."

)O(

_So there is chapter five. I apologize for the delay in getting my stories updated. I've recently had a tragedy in my family, my father passed away suddenly so I've been dealing with that. This chapter was almost finished before he went into the hospital so I managed to edit it a little and post it, but do not expect too much from me over holiday break. To quote "Speed Racer" – "I can hardly remember how I like my eggs, let alone if I wanted to keep [writing]." Thank you so much!_

_Oh, also, as you can see I've figured out the pairing: Red X and Raven (mostly friendship, but with a little sexual tension) for the majority of the story, but ultimately it will be Raven and Robin, and Red X and Starfire. At least that's where my mind is headed it could change again. Thank you again, and I hope to have the next chapter up as soon as I can. _

_With Love Always: Xaph!_


	7. Worst Day Since Yesterday

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Six: Worst Day Since Yesterday_

"Hell says hello, well it's time I should go  
To pastures green, that I've yet to see  
My wild calling, It's been the worst day since yesterday."  
_The Worst Day Since Yesterday_, Flogging Molly

)O(

Red X tried not to growl as he watched an old lady try to buy a pack of cigarettes with a bag of pennies. He was third in line behind a woman with two unruly children who were throwing gummy-worms at each other, and there was some biker behind him who smelled like he hadn't bathed since he bought his Harley in '78. Meanwhile, his baby sat unprotected next to the gas pump, open to onslaught from greasy fingers, prying eyes, and road salt. Why, oh _why_, hadn't he taken a more _reasonable_ car for the six hour trip to Gotham?

Of course Raven was no where to be found, she had said some very _choice_ words to him (a few of which he was sure was in her native tongue) before ducking into the bathroom the change into civilian clothes. She had been trying to avoid changing out of her uniform, but Red X had put up a valid argument of "blending in with the crowd". In response, she had put up her middle finger.

Red X shifted his weight before glancing at his watch for the hundredth time in the last ten minutes. They still had two more hours to go before they reached Gotham, and there was no telling what would happen when they got there. Right now they were just taking shots in the dark with Raven's new ability to find memories in objects. Would they be able to find Robin, and how would they manage to coax him out of his dark shell? Would seeing Raven be enough? Furthermore, was he even _there_?

The thought of running around in circles was enough to make him sick. He had always tried to be as no-nonsense as possible: get in, get the target, get out, get paid. The only exception to the rule was provoking the Titans, and _only _because he loved seeing that look of utter frustration on Robin's perfect little face. All this detective work, sneaking around, chasing shadows and red-tape… it wasn't him. And he was beginning to wonder if his payment was going to be worth all this trouble.

"What pump, sir?"

He jumped and turned to stare at the clerk. Since when has the lady bought her cigarettes? "Six."

"Sixty two dollars and fifty nine cents." Red X tried not to stare at the clerk's lazy eye as he handed over his credit card.

"I see you finally made it to the finish line."

Red X jumped and looked at the petite woman next to him. Raven looked almost unrecognizable in her civilian clothes, and for a second Red X wondered if he should have chosen something less… _sexy_. He wouldn't lie, in a bout of curiosity, he had bought her a pair of super tight "skinny-jeans" and stiletto knee-high books, which clung to her like a second skin. He really just wanted to see if she'd _actually_ put them on, he had bet himself five dollars she wouldn't. Guess he lost. Or won… he wasn't sure. "Nice to see the clothes fit. Ready to go?"

"I don't know what you were thinking, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to kill you for buying these boots. I can barely walk, let alone fight." Raven shoved her hands into the leather jacket and started out the door, Red X followed behind her, pulling his keys out of his pocket.

"Yeah, but your ass looks fantastic."

There was a sharp growl before she turned to him. "I'm still holding onto my revolver."

"Thanks for letting me know." His engine purred to life and they started out onto the road, silence following them for a few moments. Raven had actually been quiet for the majority of the trip, not that he blamed her. There wasn't a whole lot that they had in common, not to mention that they were shoved into this _agreement_ by a redheaded alien who thought mustard was a beverage. Red X glanced over at Raven, who was now fidgeting with her clothes. "Everything okay?"

She turned and glared at him beneath her bangs. "As best as can be expected."

"Vague." Red X merged on to the highway. "Care to vent?"

"Not with you."

Red X rolled his eyes behind his dark glasses. Of course she was going to be like this. It didn't matter to her that he was her only life-line in this stupid quest. "Look, whether you want to admit or ignore it we're in this together. You can choose to accept the fact that, like it or not, you _hired_ me. You're _stuck_ with me and we might as well _pretend_ to like each other." There was a moment of steely silence in which Red X finally realized he had made a fatal error, and he wondered what blood would do to his leather seats.

"I can _barely_ tolerate you. I can _barely_ tolerate the fact that I don't have a single friend to turn to, but I have a _thief_ who is about as obnoxious as a swarm of mosquitoes." Raven turned on him, and Red X thought his heart had stopped. If looks could kill. "Listen, Red X, I woke up in an empty tower with _no one_. No friends, no leader, _nothing_. So, I'm sorry if I'm not Chatty Cathy, but I've got a little more on my mind than babying your need for personal information."

_Babying_? Red X felt an indignant bubble rise into his chest. "I'm here to help, Raven. You came to me."

"Because I was _told_ to!"

"By an alien who isn't even on this planet anymore! If you didn't want to come you shouldn't have!" He snarled at her. "I had _jobs_ to do. More money, bigger challenges. I shouldn't be chasing after _your leader_ for _you_."

"I had no where else to go!" He could see her fingers twitch with the urge to hurt him. "What was I supposed to do?"

"Figure it out yourself. You're a big girl, you can do it alone."

Raven opened her mouth to say something rude, but nothing came out and she turned away. The air turned thick and cold, and Raven took a few ragged breaths, as if something was clawing at her. Red X saw her struggle with herself before she finally managed to get a few words out. "I can't handle being alone."

"Alone shouldn't be a problem." Red X scoffed. "I'm alone all the time."

"_Your_ solitude is a choice." Raven glanced at him, and Red X almost swore he saw the ghosts of tears in her eyes, but she hid her face before he could tell. He wondered if he had hit a nerve in her, and there was something inside him that cringed with guilt. Even if she was a Titan, that didn't give him the right to act like he did. Raven frowned, but didn't face him. "My solitude is a curse."

"It doesn't have to be that way." Red X caught her glare out of the corner of his eye. He sighed and shifted in his seat, did she always have to look at him like _that_? Like he had no idea what he was talking about. He knew what _alone_ meant. He knew how it felt to have no friends. But that didn't govern his decisions, it shouldn't govern hers.

"Look, can we stop this conversation right now? It's annoying." Raven pinched the bridge of her nose. "And I'm getting a headache."

Red X sighed in defeat and leaned back into his seat. "Fine by me. We'll be in Gotham in a few hours."

"Good." Raven leaned against the door and closed her eyes. "I'm going to take a nap."

Red X was about to say something else, but noticed the soft expression across her face. Damnit. The girl had already fallen asleep. Whatever. If she wanted to keep this strictly business, he would do just that. But… Red X shook his head. Everything felt _strange, _not wrong, but not right. As if keeping someone in his life for more than a few hours would be binding her to him. Red X barely kept anyone around him longer than a few minutes, but Raven had been here a day and things were starting to get unusual.

Like the fact that their conversation was starting to weigh on him. Was she right? Was being alone a curse? Or was it his choice? He didn't like having to second guess himself or his decisions. And he definitely didn't like thinking that he might have made the _wrong_ decision. Red X gripped the steering wheel tighter, determined not to think about it. They would be in Gotham soon, and this whole debacle would be over.

At least that was what he kept telling himself.

)O(

Raven woke up when she heard the purr of the engine stop abruptly. She blinked once before turning at looking at Red X, he was moving to shake her shoulder but she pushed him away. The last thing she needed was him touching her again. She wasn't sure why, but Raven couldn't handle him touching her. Her stomach felt ill and twisted, and she got far too warm, like she was overheating. She yawned and fumbled for the door handle. "Are we in Gotham?"

"Yeah. I figured we'd stop and grab a bite of food while we make a game plan." Red X shoved a lock of black hair out of his face and got out of the car. He raised his hands above his head and stretched his spine. "It's going to be like finding a needle in a haystack if we have to find a criminal mind in Gotham."

Raven glared at him as she got out of the car, gravel crunching under her feet. Her heart stopped for a moment as his words hit her. "What makes you think he's criminal? You said he was just… _dark_. Robin would never to anything criminal, I know he wouldn't." At least that was what she kept telling herself. Her subconscious kept bringing up images of him being Slade's apprentice, and Raven felt herself lying.

"Sorry." Red X raised an eyebrow. "I didn't mean it like that… I was just…"

"Just what? Insinuating that I may have to put away my leader because he's broken the law? Or worse?" Raven tried not to let her anger take over. In spite of Red X thought, her mind had wandered to that place. What would happen if she found him a shadow of the man he had been? What if all her fears came true, and Robin was beyond saving? Raven didn't want to think about that scenario, but there wasn't a choice. She needed to think about every situation, even the bad ones. "I know what I might have to do, having you stick your finger into that wound isn't helping."

"I said I was sorry…" Red X shook his head. "Never mind. Let's just get some food and talk about our next steps as reasonable adults. Okay?"

Raven took a deep breath and tried to calm her nerves. Being angry at him wasn't going to make things any better, and she knew that. But there was some piece of her that wanted to be angry at _something_, and she wasn't sure what. It just felt as if she needed to vent. "Okay. Food first, but then I have to make a phone call."

"Yes ma'am." Red X turned and started for the greasy spoon restaurant

Raven tried to follow, but she teetered on her heels, and had to grab the roof of the car for balance. What was he _thinking_ getting her shoes like this? She'd never be able to do a proper roundhouse while teetering on pins. Even if her "ass looked fantastic." Raven blushed and looked away from him, that comment had been completely inappropriate and uncalled for. But then again, what more did she expect from a thief?

"Having trouble?" Red X smirked.

"I wouldn't be if you had thought to buy me _reasonable_ shoes!" Raven tried not to growl at him as she fumbled to the front door and walked in. If he wanted to play games, she would play games. Red X followed her inside as they plopped into a booth. Minutes passed in silence before a waitress came up and took their order. More silence. Raven glanced across the table top to see Red X fidgeting. She sighed and rolled her eyes. "What?"

"I just…" He sighed and leaned back into the booth, crossing his arms over his chest. There was a pause as Red X watched a bus slide by them, kicking up gray slush in its wake. Finally he turned back to her and raised an eyebrow, which peeked over the sunglasses he was still wearing. "I'm just wondering exactly _who_ you need to call at this hour?"

"Ghostbusters." Raven fidgeted with the straw in her water glass and she stared blankly at him. His lips twitched as if he was trying not to smile, and Raven sighed in response. "Who do you think, genius? I'm going to try and contact the one person Robin would have gone to."

"Besides you?"

Her face flushed and she looked away, pretending to ignore him. He needed to keep his comments to himself. In spite of the tapestry he weaved, there was nothing going on between her and Robin. He was her leader, her comrade, and her friend. A lover he was not. She glanced up at Red X and sighed. "Enough of the comments, we're business partners nothing more. You don't need to know everything that goes on in the tower." She rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Besides, I thought we already had this conversation?"

"Yeah. But I'm curious." Red X shrugged with one shoulder, as if this were just a conversation between friends. Raven didn't want to be friends with him, she could barely tolerate being business partners. "Why _you_? Why not Cyborg or Beast Boy? Why does this heavy duty have to fall to your frail shoulders?"

Raven sighed and raised an eyebrow, trying to decide if his questions were sincere, or if he just wanted to fill the silence between them. She got the distinct impression that he didn't like silence. Raven tried to look into his eyes, but those stupid glasses kept his eyes hidden. If he didn't want to know the real truth, she risked everything by telling it to him. "Do you really want to know, or is this some trick to just keep the conversation moving?"

Red X jerked at the forcefulness of her words, and his lips twitched in concern. Raven was slowly adjusting to his body language, trying to learn how to read him. Although, even with everything she was learning about him, he was still shrouded in mystery. And she wanted to keep it that way, but she wasn't sure why. She liked having the distance between them, distance was good. "Why? Is there something I should know?"

Raven chewed on her lip and examined the scratches on her fork. There was a long pause and she finally decided to tell him what he wanted to know, even if he didn't believe her. "Do you know you died once?"

"_I_ died?" She heard the incredulity and looked up to see him holding back a laugh. Of course he wouldn't understand. "And when was that?"

"About three years ago." Raven put the fork down and stared at him. As her eyes met his, the smile fell off his face and severity crept into his demeanor. At least he was taking her seriously now, that was an improvement. "My demon father used me as a portal to come to this dimension and take over the universe. Everyone on earth, except my friends, died and I was banished to the depths of Hell, left to be smothered by the evil I was born from."

Red X looked like he was choking on her words. "Are you serious?"

Raven nodded, fidgeting with her straw again. "Robin didn't give up on me. Even though the world had been destroyed. Even though everyone we knew was dead. Even though there was no hope left for me. He didn't give up." She barked out a shred of laughter, which sounded more forlorn than anything else. "He jumped into a world he didn't understand, a world filled with misery and fear, to save me. He could have given up. He could have taken our friends and left for another world, but he chose to save me." Raven glanced up at Red X and blushed. "That's why I have to go after Robin, because he came after me."

"I see." Red X didn't say anything else, and silence enfolded them for a few more minutes. He tapped his fingers on the melamine countertop before looking at her, his lips firm with determination. "And you're okay with this? With traipsing after a leader who made a stupid decision? With having to take responsibility for something you had no control over?"

Raven wished she had her powers back. She could have taught him a lesson in pissing her off. "I'm choosing it. It's not some holy quest I was forced to do. It something I _want_ to do. Something Robin deserves." She hissed a long breath between her teeth and moved for the edge of the booth. "Not that you would have any idea what _loyalty_ means."

Raven stormed toward the back of the restaurant where the pay phones were. Her anger was getting the better of her because she punched in the numbers with more forcefulness than she wanted. It was his fault. If he didn't have that stupid "holier-than-thou" attitude, she would feel the urge to punch him every thirty seconds. Who did he think he was? He had no right to make any sort of assumption against her or her situation. He was a _thief_. Nothing more.

"Hello." The familiar, softly aged voice of Alfred soothed Raven's nerves, and she felt a smile touch her lips.

"Alfred. It's Raven… I…" Raven didn't know how to explain what she wanted to say. How was she supposed to tell him that she was looking for Bruce's ward, who may have gone temporarily insane? She rubbed her forehead and groaned. In the silence, Alfred must have connected the dots, and he gave a slight sigh.

"You are looking for Master Grayson?"

"Yes. I… I need to speak with Bruce." She chewed on her lip and glanced back at Red X, who was shoving food around his plate. He glanced up at her, and Raven could almost swear he heard her conversation. If he did, she was dead by all parties involved. "If that's possible."

"Mm…" Alfred paused and there was the sound of him moving around. "We were concerned no one was going to come. Shall we meet you somewhere?"

"Well… did he come home?"

"Briefly…" he cleared he throat, and Raven knew he was going to ask the question she didn't want to hear. "Is there something going on we should know about? Has something happened to Master Grayson?"

Raven cringed and turned away from Red X's piercing stare, exposing nothing more than her back. She rubbed her forehead again, sighing. "I'm not sure. Maybe. I wanted to come to the house and have a look around. I've… inherited some new powers that might help us." She stared at her free hand before glancing out the window.

"Ahh. I'll come pick you up in the car."

"That might be a bad idea, I've got… company."

There was a long pause as Alfred savored her words. He was formulating a plan of escape. Thank god for small miracles. "If you can slip away, I will pick you at the Plaza in an hour."

"Thank you." Raven hung up and walked back to the booth, plopping down in front of Red X. He was casually munching on a fry, waiting for some kind of explanation as to who she called. Let him think what he wanted, she wasn't telling him anything. Raven kept quiet and ate her food in silence. Fifteen minutes passed. It would take her twenty minutes to get to the Plaza, which meant she had to kill thirty minutes with Red X, and somehow convince him to leave her alone while Alfred took her back to Wayne Manor.

Raven swallowed a snort. Like that would happen.

"We need a base of operation."

Raven looked up, frowning. "For what?"

"For bird brain." He stretched his hands behind his head and leaned back. Raven watched his muscles ripple with subtle power. A blush covered her cheeks and she turned away. What in the hell was she _staring _at? He was on the wrong side of the law, and she was watching him like some kind of hormonal teenager. This day was too long. Red X sighed and shook his head. "Who knows how long we're going to be here, trying to find Robin. And, as much as I love my baby, I am not sleeping in it."

"So where do you want to go?" Raven raised an eyebrow.

"How about the Plaza? It's centrally located and easily recognizable. If we need to do some sort of stake out, we can find our way back without too much trouble." He watched her with cold eyes, and Raven wondered if he heard her and Alfred's conversation. Could he do that? She suppressed a growl and kept her expression blank. He had to be toying with her.

"If you think that's the best plan, then let's go."

"I'll pay the bill, you can head out to the car."

"Gee, Thanks." Raven rolled her eyes and started for the door, casting one last glance at him. Not for the first time that day, Raven wondered exactly _what_ she had gotten herself into and how in the world she was going to get out of it.

)O(

_I'm not sure how edited this actually is. Hopefully it's not too bad, but I was getting a little tired of looking at it. Ha ha! Anyway, let me know how you feel about this chapter, there'll be a little more action in the next chapter. Thanks again!_

_With Love Always: Xaph!_


	8. Rule

**Wide Awake**  
Chapter Seven: Rule

"Where on earth is hope in the age like this?  
Can we believe in what we can't see nor touch?  
I just nod silently and close my eyes calmly  
Because I can feel clearly now that we are certainly connected"  
- _Rule_, Ayumi Hamasaki

)O(

"Stop pacing."

Raven paused and looked outside the window, trying to see if she could spot the outline of Bruce's Bentley. There was nothing but gray slush of snow, piling in front of the entrance. Peopled ducked in and out of the front entrance, but no one that had the familiar, unhurried gait of Alfred. Raven sighed and pushed hair out of her face. She still had five minutes before he should show up anyway, and he was known for his punctuality. Red X was unpacking some of his equipment, watching her out of the corner of his eye. He had to know something was up, otherwise he wouldn't have chosen _this_ hotel. Raven shoved a hand through her hair and resumed her worn path on the carpet. "I'm just… anxious."

"I see that." Red X carefully pulled out his smoke bombs and counted them. Raven felt the air turn cold as he looked at her, frowning. He was waiting for her to open up. Tough luck. "Any particular reason?"

She bit back a growl. "Do I need a reason?"

"No, not really." He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back on his heels to watch her. Raven felt indignant under his gaze. He knew something was up, there was no other explanation for his glare. "I'm just curious as to where you're jetting off to in a few minutes?"

Raven stopped, mid-step, and turned to him. Her stomach twisted as she realized the vital error she made: underestimating Red X. She rubbed her forehead and sighed. "You knew?"

"I guessed." He raised an eyebrow. "Am I allowed to tag along, or is it some big Titan secret?"

"I…" Raven sighed and shook her head. He was more than obnoxious, he was down right annoying. He needed to be turned over her knee a spanked like a small child. Actually… scratch that. He was strange enough to probably enjoy it. "If I say you can't come, will you follow me anyway?"

"No." Raven watched him, trying to decide if he was serious or not. Red X sighed and turned back to his supplies, rifling around in one of his bags. "Look, you have my word that I will not follow or tail you." He snorted. "In all honesty, I will probably just hang out at the hotel until you get back."

"Why?"

"Because I'm in a city I'm not familiar with and I don't know where all the good clubs are."

Raven sighed and put her hands on her hips. Of course he was going to play this game with her now. "That's not what I meant." He turned just enough so that she could see the corner of his eye, and in the dim light of the hotel room, she caught a flash of onyx behind his glasses. Raven was stunned back the darkness, and took a step back is surprise. His eyes were like endless pools of black, and the intensity frightened her. It looked like years of hurt and secrets were locked up behind them. Catching her breath, she managed to finish her question. "I… I mean why won't you follow me?"

"Because I understand that there are some things that need to stay hidden." He turned to face her and Raven felt the air turn from cold to awkward. It was as if there was a shifting between them; that their business understanding was morphing into something else, something neither of them understood. He raked a hand through his hair and sighed. "Just… stay safe, Raven. I'll get an earful from wonder boy if I return you in less than perfect condition. And I can't handle his lectures. They put me to sleep."

"I…" Raven glanced at the digital clock, her stomach twisted as she glanced at the time. Was he being honest with her? Could she even trust him? Did she have any choice? Raven tried not to groan in defeat. He knew _exactly_ what he was doing. He was giving her a battered path with no other escape route, and she was forced to take it. "I'll be back in a few hours."

"Alright. Let me know if something comes up." Red X handed her a piece of paper with a number on it. "My phone."

"I didn't know you had one."

"I get a disposable one every month. So, don't think you can trace me." A smile peeled across his lips, and the awkwardness between them vanished. There was the Red X she knew and understood.

"Pft. Like I would want to see you after this." Raven felt the corner of her lips turn up, and she squashed the smile before it happened. Grabbing her coat, she headed for the door. "See you later. Don't wait up."

"Don't come back injured." They stared at each other for a moment before Raven turned and walked out the door. She had the strangest feeling that this "business arrangement" was going to end badly. But what choice did she have? She was a sitting duck for danger if she tried to find Robin on her own, and there wasn't anyone else she could really turn to. She had thought about contacting Cyborg or Beast Boy, but if Raven knew anything about her friends, she knew they were volatile. They would blame Robin for everything that happened. That he had used all of his last chances. They would be hurt and angry, and Raven wouldn't blame them in the least.

She fidgeted with the hem on her shirt as she stepped out of the elevator. In all honesty, they would be right. As much as it pained her to think, Robin _had_ used up all of his chances. In fact, the team had constantly given him _extra_ chances, just to see it thrown back in their faces. But this was _Robin,_ their leader, her best friend, her comrade. She couldn't just leave him where he lay, especially not in the dark recesses of his mind. No one deserved that.

"Miss Raven?"

Raven jumped and looked up to see a weathered, but familiar face. Alfred. Never had she thought she would be so happy to see him before. She tried not to grin like an idiot as she followed him to the car. Like the gentleman he was, he opened the backseat door and ushered her inside. He moved around the expensive car before sliding inside, and Raven let go of a breath she didn't know she'd been holding.

"It's been a while, Alfred," she said as they started down the darkened, snowy streets of Gotham.

He turned and looked at her in the rearview mirror with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. He knew that something terrible must have happened, and there was nothing Raven could do to ease those fears. "It has been, Miss Raven. I just wish the situation was a little better."

"I do too." Raven turned to look out the window. Silence filled the car until she couldn't take it anymore. She spent the last three months in silence, she needed some kind of familiar conversation. Something that didn't involve Red X. "How long was Robin here for? When he came by?"

"A few days at most." Alfred turned onto a suburb road that started towards the outskirts of the city. There was another, long pause and Raven saw confusion and concern wrinkle his brow. "We didn't see very much of him. He left at night and slept most of the day. To be completely honest, we weren't even sure why he returned home. He mentioned something about you…" Alfred glanced at her in the rearview mirror again, and Raven felt guilt rise into her throat. Alfred had always had the ability to do that to her. "Is there something going on we should know about?"

"I…" Raven looked away, frowning."I was gone for a while."

"Ah." Alfred didn't pry her for any more information than what she gave, which was something she appreciated about him. Anyone else would have been poking her with every question that came to mind, because the situation. There were a few more minutes of silence before Alfred steered the conversation in another direction. "If you don't mind me asking, is there a reason you are alone? Where are Mister Logan and Stone?"

Raven couldn't help the corners of her lips from turning up. Never in her life did she think that Cyborg and Beast Boy be referred as "mister" anything. She let out a small sigh before looking back at Alfred. "It's… complicated."

"Ah." Silence followed the conversation as they turned down a long, sheltered drive. The familiar, shadow of Wayne Manor loomed ahead of them and Raven was beginning to wonder if she had made the right decision on coming here. What had she been thinking? And why did she keep asking herself that question?

Alfred stopped in the circle drive in front of the house, and Raven could see the bulky, shadowed figure block out the light in the doorway. Her heart jumped up into her throat as they stopped at the bottom of the front steps. There was a pause, like a guillotine blade waiting to drop, where emotions and thoughts teetered on whether or not she should be here, and then the dark mass moved down the steps making the decision for her.

"I see you made it just fine, Raven." Bruce opened the door for her and Raven just sat on the edge of the backseat, staring up at his and Alfred's familiar faces. She let Bruce help her out of the car and followed him into the massive house, being careful of the antiques that lined the wall of the empty foyer. No one said anything as motions were performed the way they had always been. Alfred took her jacket and Bruce started down the hallway to the library. Raven followed, trying not to feel intimidated by the echo of her following footsteps.

"Come on in, Raven."

Raven cautiously entered the room and took her place on a plush, velvet sofa. Bruce sat down across from her and they watched each other for a long moment. She could almost feel the questions hang in the air between them, as if they were both trying to say everything and nothing at the same time. She rubbed her arms and looked away shyly. "I'm sorry for just barging in unexpectedly… it's kind of a strange situation."

"So I've assumed." There was a long pause as he stared into the fire. "It's really sad that these are the circumstances we see each other under." Raven nodded, but kept silent for a long while. Bruce finally glanced back at her before clearing his throat. "Alfred told me you had a… straggler?"

Raven jerked in surprise and felt color rise to her face. What was her problem? She shouldn't have been embarrassed about a thorn in her side like Red X. Annoyed, maybe even a little ashamed she had to work with a criminal because she was too weak to work by herself, but not embarrassed. Raven shrugged it off and looked over at Bruce. "I guess you can call him that. I consider him more of a nuisance."

Bruce raised his eyebrows in surprise. "Is there a reason you're traveling with a nuisance?"

"I…" Raven rubbed her forehead and tried to explain her actions, but how could she explain this whole situation? How could she even _start_? Bruce continued to look at her calmly, his expression never changing. Leave it to him to say nothing, and still coerce her into talking. She sighed and leaned back into the sofa.

"It's kind of a long story…" And without any other preamble, she fell into the story of how she ended up in Gotham, with no powers, no memories, and a wanted criminal for a companion. Bruce kept quiet for the whole story, never asking questions or pointing fingers. He just seemed to absorb the information. When she had finished, Raven took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She felt… better. She hadn't realized that she was keeping everything bottled up inside her, and having someone (who wasn't an annoying criminal) listen to her, made everything calmer somehow.

"So… now you have no powers, no way to reach your emotions, and you're hanging around a wanted criminal who is helping you find Robin, who you believe has gone rogue?" Brice rubbed his chin and stared at her with his heave gaze. "And now you think you are getting new powers and you want to use them to see if you can figure out what is wrong with Robin… am I getting all of this correct?"

"Yes." Raven rubbed the bridge of her nose. "That about sums up the whole story."

"I see… If you don't mind me asking, Raven." She glanced up as he moved from his chair to the fireplace mantle. "Where exactly are Garfield and Victor in all of this? Shouldn't they be helping you?"

"I… they don't know where I am." Raven ducked her head low so he wouldn't see her shame.

"Ah… That could explain the calls."

Raven's stare shot up to look at Bruce. "Calls? Have they been contacting you?"

"Almost every hour." Bruce frowned. "What did you think they would do, Raven?" He raised an eyebrow and Raven felt color flood her face again. "Imagine how they feel, Raven. They had been out looking for the whereabouts of Robin, and when they return to the tower, they found Starfire, who was supposed to be watching you, gone, and your medical bed empty. You didn't take your communicator, and they had no idea where you could have run off to. You scared them into an early grave." Bruce shook his head. "They must have called everyone they knew of in order to keep a look out for you. Why didn't you tell them what happened?"

"I…" Raven glanced away. "It was a stupid move, I know that. But I also know they were looking for Robin because it was their duty. Because they felt _obligated._ They don't understand why Robin did what he did. I know that they're upset that he left us again, and they don't think that he deserves another chance. Not after all the ones we've given him before."

"Maybe they're right." Bruce's bold words made her look up and glare. Of all the things he could have said, that was not one she was expecting. Bruce was Robin's benefactor, and he was supposed to be the one backing up her decisions, not breaking them down. "Robin has had several chances to make the right decision, and yet he always seems to wander down a darker, rougher path. Maybe he used up his last mulligan. Maybe this time he doesn't get to start over." Bruce folded his hands in his lap and stared at Raven, his eyes boring into her a lot stronger than she wanted.

"I can't believe that." Raven knew that his words were true: Robin did not deserve a second chance, at least not in her friends' eyes. But she refused to think that; this was _Robin_, her leader, her best friend, and she would not give up on him. Not yet. Raven stood up and approached Bruce, frowning. "I cannot believe that he doesn't get another chance. He's saved all of us more times than we care to count. And we've all taken our chances with leaving the team. We shouldn't be judging him because of something that was out of his control."

Bruce's expression softened, and he placed a hand on her shoulder. Raven raised an eyebrow as he moved her toward the door. "It's good to know you're not doing this just because no one else is. You at least believe in what you are doing, and that's something Robin will need when you find him." Bruce opened the door and walked to a staircase to his left, Raven followed him, still keeping silent. "I didn't want to throw you further into this situation, unless you really knew what you were getting into, Raven."

He glanced over at her as they ascended the stairs. "I called Garfield and Victor when Robin first stopped by, I believe you were still in the medical ward, neither of them seemed very concerned. Victor said that maybe it was time for Robin to have a real break. When I asked why, Victor didn't answer… I initially figured there was some kind of fight between everyone, and so I didn't press further. If I had known what _really_ happened…" Bruce tried to give her a smile, but it was broken, and didn't quite reach his eyes. "Well, I guess we'll never know now. The only thing we can do at this point is to get him back."

Raven tried not to ask the question weighing on her chest, but it had to come out. She had to know. "How… how was he? When you saw him last?"

"He was here a few days ago, I keep expecting him to show up again… but I know better." He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. "We had a fight. I knew what was happening to him, what was going on, but of course he wouldn't listen. And so, we fought, every afternoon, and the last one was so bad. We said such angry things to each other." Bruce raked a hand through his hair, and Raven felt the strongest urge to reach out and comfort him. Robin had always been like a son to Bruce, and watching him struggle through this was no easy task. "But, Robin was… he was dark."

"That's what I keep getting told." Raven sighed and pressed a hand to her forehead. "But I'm not quite sure what that means, or what I have to do."

Bruce stopped outside of Robin's room and looked down at Raven. She felt suddenly uncomfortable under the weight of his stare, and took a small step back. It was like he was keeping whatever he saw locked up inside, and that scared Raven. "Everything is different about him. The Robin we know is still there, but it's hidden under something else…" He paused and glanced away. "As far as I can tell he's been playing vigilante at night… trying to save lives to make up for the one he lost."

"The one he lost?"

"You." Bruce said nothing more and opened the door. Raven felt color rise into her face again as she thought about his words. Had her situation really caused such distress in Robin? How? And why? She tried not to think about all of that as she stepped into the bedroom. Now was neither the time nor the place, there was work to be done. She walked deeper into the quiet, still room that seemed to be filled with all the broken memories and emotions Robin left behind. Bruce had ducked out, leaving her alone with shreds of her leader's sanity. Her ears seemed to thrum with the left over energy, pieces tying and untying themselves, trying to get her attention.

"Robin… where have you gone…?" Raven wandered through the room, looking to the place that would have the most memories, the place that would hold onto Robin. Finally, she drew back the thick comforter on the bed and stared at the sheets. They were stained with blood, and that scared her. Whose blood was it? She placed her hand on the pillow. Nothing happened at first, and Raven wondered if she was doing something wrong. Or even worse, what if that power was a one-time-use thing? Minutes passed in uncomfortable stillness, and Raven was about to give up and head to another part of the room.

_What have I done?_

Raven had to remind herself not to snatch her hand back, or she would break the bond. She took a deep breath and listened to the voice whispering in her head, trying to find out more.

_How did I let this happen? Why couldn't I save her?_

It was Robin. These were the memories he left behind from earlier this week. His emotions were still fresh and vibrant, and Raven could almost feel what he was feeling. It ripped through her heart and slipped into her like a swift moving river.

_She should have been kept safe. I should have kept her safe. But I let her slide out of my grasp. Why did this happen? Why couldn't I stop it? Why couldn't I save her?_ Raven tried to listen to more but it filtered out of existence, just like it had the last time she tried to listen to memories. Feeling somewhat frustrated, Raven fell into the bed, surrounding herself with what was left of Robin. Nothing more was whispered to her, and she couldn't stop the tears from rolling down her face.

Robin blamed himself for what happened to her. For something even she couldn't understand or even predict. And now he felt like he had to live with the shadows of the memories _she_ had left inside him. He wanted to make everything right, but he couldn't. He didn't know how to fix it. Raven wasn't sure how long she laid there and cried, but Alfred's soft knock woke her up.

"Miss Raven… I think it's time you return to the hotel."

She wiped at her tears with the back of her hand and crawled out of Robin's bed. She stared at the empty sheets for a moment, wondering if there was anything she could have done or said to make herself feel better. There wasn't. And so she turned and walked into the hall, leaving her connection with Robin in his empty room.

She followed Alfred down into the foyer, where Bruce was waiting. He gave her a weak smile and patted her shoulder. "Stay safe, Raven. Let me know if you need my help… although I feel as though I would do nothing more than hinder the situation." He shook his head and sighed. "When you see him, please tell him I'm sorry…I never meant for this to happen."

"None of us did." Raven gave him the strongest smile she could, but she had the distinct feeling that it didn't quite reach her eyes. "But I will let him know."

"Thank you." Pause. "And will you please call the others and let them know you are safe?"

"I'll try to remember." And nothing more was said. Raven tuned and stepped into the cold, December night heading back into Gotham, and hopefully closer to Robin. Alfred was kind enough not to bring up any discussions on the ride back, which left Raven alone to think about what she had discovered. The most important thing she knew now was that Robin had been in Gotham a few days ago, and could even still be here now. She also learned that he blamed himself for what happened to her, which everyone believed was turning him into the volatile person he was now.

Raven pressed a hand to her forehead. There were too many factors to think about, and everything was stabbing into her life a hot knife, trying to get her attention. It was just too much for her to handle. She tapped on Alfred's shoulder. "Let me out here, Alfred… I want to walk the rest of the way to the hotel."

"Are you sure? It's awfully cold tonight."

"I know… I just need the air." Alfred was giving her a disapproving stare in the rearview mirror. Raven fought the urge to roll her eyes. Of course he was just looking out for her, but she just needed a moment. She needed a _long _moment. She needed to make sense of everything she learned tonight. "Please, Alfred?"

"Alright, Miss Raven. Just stay safe, or both Master Grayson and Master Bruce will have my head." He smiled at her and pulled the car to the side of the road. Raven stepped out and waved goodbye as he honked the horn and merged back into traffic. Raven saw the bright lights from the hotel three blocks ahead, there seemed to be some kind of commotion going on there, but it didn't matter right now. Everything would be just fine and she now she had some time to herself to think. At least, that was what she thought.

She had taken about three steps when a crash sounded from a darkened alleyway, followed by the brief sound of an alarm before being cut silent. Raven didn't even hesitate, although she knew she should have. She knew should have gone back to the hotel and grabbed Red X. She should have pretended not to hear anything. But Raven needed an outlet, and her brain wouldn't let her forget her duty as a superhero. Against all good thought, she rushed down the alley.

"Do you think anyone heard us?"

"No! Everyone is too concerned with that stupid party going on at the hotel. Look at this."

"Sweet…"

Raven ducked behind a dumpster and glanced around. The window had been broken out from a seedy pawn shop that was tucked in the back of the alley She heard the sound of two clumsy criminals rifling around for valuables. Judging by all the noise they were making, it was easy to tell that they weren't very experienced. Good, this would be simple. A good scare and a good kick to the head, then she could alert the police and be back to the hotel in time to take a much needed bath. Easy.

"Dude, all this guy has is a bunch of junk! Look at this crap, DVDs? A fake gold chain. Cha. What a waste of time."

"Hey! Here's some diamonds."

"Stop right there." Raven moved around the dumpster and into the shadows, just enough so that they couldn't see her face, but could see her outline in the darkness. One of the thieves moved and dropped a bag he was holding. Time seemed to hang uncomfortably in the air as they stared at each other. "Exactly _what_ do you think you're doing?"

"Making a living. What are you doing?"

Raven growled. "Stopping you." She jumped through the window and tackled the ankles of the criminal that dropped the bag. He screamed loudly as they tumbled to the ground. The sounds of tinkling glass muffled the noise of their struggle. The first criminal wrestled with Raven for a few minutes before managing to yank at her hair and give her shoulder a heavy kick. Raven bit back a scream, and he ran out the door. The second criminal had taken a hunting knife out of a display case, and held it pointed at Raven.

"You're too pretty to be wandering around at night." Raven crawled to her feet and fell into fighting stance. He didn't seem to be impressed, and twirled the knife between his fingers. "Didn't your mother ever teach you to be afraid of the dark?"

"Didn't your daddy ever tell you not to mess with girls?" Raven slid forward a few inches before delivering a hard roundhouse to his ribs. There was the sound of cracking bone, and he went down with a loud curse, but quickly crawled back to his feet.

"Bitch."

Raven stepped forward again, but the thief was too quick. He threw the knife with surprising aim for the darkness, and it slid right through the flesh of Raven's bicep. Time stood still for the briefest of seconds, before she screamed and fell to the ground. The criminal laughed and kicked her in the ribs. "How do you like it now, Princess?"

"Fuck you." Raven, trying to see through the red in her vision, ripped the knife out of her bicep and stabbed it into his thigh, then yanked it downward. Blood gushed from an artery she hit, and he fell to the floor. Ignoring his screams of pain, Raven crawled to her feet and stumbled into the alleyway. Let him rot. The criminal continued to shout profanity, but she pretended not to hear him. She knew not to mess with this anymore than she already did, or her anger would get the best of her. A thin coat of sweat covered her face as she walked the three blocks, which suddenly felt like three miles.

People rushed past her, pretending not to notice the stumbling girl. One bastard called her a wino and pushed her into a wall. Raven had half a mind to remove a testicle. The hotel was packed with people all trying to take photos of some a-list party that was going on in the ballroom, so no one noticed the wounded, purple haired vigilante who had just lost her first fight. Raven ducked into an elevator and finally took a look at her arm. It was pouring blood down the sleeve of her jacket, and the pain was enough to make her want to pass out. She needed help quickly.

The doors opened and Raven stared up into a pair of sunglassed eyes. She sighed in relief.

"Oh, hey. I was going to go downstairs to see what the commotion was… oh my fucking god, Raven? What in all of hell did you do?" Without hesitating, Red X peeled off his own coat and put it over her shoulders. He pulled her off the elevator and led her down the hallway, back into their room. Even without her powers, Raven could feel his anger radiating off him. He was _pissed._ "What did I tell you? I said _stay safe_! What if the hell were you thinking?"

"I don't know." Raven stumbled into the bathroom where the blood would be easy to clean. Red X watched her from the doorway, frowning. "I… I thought I could take them. They were just stupid thieves."

"Yeah? Well now you're a stupid hero." Red X raked a hand through his hair and stared at her sitting on the edge of the tub. "Just… sit there and try not to bleed too much." He grabbed his medical kit and walked back into the bathroom. Raven stared up into the most beautiful, onyx eyes she had ever seen.

So, that's what he was hiding behind his mask. Pity he didn't show his eyes more often. Red X peeled off his designer, white shirt, and Raven couldn't help her eyes from wandering down his broad, chiseled chest. Even if she was bleeding like a stuck pig, it was hard to ignore the way his long, lean muscled rippled under alabaster skin. He moved with the strength and grace of a skilled thief and Raven, try as she might, couldn't ignore the warmth building in her stomach.

"What a stupid thing to do, Raven… you should have come right back to the room! Not gallivanting off to vanquish crime." Red X took a knife and cut her shirt from her body so she didn't have to struggle in getting it off. For a moment, she thought she saw his own eyes wander over her, but it might have just been her mind playing tricks. It could have even been the blood loss.

"It hurts."

Red X's fingers paused over her wound and he looked down at her sighing. Raven saw a flicker of something unusual in his eyes, but chose to ignore it. It didn't matter, did it? "Of course it hurts, Raven. You got stabbed in the right arm by... I'm guessing a _giant_ hunting knife."

"I… I never thought it would hurt _this_ much."

"Well, we learned something new today didn't we?"

"Yeah… you're hiding one hell of a body under those t-shirts?" Red X paused again and Raven thought maybe she was supposed to react, but she didn't. Red X rolled his eyes and smacked her good arm.

"That's not what I meant."

"Oh… well… what was I supposed to learn?" Raven was getting light headed, and she let her head fall back against the tiled wall.

"That stabbing hurts…. Hey! Don't you _dare_ fall asleep on me! You have to stay awake, Sunshine." Red X grabbed a needle and his lighter. He burnt the needle clean before threading it, and Raven watched his careful movements with some curiosity. She cocked her head to the side, trying to stay awake like he asked.

"Your hands are so calm… like a surgeon's."

"Well, I have to do this a lot." He handed her a washcloth before opening a bottle of disinfectant. "This is going to burn like a mother fucker. Try not to scream too loudly. You might want to bite on that." Raven tried to put it in her mouth, but her movements were sluggish. Red X growled and snatched in out of her hand. He rolled the washcloth up and glared down at her. "Open up." Without waiting, he shoved the washcloth into her mouth, and then poured disinfectant on her wound.

Raven screamed. She screamed until she thought her lungs were going to burst. Her arm felt like it was going to burn right off. She turned at glared at Red X, plotting ways to kill him slowly, as he began to sew the wound close. After what felt like hours of torture, Red X finally tied the last stitch and snipped the thread. He then took a small paring knife and held it in the flame of his lighter. After a few minutes he took it out, and placed the burning blade over the wound, cauterizing it.

"There… better." He took the washcloth out of her mouth and slipped in half of a small, yellow pill. "That's a little bit of morphine. It'll help you sleep tonight. If the pain gets too bad, let me know and I'll give you more." He bent over the edge of the bathtub and hooked his arms underneath her body. He pulled her out of the bathtub and took her back into their room. "Let me dress this, okay? After I'm done, you need to get some sleep."

"Red X?" Raven watched at he wrapped gauze around her wound. He made no indication that he was listening, but Raven continued anyway. "Thank you… I didn't think this would happen."

Red X sighed. "No one ever does." He glanced up at her. "Just… don't let think happen again."

"I'll try not." There was another pause. "Hey, Red X?"

He heaved out another irritated sigh and looked up. "What?"

Raven wanted to blame it on the blood loss, or the morphine. She wanted to blame it on the fact that she was tired, that she had a long day, or that she was emotionally unstable. She wanted to blame it on a lot of things. But at that moment, when he was showing her such kindness and sincerity, she wasn't sure what to blame it on. But it happened.

She bent down and kissed Red X.

)O(

_So… yeah. Sorry I've been AWOL for so long! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, please leave a review! I love to hear what you think. Next to be updated will me either __Little Blue Riding Hood__ or __Switched, Swapped, and Flip-Flipped_. _Thanks AGAIN!_


	9. Kettering

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Eight: Kettering_

"I wish that I had known  
In the first minute we met  
The unpayable debt  
That I owed you."  
- _Kettering_, The Antlers

)O(

Shock.

That was the first thing that ran through Red X's system. Complete and utter shock. It was surprising enough to see level headed Raven _stabbed_, bleeding profusely, and half-naked in their bathroom. But now she was kissing him? And… well, quite frankly, she was good at it. Red X couldn't stop himself from returning what she offered; he had never had a real kiss. Most of what he encountered were sloppy, drunken kisses stolen in corners of dance clubs. Girls too high on alcohol or drugs to really understand or remember what they were doing. And normally, he liked it that way, there were no strings, no chances of getting hurt.

But this was pure passion, not drunken horniness, and Raven was tearing down all of his defenses with it. He could feel her sincerity and her need to connect with him through her kiss. It felt good and honest, and it was something he needed desperately. He leaned into her full, soft lips, bringing his hand around to the back of her head. He threaded his fingers in her soft hair and pulled her mouth closer. He urged her lips open and swept his tongue inside. She tasted of plums and blood, and everything dark. Oh, God, why did she have to be sitting on that pedestal, completely untouchable? He sought her mouth hungrily, drinking in her very essence until both their lips were raw and abused.

"Don't do this to me, Raven…" His voice sounded harsh against her lips. "You're going to break my heart." He leaned back into her mouth and kissed her roughly. They fell back onto the bed, tangling in the sheets, their lips never leaving each other. Red X pressed her into the mattress nuzzling the soft, fragrant skin on her neck, and she let out a soft whimper in response. His hands wandered over her body, trying to memorize all the curves and hollows of her skin. She shifted under him, trying to get closer, and then moaned as her wounded arm twisted.

The change took less than a heartbeat, and Red X sprung off her as if he'd been burned. He backed away until he collided with the far wall, staring at her as if she had a second head. Raven was in a similar state of panic, and had backed herself against the headboard into a sitting position. The silence grew thick and tangible as they stared at each other, both of them feeling as if an entire room wasn't enough space between them, that even the width of the world wouldn't have been enough. Everything changed with that one, stupid mistake.

Raven was breathing heavily, shaking as she pulled the covers off the bed and around her half naked body, a body that Red X would have given his left arm to touch again. He needed to stop those thoughts, or was going to ruin their business understanding. If he hadn't ruined it already. He raked a hand through his hair, trying not to growl at his actions. What had he done? "I… I'm sorry, Raven…"

"No. It was my fault… I…" Raven buried her face in her hands. "I… guess I just got carried away."

"I…" Red X gasped for shreds of air between his broken pauses. "I think we might… need to be apart for a little bit." Time stood still and then she nodded, never blinking as she stared at his face. Red X started for his jacket, feeling her stare follow him around the suddenly tiny room. He managed to steal a glance at her, shock still sewn across her face. Red X fumbled with his zipper, his fingers feeling sluggish and foreign. "I'll be back soon…" He finally managed to look her in the eyes, seeing her fright hide in their plum shadows. "I promise… stay safe." The words felt different now on his lips, and Red X didn't want to think about them anymore. He had told her to stay safe before, and look what happened? Chaos, followed by blood shed, oh and their vigorous make-out session in Raven's less-than-par state. What a freaking sap.

He walked out of the room, but didn't get very far. Red X fell against the wall, staring at the patterns in the carpet and wishing he could make this whole mess just disappear. What was he thinking? This whole debacle was just one terrible event after another, and Red X was seriously starting to doubt his decision-making skills. It took another minute of calming down his heart before he could move again. He walked through the hotel, but it didn't really feel like he was there, or that anything was real. It was as if the world moved past him, and he just stood still and let it. What else could he do?

Pushing past the left-over stragglers of paparazzi, he stumbled out onto the street and drank in the sharp, crisp air. The coolness burned his lungs, but it felt good. It felt like a penance for his sins. Red X took long, deep breaths as he adjusted to the cold December night. Slowly, he turned and looked toward the top of the building, counting the windows until he reached their room. For a moment, he thought he saw a plum colored shadow fill the frame, but it could have been the light. Or it could have been her.

"She needs to be resting." Red X tried not to growl as he started down the street. He had no particular destination in mind. After what had happened in the hotel room, anywhere he could go to cool off his head was where he needed to be. Anywhere but in that tiny room, so close to a forbidden fruit. What had he been thinking? Letting her do that?

He knew what was coming when she moved towards him, but he let it happen. Maybe some tiny part of him wanted it to happen, wanted to see what the reaction would be. Would it have been an awkward moment, or a chemical explosion? Look at the results, a chemical explosion it was, and everything else was beginning to suffer. His "business understanding" was starting to break apart, hanging precariously to the edge of a knife, all because of his one, stupid decision.

And the sad part was, he probably would make it again if he could.

Red X finally let go of the growl he had been fighting and paused outside of a ritzy jewelry store, staring into the window. He stared at the reflections of snow flakes before his eyes managed to focus on what was in the box. An antique choker set with twelve carats of diamonds stared back at him. The gold work on it was fantastic, beautiful and intricate, like art from a far away bazaar. As if forgetting where he was, and falling into something familiar, Red X looked around the edges of the glass for the security system, hoping for a challenge. He was a little disappointed it was so simple. The system was designed to keep petty thieves out, not someone like him. Sad.

He stepped back and stared at it again, when an image of Raven stretched out on a chaise lounge wearing nothing more that that necklace and a seductive smile. His stomach turned to lead and he jerked away from the window, nearly running into some pedestrian behind him. He muttered an apology, trying to keep his blush from creeping up his neck. This was just making things worse.

Red X turned and walked away, trying to wipe the image from his mind. More than anything, he needed to remember that this was first and foremost, a _business_ understanding, _not_ a frolic through the hormonal forest. But, the feelings wouldn't go away, images and sounds lingered, brushing against him, making him see Raven as more than what he should have. And, maybe part of him wanted it that way... or maybe he was just plain stupid. Sometimes he really believed the latter more than anything.

He wandered down the street, staring at the sidewalk as he tried to think of _anything_ he could do to make this go away. But there was nothing. They had both made such a terrible error, that there was nothing they could do but sweep the dirt under the rug and pretend that it had never happened. What a cheap way to deal with his problems, but what choices did he really have? He was bound into a contract, at least that was his excuse.

The snow had stopped being a light dusting and morphed into a thick, heavy blanket, and a shiver slipped down Red X's spine as a gust of wind brushed past him. He'd been wandering around for almost half an hour at this point, and needed to head back to check on Raven. It probably wasn't the best idea to leave her alone when she was injured, but being around her would have been worse. So much worse.

"That fucking bitch. Who the hell was she?"

Red X stopped mid-step and listened to the hissing sound of pained speech. If Red X trusted his instinct, that must have been the idiot who attacked her. The sane part of his brain kept telling him to turn away and leave everything alone. Raven was going to be fine, there was no need to jump into the conversation. But then there was that stupid, chivalrous part of him that wanted to defend her. And he was listening to the slightly less intelligent part of his brain. What an idiot. Red X slid into the alleyway to his left, and pressed up against a wall next to a dumpster. He could see shadows and shapes slide across the dirty ground, but faces were hidden from view.

"That whore fucked up my leg."

This was _definitely _the idiot Raven had gotten into a fight with earlier. Red X finally noted the metallic, acrid scent of blood lingering with the pungent stench of trash and city snow. Whatever these punks had done to Raven, was nothing compared to what she did to them. He was stupid for still hanging around the scene of the crime. Oh well, one man's folly was another man's opportunity. Red X moved closer to them, waiting for an opening.

"I'm sorry, Chris. I just... I bolted." The second voice was nasally and childish, no older than fifteen. Red X craned his neck a little, trying to get a better view of the two, but they stayed hidden in the shadows. There was the sound of shuffling and then the stabbed thief tumbled to the ground. "We've got to get you to the hospital, dude."

"Hell no." He crawled to his feet. "They're gonna ask what happened, and what am I supposed to say to them?"

"Tell them you got in a fight, duh."

Red X rolled his eyes and rose to his feet. There was no point in reprimanding these two _geniuses, _their stupidity would do that for them. The one who stabbed Raven would probably lose his leg to gangrene if he didn't get it checked out. Not his problem. Red X shoved his hands into his jacket and started back to the hotel. No point in dirtying his hands tonight.

"What happened here?"

Red X stopped walking and whipped around, his body tensing up as his eyes searched the snowy darkness for familiar movement. He would know the voice anywhere. True, it sounded a bit harsher, more gravely than the last time he heard it, but there was no doubt in Red X's mind. Robin was here. That changed the game drastically. A shadow moved, and Red X saw someone step into the flickering light from a dis-repaired lamppost. At first he didn't recognize him. Robin's hair hung in lose locks around his face, and his brightly colored uniform had been traded in for darker blues and blacks. He looked... _different, _and felt even more so. Gone was the anxious hormonal teenager, jumping at every fight. He was now replaced by something that was a man, calm and collected, and _frightening_.

"Who the fuck are you?"

Red X shook his head. Even he knew not to poke the bear, that was just asking for a beating.

"That's a good question, but maybe you should answer mine first." Robin leaned back on his heels and stared at them. Red X knew that movement, it was like a sleeping cobra, just waiting for the first opening. The two thieves were probably stupid enough to give it to him too. "What happened here?"

"None of your fucking business. Get the hell out of here."

Red X wanted to walk away, he wanted to pretend he had never seen a thing and return to the shelter of the hotel room. But, like the curious idiot he was, Red X stayed pressed against the wall watching the scene as if it were some kind of television show. Robin stepped forward and in a matter of seconds, both the the hoodlums were hog-tied, and hanging from a fire escape ladder. Red X didn't even have time to blink before the whole situation changed hands. Robin stared at the two thieves from the perch of fire escape on the opposite building, his chilling white smile glinting like fangs in the light.

"My name is Nightwing. Remember it, just in case." And he was gone. Red X didn't even have the chance to speak up, and he had already disappeared. He wondered if it was a good idea to chase after him, but he had to check up on Raven. Swearing under his breath, Red X turned away from the struggling criminals to return to the hotel. His stomach felt weird, like he had eaten a whole cup of ice and it was slowly freezing him from the inside.

Logically, he knew this was good. It meant Robin was here, it meant that Red X and Raven were headed in the right direction. It meant he could take care of this agreement and return to his normal life, as if nothing had happened. He would never be bothered again. On the other hand, it meant that _whatever_ had suddenly developed between him and Raven would end, and he knew that too. If he was ever honest with himself, he would have admitted that was something he didn't want. Maybe it was good he was never honest with himself.

"Red X?"

He jerked and looked up from his reverie, staring into deep pools of plum. There was a moment when he felt his heart fall into the ice in his stomach, before anger reddened his vision. What in the hell was she doing out in the freezing cold? And without a jacket? "You need to be back at the hotel. It's fifteen degrees out here! What are you doing?"

Raven blinked once before her vision narrowed. "It's the hallway, and I came down it to get some ice." She snorted inelegantly and stumbled past him to their hotel door. Red X jerked again, feeling his head start to swim. When had he come back to the hotel? And why didn't he remember it? He rubbed his forehead and followed her into the room. All this thinking was seriously messing him up, things needed to go back to the way they were before: simple.

"Sorry... I just... I had an odd experience." Well, that was _one _way to put it. Red X tossed his coat onto his bed and watched as Raven tried to struggle out of her bathrobe. Every movement made her wince in pain, poor girl. "Here, let me help you." But before he could even inch forward, his hands brushed against her creamy, warm skin and he jumped away as if burned. There were another few seconds as they stared at each other again, flashes of their make-out session running through his mind. His fingers itched to touch her and he shoved them into his pockets, trying to keep them from doing something he would regret.

"Maybe... that's not a good idea..." Raven took a step back, glancing away from him.

"Um, maybe you're right." Minutes ticked by before he was able to look at her again. She had somehow worked out of her robe, and was crawling into bed. The morphine must have been taking effect, because her movements were slow and sluggish, and she didn't seem to be in as much pain. That was good.

More silence, something he was beginning to hate. Red X opened his mouth, trying to speak about what he'd learned, but the words seemed to catch in his throat, as if he didn't want to tell her what happened. Red X sighed and kicked off his shoes, frowning more at himself than anything else. He knew what was keeping him from telling her the truth, but he wouldn't admit it to himself. He's be good and dead before that happened.

As if she could feel the waves of energy weaving through the room, Raven rolled over on her side and stared at him on his bed. He looked down at her and she sighed, her eyes fluttering closed. "I'm sorry... for earlier. It was stupid and... well, just plain stupid. It won't happen again." Silence covered them, and she popped one eye open. "And, I wanted to thank you for what you did."

"Just... don't do it again." Red X leaned forward and put his arms on his knees. Raven shifted a little more, trying to get comfortable, and Red X finally blurted out that stupid sentence. The one he wanted to keep locked inside for just a little bit longer. "I found Robin."

Raven stilled. She looked at him, her eyes wide, and the whole room seemed to fill with a myriad of emotions. Shock, anger, frustration, surprise, sadness, as well as a million other feelings pressed against them, and Red X looked away. He should have kept his stupid mouth shut. "He was... he was being _Robin_. Reprimanding criminals and being the good, honorable person he is." Red X glanced back at her and raised an eyebrow. "You know, a _Titan_."

"You don't have to say it like it's an insult." Raven rolled her eyes, and the shock was broken. Red X watched as she pulled the covers up to her chin, letting her eyes close. She looked so innocent like that, but he knew better. Raven sighed and shifted again. "Well, now we know he's here, that's a good start. The next thing we need to figure out is how to catch him."

The idea came to him like a lightning bolt, the evil grin came shortly after. He might just give her a tasted of his own medicine. "I think I might know how."

Raven raised an eyebrow. "And that is?"

"You're going to have to play the part of the petty thief."

Both her eyes opened and she glared more than daggers at him, she cursed every single bone in his body, and everyone in all his dead relatives. "No. Way."

)O(

_Okay, so I lost my "Word" and I've been using GoggleDocs, which is okay. I like it, but it doesn't really function well as a usable subsitute for "Word" so if there are some messes and flubs, I'm begging you to let it slide. So, please leave a review, let me know what you think. I love to hear from you. _

_ALSO!! I have a blog? (Yes, you can laugh at me, it's okay), the link in on my profile page. But I am putting previews up at my blog, as well as my disurbed thoughts. But right now there is a very short preview of Little Blue Riding Hood_. _So, let me know what you think!_

With Love Always: Xaph!


	10. I am Warm

**Wide Awake  
**Chapter Nine: _I am Warm_

"I wave my hand and nothing happens  
I set my scene and I can't play it  
I'd leave it to you but  
It would turn out backwards."  
- _I am Warm, _Halou

)O(

Raven sat curled up by the window, staring at cars as they rushed by the hotel, throwing up snow at unsuspecting victims. Down the street, an upscale department store was blaring overly chipper Christmas music, and she began to wonder if it was possible to disconnect the speakers. Raven kept scanning the sidewalk, looking for familiar faces. For some reason, she kept expecting to see her companions running up to the hotel, waving and smiling at her. Nothing but gray slush, and brightly colored scarves. She knew it was pointless to expect to see them, she hadn't even called them in three days. Or, if you wanted to split hairs, she hadn't technically seen them in over three months.

Her heart turned over in her chest, and she sighed, thinking about her friends. Bruce had struck a nerve with her last night, she really needed to call them and let them know what was happening... but could she trust them? Could she trust them to help her find Robin? Or, more likely, would they just take her home, leaving Robin to fend for himself? He might have deserved it, but he was still her best friend, and she couldn't give up on him just yet. In spite of what her gut was telling her to do.

She sighed again and looked away from the street, resting her head against the cool glass. She watched Red X, who was sitting at the dinette set, diligently cleaning his equipment. His fingers moved deftly across the mechanisms as if he'd done the motions a million times before. The movements made Raven's mind wandered to their... _moment _last night and a blush covered her cheeks. What happened between them? Oh, that's right, she had made a _stupid _decision in her drug-induced state, and now things were _awkward._ Ugh. Only her.

"Something wrong?"

Raven jerked and looked over at him, trying to keep her face calm, shoving her rogue thoughts into the dark recesses of her mind, where they belonged. Red X was dismantling his grappling gun, looking at her with a mildly concerned expression. He had stopped bothering to hide his face from her, and his dark hair fell into even darker eyes. Raven wasn't going to deny that he was handsome, she might have been a superhero, but she was still a woman. And quite frankly, he was gorgeous. She turned away and looked back out the window. "No... not really..."

"Mm..." The room was filled with a few more minutes of metallic clicking as he cleaned and reassembled the grappling gun. Finally, he seemed happy with his work and stood up. Raven watched as he crossed the room to the coat closet. "Let's go grab lunch. I'm hungry."

"Okay." Raven stood up a little too quickly, and jarred her arm against the bureau next to the window. She hissed and stared at the bandage, which was starting to blossom with a crimson stain. She couldn't wait until her healing powers came back, this was getting annoying. How did humans deal with this all the time? "Damnit."

"Raven..." Red X shook his head and dug in his bag for more gauze. He found it and walked over to her, frowning. "Be careful or you're going to tear your stitches right out, and I don't want to put them in again."

Raven opened her mouth to snap out an argument, but decided against it. She didn't feel like fighting with him, not today anyway. "Sorry." Red X quickly cleaned and re-bandaged her wound. His rough fingers smoothed over his handiwork. They stared at each other for a few moments before looking away, both blushing and muttering apologies. Why did things have to be so uncomfortable between them now? It had just been a mistake, hadn't it? "Let's just go get lunch..." Raven pulled on her jacket, careful of her arm.

"Where do you want to go?"

Raven raised an eyebrow. "Does it matter?"

Red X smiled. "I guess not." They walked in silence, through the hotel, on the street, and meandered down the sidewalk, looking for some place to sit down and eat. Red X finally decided for them, dragging Raven into an Asian-fusion restaurant. Of course, a place where raw fish was considered good, and two sticks were considered utensils. The place was empty except for some business man chatting loudly on his cell phone in the corner by the window. Red X requested a table near the back, away from windows and prying eyes. Raven looked around, there were bright reds and golds decorating the walls, and popular Japanese song was playing over the speakers. In spite of her best efforts, Raven found herself humming along.

"I didn't know you liked this kind of music..." Red X laughed.

"I'm not all death-metal and goth-techno." Raven fiddled with her chopsticks, avoiding his inquisitive stare. "This song was blaring out of every shop when we were in Japan. It's annoyingly catchy."

"Ah." Their conversation was cut short as the waitress came over. She was a tiny little blonde girl with dimples and too much personality. Red X flashed her a smile and she tripped over her words before running off to get their drinks. Raven felt a small burning sensation in the pit of her stomach. She knew it shouldn't have mattered that he was flirting with their waitress, after all, they were just business partners.

So why did it bother her?

"Let's talk."

Raven jerked in surprise and stared at him, frowning. "About what?"

He raised an eyebrow, as if that was a stupid question. "About getting Nightwing to notice us."

Raven sighed and rolled her eyes. She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest, glaring. "I am not playing the part of a thief. Don't even think about suggesting it again."

"Oh?" His tone oozed sarcasm. "So then you must know how we can get a hold of him."

Raven glared. "You're _trying _to irritate me now, aren't you?"

He smiled, and the tension dropped. "A little." There was a small pause, and he stared at her. "It'll be a one-time thing. Something big enough to send off alarms, but small enough to avoid publicity. He'll come running to save the day, see his beautiful, gothic princess and your world will return to normal. And I'll get my reward."

"Don't ever call me a princess again." Raven fought the urge to punch him in the face, but his idea had merit. Robin was bound by his conscience to uphold justice and keep the innocent safe. If he got word of their heist, it would be a sure-fire way to bring him in, and back to Raven. She pressed a hand to her forehead and bit back a sigh. "You really think it's going to be that easy?"

"Honey." Raven glared at the name, but it didn't faze him at all. "I've been doing this for years without getting caught. We'll be fine."

"I thought we _wanted_ to get caught." She watched as his face fell, and there was a small part of her that basked in the win. Raven gave him a small, cruel smile. "Yes, X. You're going to have to get caught."

"You're going to break my streak." He sighed and leaned back in his chair. There was a small pause as he weighed the pros and cons of this sudden realization. Finally, he looked up at Raven and shrugged. "But, I guess there's no getting around it, now is there? I have an agreement with you and the potential reward is more important than than keeping my streak in play."

Raven just rolled her eyes and sat back in her chair. Silence fell over them again and she kept herself busy, playing with her chopsticks. Another song she knew came on and she kept humming along, wondering when their food was going to come out so she didn't have to bathe in this awkwardness anymore. Red X cleared his throat, and the sound made her look up. His expression turned serious as their eyes met and Raven felt her stomach turn cold. This was not good.

"Can we talk... about what happened?"

Not good at all. Raven felt her face turn red and she looked away. Why now? Everything was slowly starting to return to semi-normal. _Very _slowly. "I... thought we did."

"Not really." Red X ran his fingers through his hair, sighing. "I just don't want anything to upend this agreement between us." He glanced up at her before returning his stare to the chopsticks in his hand. "What happened was a fluke, you and I both know that. We had such strict rules before, black and white." Raven snorted. Since when was anything in _this _agreement black and white? It all seemed gray to her at this point.

"I..." Red X sighed again and looked at her, Raven felt color creep into her neck at his stare. Did he have to keep looking at her like _that_? Like she was some kind of mystical puzzle? "I like you, Raven... you're interesting and unique. The whole _reason _we're here together is because I was curious about you."

Raven didn't know what to say to that, so she kept silent, looking undoubtedly like a deer in headlights.

"I just need to know that when this is over, we're going to go back to the way things were before. Black and white, with a perfectly clear line drawn down the center." Red X shook his head and growled. "I'm not sure why I'm telling you this... probably to reaffirm the fact that I know what this agreement is now and where it's headed... I guess, I just want to be on the same page."

"Oh." That made no sense to her what-so-ever. Was he admitting he had feelings for her? Or that he didn't have anything at all? "I... guess I'm not exactly sure what you're telling me. Is this some kind of confession?"

Red X laughed and the cold sound sent shivers down her spine. He looked at her and shook his head. "No. Not really. I honestly think it was more to remind myself that I can't have this."

Raven swallowed a lump in her throat and stared at him. "Have what?"

"You." He waved around to the restaurant. "This. A normal relationship."

Raven cocked her head to the side. "And why not?"

His expression was so stern, so completely severe, that Raven thought her insides might go cold from his stare. She pulled back a few inches, waiting for him to finally say something. Her words weren't meant to be an offer, or even a suggestion. She was _genuinely_ curious. Why couldn't he have a normal relationship? In spite of his more obvious short-comings, Red X was a fairly decent man. He helped a woman in need, he was strong and brave, kind (although Raven wouldn't admit that to anyone but herself), smart, and good lord, he was _handsome _(another secret Raven would take to her grave). There was nothing to deter him from finding a good woman.

"Because, Raven. I'm a thief, and you know it." And that was the end of that.

Their waitress came with their meals, Red X flirted some more. Raven frowned and pretended to be more interested in her food. It was none of her business what he did, and he had made that perfectly clear by reminding her that they were nothing more than business partners. After this was over, they would return to their separate sides of the law. Raven sighed. It was for the best.

So, why did something ache inside her?

"You're not eating."

Raven shrugged as she looked up at her companion. "I'm not sure if I'm still hungry."

He raised an eyebrow. "Did I upset you?"

"I... I'm not sure." Raven pushed some vegetables around her plate. Red X opened his mouth, as if he was going to say something, but snapped it shut and returned to his meal. They fell into silence again. Silence was good, it kept a barrier between the two of them and that was what they needed. They couldn't afford to grow any more of a relationship. Their mishap last night was nothing more than that, not a stepping stone in... _this_.

They finished their meals and headed back to the hotel, still in silence. Raven took her usual spot by the window, and Red X sat down in the large armchair opposite of her, reading a book. And they was how they stayed for several hours. No sound. No conversation. That perfect barrier of silence. As if the whole world had crumbled around their ears, and there was nothing they could to about it. Raven watched the sky turn from gray to black, still looking for any signs that her friends would have a change of heart and come find her or Robin.

Robin... Raven sighed and leaned back into her chair. She had spent the entire afternoon letting her mind wander to all their memories together. The good ones and the bad. The moments she knew she would never forget, and the ones she wish she could. Every memory felt like a hot stab through her heart. She missed him, and that felt like an understatement. He was somewhere in the city, somewhere tormented by her disappearance, and she was unable to help him. She had never felt so helpless before.

"Worrying is not going to help us find him any faster." Red X didn't even look up. Raven watched as he turned a page, frowning. She tried not to glare at him, but she failed. "It's just going to make things worse." He glanced up at her before returning his gaze to the book. "And it's just going to make the pain worse."

Raven sighed and stood up, fidgeting. "I _know._ But I can't help worry about him. Is he safe? Does he need help?" She paused and looked over at Red X. "He's alone, without a way to communicate and playing vigilante. How am I supposed to feel? Robin has been known to make stupid decisions and we're left cleaning up. What if it happens again?"

"You've spent all afternoon thinking about him. Of course these feelings are going to be intense, but that doesn't mean they're truth." Red X, as if feeling her glare, snapped his book close and watched her pace around the room. "I told you, worrying is not going to help find him any faster." He sighed as she continued to move around the room. "You need a distraction."

"I _need_ to find him." She threw her pillows to the floor and pulled back the sheets to her bed, but she didn't get in. Instead she just walked around her bed as if trying to decide if she wanted to go to sleep or not. "I'm not sure how much more of this I can take."

"Well." Red X stood up and moved toward his side of the room. "We have a few options. If you want to go on the mission tonight we can, but you are in no condition to go out, and will probably bleed to your death, or catch gangrene. Or, we can deal with this like adults and realize that there is nothing we can do _right now_. You will be more helpful when you are healed."

Raven stared at her bandaged bicep, frowning. He was right, unfortunately. It was the sole reason they had not bothered to make a move just yet, and that thought made her mad. It was because of her stupidity and her carelessness that they had to wait. Raven growled and yanked at the bandage, ready to pull out the stitches if she had to. But there was no wound underneath the gauze. Raven stared at her arm, noticing a small, pink scar slicing across her bicep. A few flakes of dried blood fell off, but nothing fresh. Red X's mouth fell open a little.

"Your powers are..." He reached out and rand his fingers over her skin, tracing the jagged shape. "Does that hurt?"

"No... It just feels normal." She looked up into his face smiling. "I've got my powers back!" Raven moved to turn on the TV, but nothing happened. Her shoulders slumped and she sighed. "Well, I have some of them back. Clearly my telekinesis is not one of them."

"Some is better than nothing." Red X carefully examined her arm, lifting it and pinching it carefully. "Everything seems to have healed properly. That's good."

"So we can go?" Raven looked up at him expectantly, but there was a shadow of doubt behind his eyes and Red X shook his head.

"Not tonight. Tomorrow."

Raven frowned. "Why not."

"Because I'm concerned about what else could be happening here." He pressed a finger to her forehead and looked into her eyes. Raven cocked her head to the side, pushing his hand away.

"Nothing. You know that. Why would you even ask?" She watched him wince as if he'd been hit. It was like he said something he wasn't supposed to, and Raven caught his slip. Red X moved, trying to turn away from her accusing stare, but she snatched his arm and glared. Her stomach turned to led as she stared at his guilty expression. He _knew _something she didn't, and he had been keeping it from her the entire time they were together. "I can't even get into my own mind, Red X. How do you know what is going on in it?"

"I don't." He avoided her gaze and went to his side of the room.

"You do." Raven turned to him, growling. He didn't even bother looking up and just pretended to be preoccupied with something else. Raven wasn't buying the act. She jumped over her bed and approached him. "You know _exactly_ what is going on inside my head. You know what happened to me while I was unconscious. Why haven't you told me!"

Red X sighed and turned to face her, looking defeated. He fell onto his bed and looked up at her. "Maybe I do know something. What then? It's not going to fix anything."

"No, it won't _fix _anything, but it will help me figure this out." Raven could feel the anger starting to boil to the surface and she grabbed his shoulders, shaking him. He just sat there and let her. "What do you _know_? What have been keeping from me?" Raven sat down across from him, letting her head fall into her hands. "What happened to me?"

"I..." Red X looked away.

"You know!" Raven saw him look towards her and sigh. "Don't _lie to me_! You know what happened!" She threw a pillow at him, fighting the screams building inside her throat. It felt like every emotion she had been trying to hide, every _feeling_ from her "accident" and the events afterward were rising to the surface and she couldn't stop them. "What _happened _to me?"

"I don't know, Raven." Red X stood up and faced her. His hands were shaking, but she didn't care. He _knew _and yet he kept everything from her. All the pieces to her incomplete puzzle. "I swear! I only know what your mirror showed me."

"My... mirror showed you _what _exactly?" Raven's eyes narrowed and she watched him begin to pace.

"I'm... I'm not sure." He looked over at her but didn't stop pacing. "You were... hurt. In pain. Being torn apart from the inside out. Every minute of every day you were tortured." He turned away from her, shuddering at the memories. "You screamed and cried and yelled for help. You begged for it to stop, but it didn't But I couldn't help you. I didn't know how to make it stop."

"I was..." Raven fell to her bed and stared up at him, her heart turning cold with shock. She chewed on her lower lip, thinking. It was about that time in her life, as she left her teens her body grew into that of an adult, and for a demon it was a painful, excruciating process. She had been told that once by her mentor, but the story never seemed to stick.

"You were what?" Red X sat down across from her, trying to look into her eye. Raven turned away from him, blushing brightly.

"I was maturing."

Red X made a face. "_What_?"

"I was... coming of age? Growing up? Becoming an adult..." Raven ran a hand through her hair, letting out a long, slow breath. "There was nothing you could have done to stop it or to help me... it was explained to me once when I was a little girl, that I would have to grow up. It would be a painful, daunting process, and every part of me would be tested before I was allowed to wake." Raven's head fell into her hands and she felt tears start to gather in her eyes. Memories came crashing back to her, things she wished would have stayed locked in her subconsciousness. "I remember now... what happened. I remember what my weakness was."

Red X took a step towards her, but hesitated, bringing his hand back to his body. "Your weakness?"

Raven could feel the tears running down her face and she was helpless to stop them. "My mind attacked my greatest weakness. The one thing I desire most but cannot have." She shoved at her hair, trying to wipe the evidence of her emotions away.

"Which was what?"

Raven had no idea why she was telling him this, why her secrets were spilling out into the open. She had made it her life's mission to keep everything about herself locked up, away from prying eyes. And here she was, telling her secrets to a complete stranger. "I wanted Robin. I wanted everything he stood for. Justice. Humanity... Love." She glanced up at Red X, watching the surprise on his face. "I wanted him to love me."

)O(

Red X ran. He ran as fast as he could across the rooftops, listening to his breath move loudly in his lungs. The noise seemed to ease his splitting headache, but it didn't block out the echo of those heavy words. He knew that this was nothing more than a business understanding. He knew that he couldn't have her. But those words had speared something in him, and Red X knew for _sure _that he could _never_ have her. He could never be the man she wanted.

Was he okay with that? He would have to be.

He couldn't _be _Robin. Robin was good. He looked out for the weak and vowed to uphold the law, and all that other proverbial good-Samaritan bullshit. And even though he wandered on the darker side of the law, Robin still upheld the principles he knew to be true. That justice would always win, and the villains would always lose.

And he did. He lost the only battle he _really _wanted to win.

)O(

_Okay, so I know that after two months of down time you would think I would have a longer chapter. But I will be completely honest when I tell you that this is my _fourth _write of this chapter. I was getting more fed up with myself that I couldn't push it in the direction I wanted it. But I have now. And I'm glad. :)_

_The next chapter should be filled with all kinds of delicious angst and whatever else comes our heroes' ways. And, it will be longer. Promise.  
Ah, I have a new story out _**Plastic Jungle **_which is my first attempt at an AU story, so let me know what you think. I am also working on a one-shot with Raven and Red X called _**Animal**_ so, look for that soon. And, in case you didn't know, _**Honeythief **_won my poll for a sequel, so I will be working on a sequel for that. Expect sometime in July. Title is not yet known. Sorry._

_OKAY! After that winded AN let me know what you think. Thanks again!_


	11. Microphone

**Wide Awake  
**Chapter Ten: Microphone

Pushed by gravity, pulled by attractive force  
I met you by necessity  
I can't go against you, but just admire you  
I know that I'm not myself without you  
- _Microphone, _Ayumi Hamasaki

)O(

"Get dressed."

Raven was started out of her silence and looked over at Red X, but he couldn't quite meet her eyes. He kept his head down, avoiding even turning in her direction and potentially facing her. Raven sighed and rubbed her arms as if there was a draft, but nothing spilled from behind the window pane. What had happened between them last night was... uncomfortable to say the least. She had inadvertently confessed her darkest secret, the one "test" her demon side made her pass, to a stranger. To _Red X_. And now it was as if a larger rift had been growing between them.

Their previous days had been filled with conversation, it had been jovial, angry, annoyed, _anything_. But now... silence. Red X had barely said two complete sentences to her all day. Raven knew that this was a business understanding. They weren't friends, not even comrades, just business partners. She knew that when everything was said and done, they would return to what they were before. A Titan and an Enemy. That was just how the natural law worked and she needed to accept that. So, _why _did this silence hurt so much?

"Where are we going?" Raven pulled out her uniform and retreated into the bathroom.

"The museum is has a traveling exhibit of some of the crown jewels of Denmark. We're going to steal one of the coronation necklaces." Red X's tone was no nonsense, no teasing, no quips, nothing that would have normally come from him. Raven sighed and wiggled into her uniform, concentrating on the silence from the other room, Red X barely made a sound, even when they were planing a major heist.

Raven bit back another sigh and opened the door. He was sitting at the table, fidgeting with his grappling gun. He looked over at her, and Raven was unable to stop the blush that crept into her face at his stare. Something inside her stirred and she looked away, feeling a little sheepish. "Can we talk?"

"About what?" Red X returned to his grappling gun, trying to remain indifferent to everything. His voice was plain, no nuances or hitches. Almost as if he didn't care about her questions.

"This." Raven motioned to the space between them and stared. He looked up, putting his gun down and looking at her fully. "I don't understand what happened between us. Granted I _know _that we're just business partners, and that we can't be friends... but I..." Raven ran a hand through her hair, turning her face away from him. "I don't like whatever this is."

"Raven..." The sound of her name, rough and ill-honed, coming from his lips made her look up. His mouth was sewn with an expression of pain, and the intensity in his eyes made her take a step back. Whatever what going on between them was effecting him more than Raven knew, or he dared let on. "Do you want the truth, or do you want me to lie?"

That was a loaded question. If he had asked her ten seconds ago she would have screamed yes, but now, looking at the pain in his eyes, she wasn't sure if she could handle the truth. "I... I'm not sure."  
He gave short, serious nod and looked away, leaving Raven feeling like she had been punched in the stomach. "Then don't ask that question." There were a few more moments of silence, and then he handed her a grappling gun, still no-nonsense, as if that whole scene never happened. "Keep this on you at all times. And here's your revolver. I cleaned it for you this afternoon. Try not to use it, it makes too much noise."

"Alright." Raven holstered all the items she needed, and watched Red X do the same. He looked so smooth and unfazed by the world around him, like this was no big deal for him. But, then again, this was his profession and he knew how to do it well. "Let's go." He stepped outside of their hotel, and in the dead of night it reminded her of something out of a horror movie. "Luckily, I disarmed the hotel's security cameras this afternoon, so the only thing they'll see for the next three hours is a fuzzy, blue screen."

"That's good?"

"Yes, Raven... it means they can't pin anything on us if they can't see us." Red X looked down at her and ushered her into the stairwell, making sure the door closed securely behind them. "Come on, we've got ten minutes to get there and get situated. Then there will be a five minute break in security when the guard changes. That's the five minutes we use to grab one of the necklaces, I don't care which one take your pick, although I am partial to the sapphire one. When we're done, we get out of the museum tripping an alarm in the process." His dark stare bore into her. "Make sense?"

"Yes." Raven nodded, feeling her stomach suddenly bubble into her throat. Why did this suddenly feel like a terrible idea? She was going to steal a _coronation necklace_ from the _crown jewels of Denmark_. What was she thinking? This was asking for an international travesty!

"Follow my lead and you'll be fine, promise." Red X reached out and snagged her fingers. "Trust me."

Raven stared down at their hands and then back up at him. Their silence seemed to hang in the air, waiting for an explosion to happen. Red X just blushed and pulled his hand away, muttering an apology. There was a moment of awkward silence before he handed her something else, a small, black mask. "We're not concerned with disarming security cameras at the museum, because we want to be caught, but I would feel terrible if your reputation was tarnished. So, please keep this on."

"Oh." Raven put the mask on and blinked, looking over at Red X, whose expression was unreadable.

"It looks good." He reached up and readjusted the mask, bending down a little to look into her eyes. They stared at each other for a moment, letting the unsaid comments sit between them. Red X turned away, frowning. "You'll do fine, stop worrying."

Raven wasn't so sure about that. She sighed and took a step away, starting for the stairs. "C'mon, let's get this show on the road." Red X gave a short nod and pulled on his own mask, running up the stairs to the roof access. Raven heaved out another sigh and followed him onto the roof. Tonight was going to be a headache, she just knew it.

"It's cold." Raven looked over at Red X, who shrugged.

"It's winter, it's supposed to be cold."

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." Raven rolled her eyes and stepped closer to the edge of the roof. The museum was two blocks down, red banners and lights shining in the cold, December night. It was too far to go by normal conveyance, their black catsuits and masks would be a dead give away that they were up to something no good. Red X's bright idea was to avoid notice by keeping to the rooftops. To which Raven said a few _choice_ words and thoughts. Raven didn't necessarily trust her ability to _run _without her powers, let alone hurdle great distances like alleyways. But, what choice did she have? It wasn't like they could just pull up to the front door in the Lamborghini.

"You ready?" He looked over at her and Raven snorted.

"No, but I'll pretend just for you."

"Good. Let's go." Without another word, he took off across the pebbled tar. His steps were nearly silent, as if he had done this a million times before. Raven groaned and took off, feeling her muscles ache. Atrophy had pretty much destroyed most of her muscle tissue, and she tried to keep up with him, but it felt like a snail trying to keep up with a fox. Of course, it didn't help that her mind was lost in the silence between the two of them. The empty pauses and avoided stares. She should have focused on this like it was any other mission, but Raven was instead thinking and wondering. And not paying attention.

Raven managed to make the first two jumps without incident, but the third was a little farther than she had anticipated and her toes caught on the edge of the building. She bit the fall with most of her chest, and then tumbled head over heels across the tar, feeling the gravel dig into any exposed skin.

Not good. She skidded to a halt, cursing as blood ran down her left temple and into her eye. Pain ripped through her like razors through silk, and a small scream pierced the silence. It echoed off the sides of the buildings, signaling her companion that he needed to stop. She rolled onto her back, grunting as her body cracked and snapped under the pressure. That was worse. Raven coughed and tried to sit up, but her body wouldn't move. "Damnit."

"Raven!" Red X ran to her side, no longer concerned with stealth or speed. He slid across the gravel, falling to his knees and kicking up dirt. The air around them seemed to still as he stared down at her, carefully peeling the mask off her face. He ran his thumb over her cheeks, brushing off debris. "Raven, are you okay? Raven open your eyes."

Raven's eyes fluttered open and she stared up at him. Red lights pulsated behind him as the vents on the roof released clouds of steam, making the whole scene ethereal. Red X pushed hair out of her face, gently wiping blood from her eyes. His hands slipped under her head and pushed her halfway into a sitting position. "Does that hurt?" Of course it did! Raven just bit the pebbled tar with her _face_, how _couldn't _it hurt? Raven forced a broken smile and shook her head. She doubted Red X bought it, but it was worth a try. "Damnit, Raven... you have a penchant for getting into trouble."

"It's not exactly like I _intended _to kiss the pavement." Raven moved her arm carefully, testing it for any breakage. Bones were harder to heal than tissue. Everything seemed fine, so she sat up fully, holding her head as blood flowed through her bruised body. "Ow."

"Ow is right. Raven... You have to be more careful!" He sighed and shook his head, handing her a small pad with disinfectant on it. Raven started to wipe down the scratches on her face, watching him rise to his feet. "I should be mad about you throwing off our schedule-"

Raven glared and interjected before he dug his hole any deeper. "Our _schedule_? I almost fell to my death without my powers, and you're concerned with our _schedule_?" She snorted and threw the bloodied mess at him. "Some friend you are."

Red X jerked back. "Friend?"

Well, _that_ was a Freudian slip. Raven paled as their eyes met. The air felt colder all of the sudden, as something strange and unknown started to seep into the cracks between them. Is that what they were? _Friends_? Is that why she was upset over his nonchalance? Over the silence? Over the distant nature? Is that why she was upset over his flirting with the waitress? And most importantly, is that why she kissed him? She shoved her hair out of her face again and looked away. "Well, if we aren't friends then... what are we?"

"Business partners." Red X was readjusting his gloves, as if something inside them itched. He looked at her, and even though his eyes were masked, Raven could feel a dark seriousness in his stare. Something that couldn't be dismissed or forgotten. "I thought that was something we both agreed on."

"I..." Raven sighed and stood on her feet. Her legs felt shaky beneath her, but she would be damned if Red X saw it. That was the final seal on their agreement. "I wasn't sure... I guess I needed to be reminded."

Red X looked at her and shook his head. "Raven... now is not the time to be having the discussion..." Red X's speech fizzled out as his head tilted to the space behind her. What was he staring at? Raven turned just in time to see a dark shadow slide behind an air conditioning unit. "I think someone beat us to the museum."

"I think you might be right." Raven sighed and took a few steps forward. "Batman?"

"Perceptive." Batman slid from the shadows, his lips turned down in a perpetual frown. "Raven. I figured that might be you, there aren't exactly hundreds of purple-haired women clamoring across the rooftops at this hour." He paused and his gaze flitted behind her, staring at Red X for a moment. "If you don't mind me asking, exactly _what _are you doing in the dead of night on the rooftop next to the museum, which is housing the crown jewels of Denmark?"

Raven was unable to stop the blush from crossing her face. "Trying to catch Nightwing?" The statement somehow slipped out like a question, and that just made her look more guilty.

Batman cocked his head to the side. "Nightwing?"

"Robin." Raven shoved at her hair, eyes wandering down the street to the museum. This really _was _a bad idea. She glanced back at Batman and blushed again. "Red X said he saw Robin playing vigilante a few nights ago, under the alias of Nightwing." She let out short, abrupt sigh as Batman continued to stare at her. "We thought maybe we could coax him out with a threat... but clearly we caught you instead."

"Clearly." Batman shook his head and leaned back on his heels. "I don't normally see a pair of thieves running across rooftops, the sight caught my attention." He glanced back at Red X again. "Well... do you think it's going to work?"

Raven gave a one-shouldered shrug. "It's worth a try."

"And if it doesn't?" Batman still refused to move his stare from Red X, who was unusually silent, considering the conversation. Raven looked over her shoulder at him, but he stayed perfectly still, not even twitching to show he was alive and listening. "Will you return the item to it's rightful owner?"

"I'll make sure of it." Raven nodded curtly. "You can trust me."

"Well..." Batman took a few steps back, retreating into the shadows. He returned his gaze to Raven. "Carry on then. I'll check up with you in a while, Raven. Try not to cause too much damage." And he was gone, leaving only silence in his wake.

Raven heaved out a sigh as she whipped around to stare at her companion. "You were awfully quiet. I could have used your help."

"Sorry." He turned to look at her, tilting his head to the side. "Quite frankly, I was a little star-struck." Raven's mouth fell open and he shrugged. "I mean _come on_, it's _Batman_. And he met us on the roof. And he's letting me _steal_. How am I _supposed _to respond to that?"

Raven snorted and rolled her eyes. Sometimes she forgot is was kind of cool to have friends in high places, as well as convenient. She looked over at the clock on the roof of the museum and swore. "Look at the time, we've got less than five minutes before the guard changes, Red X, we have got to go or we'll have to scrub the mission for tonight."

"Look who's taking the lead." He reached up and rubbed the sore on her forehead, gently making sure it had healed properly. Even though she couldn't see his face, she felt a smile cross his lips. "Good job, Rae." Raven felt her heart skip a beat at the teasing nickname. Was he having a change of heart? That they were friends? Or... No, he made it perfectly clear that it was just a business relationship. He handed her the mask. "Let's go steal some priceless jewels."

"Isn't that your motto?" Raven put the mask on and grinned at him. For just a little while longer, she would pretend that everything was okay. Just to get this over with. "Let's go." And she took off across the rooftop, ignoring the way her bones creaked under the pressure. Her body hadn't quite healed from the fall, and every step and leap felt like fire running from her chest to her limbs. Raven jumped the space between buildings carefully, ignoring the ground ten stories below. Her feet slid against the ice covered concrete, and she had to grab onto a column to avoid smashing a window.

"Damnit." Red X managed to make the leap without too much incident, he did crash into Raven before regaining his footing. He muttered a rushed apology, and then went straight to the window behind them, carefully picking the lock. "The jewels' display room is one level below this one. There are cameras at every corner of the hall, so try to make sure they don't get a good shot of your face. Keep your head down, and they'll never get a sharp shot of your face." The window popped open. "Four minutes, Sunshine, think you can make it?"

Raven glared. "Don't ever call me sunshine again, Red X. And _yeah_ I think I can do it." Raven slid through the window and dropped down six feet to the marble floor below. The shock rippled through her muscles, but it wasn't too bad. The noise was what concerned her the most. Raven rose to her feet and took a few seconds to adjust to her surroundings. Gotham Museum was actually a beautiful building, filled with years of history and caramel colored marble.

Raven turned and pressed her face close to a display case housing a tribal mask from Tibet. It happened all of the sudden. She felt the ancient emotions and memories brushing against her senses, her stomach turned slightly with the pressure. This was bad, she hadn't anticipated this, and her miscalculation could botch this whole ordeal. Raven stumbled back from the display case, trying to catch her breath.

"You okay?" Red X had jumped through the open window, and landed next to her. He brushed hair out of her face and looked into her eyes. "You look pale."

"It's just the leftover emotions..." Raven pushed his hand away from her face, glaring up at him. The pressure in the room was increasing with Red X's own torrential thoughts an feelings. As if centuries of ancient history weren't enough, let's just throw hormones into the mix. That was just what she needed. "I'm fine. Let's just go."

"Okay." She could feel Red X frown at her, but he made no move to deter her decision. Which was probably a good move on his part. "Down this hall there is a flight of stairs, stay close to the right wall, and the cameras will avoid seeing your face fully. Come on." He took her hand and dragged her down the marble-lined hall. His footsteps were silent, but hers sounded like an elephant herd was trampling down the empty hallway. She was surprised the guards hadn't noticed yet. They kept close to the right wall, and at the bottom of the stairs, Raven saw the shadow slide across the floor.

"Security." She moved closer to Red X, who backed up one step, stilling. Pressed against each other like that, Raven noticed the smell of oil and anise coming from Red X. It smelled like cold nights and adventure, and something in her stomach turned again. Not good. She tried to keep her thoughts from wandering, but it was too late, and she was pretty sure she heard a sconce shatter two floors above them. They stayed close for a few seconds before Red X slid forward, turning slightly to look at her.

"Come on." And they took off down the hall, towards the display room at the end. The doors were still thrown wide open, as if visitors were going to come any minute to gawk at the jewels. The room was carpeted in deep blue, and painted in the colors of the Danish royal family, and the rest of the room was filled with giant laminate boards talking about the types of jewels, where they were mined, the history behind them. There, in the far back of long hall, sat the sparkling glass cases.

Red X was standing in front of the sapphire necklace, staring at it. As if feeling her eyes on him, he turned to face her. "I told you, I was partial to this one."

"Well..." Raven joined his side, her steps finally quiet on the plush carpet. "Do we take precautions and be gentle... or do we just go for the gusto?"

Red X laughed. "What do you think?" He reached back and pounded his fist through the case. The glass shattered around his glove, tripping the alarm. His fingers wrapped around the necklace and pulled it free. "I think that's our sign to go."

Raven shook her head and followed him out of the room. "You might be right. For once."

)O(

Nightwing sat on the edge of the building, looking down at the streets below. His soul felt calmer now, quieter, no longer raging inside at his loss. But in return, his heart felt empty. There was a giant void that he needed to fill and he wasn't sure how to do it. He ran a hand through his hair, sighing.

If he was honest with himself he might have admitted he missed his friends, but Nightwing didn't want to travel down that path. Not yet. They must have been angry with him, and they every right to be. Nightwing had just picked up and left, leaving them with a city to defend and a sick Titan to heal.

Raven...

Damnit.

Nightwing promised himself that he wouldn't go there. Wouldn't let his mind wander to a place he could not travel. He managed to regain control of his emotions and thinking about her would only damage everything he built. All the barriers and compartments to keep him relatively sane. But still...

He loved her. She was the whole reason he fell into this blackness, he couldn't take the idea that he didn't protect her. That he didn't save her. That she was left to hide in herself. He loved her, and yet he couldn't save her.

Nightwing felt tears collect in his masked eyes, and he blinked them away. Now was not the time. He had a city to save. A town to protect.

Somewhere in the distance, he heard an alarm screech to life.

)O(

_I have been dying to use that song FOREVER it just hasn't fit yet, and now it does YAY!  
Okay, in case you do not know I am at an impasse. I am, along with I think most of my readers, torn between Red X and Robin. So, what else was there for me to do but put a poll on my profile page. Please visit there, and give me your suggestion. I can go either way from here, but once I start, I can't go back. So, choose wisely. _

_Anyway! Thank you for reading and please leave a review before you vote!_


	12. Strange Love

**Wide Awake  
**_Chapter Eleven: Strange Love_

"There'll be days  
When I'll stray  
I may appear to be  
Constantly out of reach  
I give in to sin  
Because I like to practice what I preach"  
- _Strange Love,_ Depeche Mode

)O(

Raven stared at the shapes her breath made in the cold air.

Three hundred eighty four… three hundred eighty five… three hundred eighty six…

The necklace felt like dead weight on her arm, dragging her body down to the snow-covered tar. The world below them had erupted in a storm of emotions, shouts, screams, and sirens, as everyone within a five mile radius seemed to notice that some of the crown jewels were missing. Well, everyone except the _one_ person they wanted to find. Raven fell into the snow, tucking her legs beneath her. No one, however, seemed to notice the two thieves standing on the roof, watching the chaos.

Four hundred nine… four hundred ten…

"He's not coming is he?" Raven sighed and let her head fall against the air conditioning unit behind her. Snow ticked off the frosted metal, and was the only sound on the rooftop. She stared at the sapphires in her hand, watching them sparkle blue rainbows into the darkness surrounding her. "All that work and for what? So, he can just stand me up?" She threw the necklace at Red X who caught it deftly before joining her in the snow.

"I'm sorry." Red X fiddled with the jewels, eying their cut at clarity. For the first time, the jewels didn't seem to hold any interest for him, and he put them away, pretending they were never there. He sighed and looked over at Raven. "I really am."

"Yeah, well sympathy isn't going to fix anything thing." Raven sighed again, pulling her knees to her chest. She hated feeling so helpless, but more importantly, she hated feeling like she had failed. There was nothing that could have changed the outcome, and she knew that, but it still felt like she hadn't done enough. Like she could have done more to find Nightwing. That even the littlest change would have somehow attracted Nightwing to them. But, _nothing_ would have changed. He was still out in Gotham and Raven had no way to find him. All their ideas were exhausted.

Raven coughed, feeling a tightness in her throat and warmth on her cheeks. Oh no. She was going to cry if this didn't stop right now. Taking a deep, shaky breath, she let it out slowly, trying to calm herself before the worst happened. "I should have known this wasn't going to work."

"It was worth a try anyway." Red X, as if sensing her emotions, reached over and grabbed her hand. Raven's heart hiccupped, and she stared at his hand for a second before snatching it away, rolling her eyes. Red X was unfazed by her attitude. "So, should we try Plan B?"

Raven snorted and looked back at him. "Do we even have a Plan B?"

"Well, we can start to become serial thieves… you know, leave horribly obvious clues everywhere we go. That ought to attract Wonder Boy like…a…" Red X stopped talking under the death-glare he was given. Which was a good thing, because if he kept talking, Raven would have half a mind to kill him. Shaking his head he stood up and offered his hand to Raven. "I'm just saying, Sunshine, it could be an option if nothing else comes up."

"Are you asking me to stoop to your level?" Raven stared up at him, raising an eyebrow.

Red X cocked his head to the side and put a hand on his chest, faking pain. "_Stoop_? I'm hurt you call it that. I'd call it more like… bowing down to my level."

"Bowing?" Raven shook her head, fighting back a smile. "Well, regardless of what you call it, I'd much rather not steal from innocent people again." She dusted herself off of snow and stood up.

"Innocent?" Red X snorted and turned to face the museum. Although his face was hidden, Raven could feel the surge of him emotions bubble to the surface. "You think that _they_ are innocent? You'd be surprised how greedy and disgusting some of those stupid museum owners are. They, unfortunately, are most of my clients, and they are always trying to steal exhibits from one another. Who has the best artifacts? And so on and so forth. It's just disgusting… and don't even get me started on the history of Denmark, and their…" Red X paused as he noticed Raven glaring at him. "What?"

"Sometimes I am seriously concerned for you. You act as if you are only in the job for the money, and yet you have such passionate feelings." She shook her head and sighed. "Why bother stealing if you are so against the people you work for?"

"Because they pay my bills. Of course."

"Ah. I see it all so clearly now." Raven cocked a hip to the side, and felt Red X's stare follow the line of her body, outlined in the dim red lights of the city. She fought against rolling her eyes again. Did he have to be so painfully obvious sometimes? "Regardless of _anyone's_ past, it was not ours to take. And even though we had relatively honorable intentions, the point is that _it was not ours_."

Red X sighed and shook his head. "Yeah yeah. Spare me your commentary on ethicality, I get the picture. Come on, Sunshine, let's get going. We might as well return this stupid thing."

Raven turned and stared at him, feeling her mouth drop open. Did the thief have a sudden change of heart? Was he trying to do good in some way? Even though the royal family of Denmark was a bastard and museum curators were douchebags? Raven blinked, cocking her head to the side. "You don't want to keep it? I mean... out of everyone I know, you would be the first person to defy Batman's orders."

Red X laughed. "That may be true, but there is no way in hell I'm going to hold on to this thing." Red X snorted and pulled necklace out to look at it. It caught the light from the city and tossed it around the darkness. "It might be worth a small fortune, but this item is hot, and everyone within a hundred light years knows it's hot, which means there'll be zero buyers. There's nothing I can do with a necklace that no one wants. How am I supposed to make a profit off of that?"

So much for the change of heart. Well, what did she expect from a thief after all? Raven shook her head, fighting a smirk that was threatening to form. "Heaven forbid you grow some morals or something."

Red X pretended to look hurt. "I'm ashamed you would think so poorly of me. I have outstanding morals, you know. I mean, after all, I did save a dying girl from taking a terrible tumble off a roof."

"Ah, is that what you call it? Saving? You wouldn't just call it 'protecting your assets'?" Red X just chuckled in response. Raven snorted and pushed past him to the edge of the roof, closer to their hotel. There was no point in hanging around in the cold if they were just going to bicker. They could do that in the warmth and comfort of their own hotel room. Raven grabbed the necklace from his hands and stared at it. "Well, I guess we might as well head back to the hotel. If Nightwing hasn't shown yet, I doubt he will."

Red X seemed to pause and Raven looked at him through wisps of her plum hair. He fidgeted before turning away from her. "You really want to go? I mean… he's bound to show up soon, right?"

"We've been out here for almost three hours." Raven ran a hand through her hair, feeling a sinking feeling in her stomach. Robin was very peculiar when he investigated, he was either first on the scene or last. If he was first, it was because he was eager to collect all the clues he could before the correct authorities came and messed everything up. If Robin was last, it was because he was picking up the pieces of what everyone else missed. She sighed. This was a "last" kind of situation. "There isn't a snowball's chance in hell that he is coming any time soon. So… let's just go back to the hotel and grab some sleep. We'll figure something else out tomorrow."

"If that's what you want." Red X followed her to the edge of the rooftop, looking down into the alley with her. In some twist of sinister coincidence, it was the alley where Raven had been stabbed, and the alley where Red X had first seen Nightwing. The sight made Raven seriously question what she was doing. If Robin was more interested in playing vigilante, more interested in running from his responsibilities, then why was she bothering to find him? What was the point if he didn't even want to be saved? The thought seemed to skirt at the darkness of her mind, playing tricks on her.

Raven could feel Red X turning to look at her and she held up her hand, silencing anything he might say. She didn't want him to give her any of his comments, she didn't need them. This was something she needed to figure out herself, and he knew that. But, leave it to Red X to keep talking even though he wasn't wanted.

"He needs you, Raven. Don't give up."

She sighed and looked over at him. Why did he have to be so damn observant? "I know, you keep telling me that."

"Just part of the many services I offer." He offered her his hand. "Come on, Sunshine. It's almost dawn and I'm tired so you _must_ be."

Raven snorted and took a few steps back from the edge of the building. She was going to need a running start if she was going to make the jump. She did _not _want a repeat of last time. "I don't need your help, but thanks for the offer."

"Then why did you hire me?"

"I'm still trying to figure that out myself." She flashed him a coy smile and started across the rooftops.

Red X laughed and shook his head before following her.

)O(

Richard Grayson was completely inconspicuous surrounded by the people in the café. He looked like every other young adult swarming around the place. To his left sat three law students doing some in-depth project and behind him there was a table of hipsters talking about Nietzsche as if they had actually read his work. He rolled his eyes and returned to the computer in front of him. His hands shook from sleep-deprivation, but that couldn't stop him, he was so close to breaking through.

He'd been working all night to hack into the museum's camera network, trying to get a glimpse of the potential criminals who stole the crown jewels last night. Gotham city police department seemed to keep saying it was just an average criminal, but Richard has his doubts. Something about the heist seemed so… _off. _The criminal had taken such meticulous measures to avoid leaving any kind of evidence that he or she had ever entered the building, but then _broke_ a display case? Not to mention that Batman was conveniently on the other side of the city at the moment the jewels were stolen. It just didn't _feel_ right.

Richard cursed as he hit another firewall in the security cameras. This would have been a hundred times easier with Cyborg here. He would have been able to hack into the system in ten minutes flat. Richard sighed and took another deep gulp of now cold coffee, trying to fight off the demons that were still lurking at the dark corners of his mind. That was a place he didn't need to venture. He had already burned that bridge nearly two weeks ago, and pretending that it wasn't still smoldering would have been a lie. But that didn't mean he couldn't avoid it.

"Another refill, sir?"

He jumped and looked up into a pair of dark brown eyes and a bright smile. Ugh, _her. _That waitress had been flirting with him all night and he was getting sick of it. But his cup _was_ empty… damnit, that meant he'd have to talk to her. He gave what must have been an awkward smile and nodded. "Yes, please." And she poured his cup to the brim, smiling and chatting on about the weather and a party she'd gone to last night. Richard really wished she'd just shut up.

"Oh! Did you hear about the museum? It got robbed!"

Richard cringed under her poor grammar, but forced another smile. "Yes, I did hear something to that extent. The crown jewels of Denmark, correct?"

"Oh, I don't know. I just heard it got robbed." There it was again. "Well, I guess I'll be off, let me know if you need anything else!" Ha! Yeah right, she could just stay over there next to the hipsters and leave him alone. Richard just gave her a curt nod and turned back to the computer, working diligently on this firewall. Another hour passed, the hipsters had finally moved from Nietzsche to Swift, and Richard was ready to punch one of them in their faces. Those glasses didn't even have lenses for crying out loud!

Success.

Richard jerked a little under the surprise. He'd been working so hard for so long, he was beginning to lose hope of actually getting into the goal. Cyborg would have been proud that he'd taught Robin so well. Richard sighed and leaned back into his chair, reveling in his success for a few moments. There the whole list of cameras and all he had to do was chose the one he wanted. North second-floor corridor. Richard fidgeted with the settings and time stamp until he got the image he was looking for. He saw one thief drop and then the second. They had barely made a sound on the marble floor, even on impact. Richard tried not to growl, this just didn't seem _right_.

The first thief moved just slightly, just enough to banish the shadows on her face. Richard felt his stomach drop to the floor as she turned again. He knew that angular face, those wide eyes, and small, smirking mouth. It was Raven. She turned to the second thief and said something inaudible, and he shook his head in response.

There was a moment of feeling suspended and weightless, and then Richard got the sensation of being free. Like a rubber-band that had been stretched taut for too long, and then finally released. His hands shook and his heart beat erratically against his ribs. She was safe. She was alive. She was here. A million questions flew through his mind at the same moment: When had she woken up? What happened to her? Did the others know she was here? Were they here too? Was she safe? But most importantly… why was she stealing? And what in all of hell was she doing with Red X?

The video continued to play the scene out and Red X moved his face toward the camera, as if he knew who was watching on the other side. Richard felt a storm of emotions bubble into his chest. What were they doing? What was _Raven_ doing? Everything seemed to turn on its ear and the world tumbled around him. There _had_ to be an explanation for this. There had to be a reason. He needed to find her.

Richard slammed his computer shut and threw it in his bag, leaving an overly generous tip for the waitress. He stormed out the door to his motorcycle, trying to formulate a plan of action. But he couldn't think straight, and he barely remembered how to start his motorcycle. She was here! She was awake! But, where was she? And why had she seemingly switched sides? His hands shook with emotions, and his mind wandered. Twice he nearly slid into a snow bank, and he ran a red light on Second Street. He tried desperately to think logically, but normalcy escaped him and his body moved of its own accord.

Richard slid to a stop in front of the museum, staring up at its façade. Taking a deep breath he managed to calm down enough to think. He knew that she and Red X had entered through a window near the roof, which meant that she had to travel across the roof tops. Good, that was at least a place to start. Richard pushed his motorcycle into an alleyway and peeled off his jacket. Underneath sat his Nightwing uniform, the darker colors seemed to fit him well enough, but would Raven recognize him? Would she remember him? Did she remember anything at all?

His stomach churned and Nightwing pushed those thoughts to the back of his head. He had to find her first, that was his main priority. Worrying could always happen later. He climbed a fire escape to the roof next to the museum, a police officer who was supposed to be guarding the window, was instead taking a nap next to a ventilation duct. Nightwing shook his head. Well, so much for asking questions. He sighed and looked out across the rooftops. Raven would need a place to stay, and it would need to be close. But where?

The Crowne.

Of course, if she was with Red X that meant they would be playing by his rules. And Red X had a certain standard of living he liked to keep up with, regardless of the situation. Nightwing took a few steps back from the edge, ready to jump across the alleyway.

"Going somewhere, Boy Wonder?"

Nightwing lost his balance and nearly fell into the alleyway. Damnit. He whipped around and stared into that familiar mask. He could just _feel _Red X smirking behind it, and it made his blood boil. Fine, let him think he had the upper hand. Nightwing would give him that luxury for now. "I'm looking for you, actually… I saw your work at the museum last night."

"Ah. Not one of my finest moments, but luckily I have a good excuse." Red X turned to stare at the Crowne, before glancing over at Nightwing. "Did you happen to see my help for the evening, Robin?

Nightwing frowned at the name, the sound brought up too many painful memories. "I did. Where is she? What did you make her do? What…" He stopped when Red X held up his hand. Cheeky bastard. Nightwing felt his muscles tense under the strong desire of physical violence, but he couldn't hit Red X. He'd just managed to control himself, and acting out in anger would destroy everything he worked to rebuild. "What do you want for her?"

Red X seemed surprised by this and jerked slightly. "Are you going to pay for her like a possession?"

"Like a hostage. Isn't that what she is, Red X?"

"Not at all." He took a few steps back, as if sizing Nightwing up. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back on his heels, staring. "We have a business agreement, and she's free to leave it at any time. She is not a prisoner."

"A business agreement…?"

"She needed an expert to track down a missing leader."

That hurt. Nightwing winced under the inflection in Red X's voice. The connotation of "what if". He knew he should have never left, but hearing it from a wanted criminal made the guilt even heavier. Raven had no one else to turn to, and so she went to Red X? The world really had turned on its ear in his absence. Nightwing shook his head and choked back a shred of angry laughter. "So, she came to _you_? What about our friends?"

"No one came when she woke, _Nightwing_." Red X started to paced around him, and Nightwng could feel accusation pour out of him. "Everyone abandoned her. Beast Boy, Cyborg, even Starfire decided she needed time away. But you were the first to leave her. So, answer me, who could she have turned to?"

"I couldn't stay! And you knew that! You saw me that night I left Jump." Nightwing hissed a curse.

"Yeah? And Raven? Was she just a hindrance to you? Too much of a hassle to deal with?"

"Shut up! You don't know what you're talking about!" Nightwing took a step back from his nemesis.

"She came here looking for you!" Red X tossed the stolen jewels at him and Nightwing just barely caught them. He stared at Red X, frowning. He didn't seemed concerned with the tension and continued to speak. "She has braved every hell she could think of just to find you! And all I can think about is _why_? What's the point in worrying about _you, _when you don't even have the ability to sit next to her bed and hold her hand? You just _gave up_."

"I…" Nightwing stared at him, fighting the storm of emotions inside him, wanting desperately to lash out at him. Why was Red X so upset? It was just another job, just another form of payment. So, what about this particular situation was so important? Unless… Nightwing choked on the thought. How much had changed in his absence? "You love her, don't you?"

)O(

_Sorry it's been a while. I've been a little preoccupied unfortunately, as I will be getting married next week. Not like that's a good excuse or anything. Anyway, I think there'll be one more chapter and an epilogue probably. next story to be updated will be **Unreliable Narrator** if any of you are reading it, just FYI. Please, leave a review. I love to hear what you think!_


	13. Towards the Sun

**Wide Awake  
**Chapter Twelve: _Towards the Sun_

The water is cold  
And heavy on my mind  
I dreamed of walking with you  
But I fell behind  
Looking for a rose  
I could not find  
- _Towards the Sun,_ Alexi Murdoch

)O(

Shock crossed over Red X's face, followed by red anger, confirming Nightwing's observations. His stomach dropped at the thought. The notion that he had failed, that someone else had protected Raven when he had been too scared to, broke him into pieces. His heart pounded against every organ in his body, screaming at him, telling him to both run and fight. But like an idiot, he did nothing more than stand there.

"You really are just plain dense, aren't you?" Red X threw the necklace at him, and Nightwing caught it out of some deft habit. He stared at the blue sapphires, catching the dim, slanted light streaming between the clouds. The color was Raven's favorite, and she would have appreciated the item for everything it was: beautiful, historical, and interesting.

Red X shook his head and started for the edge of the building, fists clenching and unclenching. "It doesn't really matter if I love her, now does it? No, it doesn't matter, because she loves _you_, the idiot who failed her in every aspect of the word. You couldn't even be man enough to sit next to her bed, to tell her everything was going to be okay. But she _still_ loves you." He snorted. "Isn't _that_ some kind of sick, poetic justice?"

"She…" Everything in Nightwing's world seemed to focus to a point. What had happened after Raven's illness didn't seem to matter. What he did to her didn't even matter. He'd find a way to make amends, and he would do everything in his power to right the wrongs he had caused, because she loved him. "Loves me?"

"Unfortunately." Red X snorted again and took another step back. "Look at you! I mean… seriously? You break her heart, leave her to the destruction in her mind, run away to play vigilante… and after all of that, she _still_ loves you. Hunts for you. Cries in her sleep about you. And _why_? Because you two hold some 'special bond' bullshit." He shook his head and moved closer to the edge of the building. "You're a fucking idiot. And you don't deserve her."

Red X's words hit their target and Nightwing felt his muscles give under their weight. His head hung low, as if someone was yanking on his neck, trying to pull him down into the ground. "I know." He felt Red X's eyes on him and looked up. "You think I don't _know_ that? You _think_ I don't have any _clue_ as to what I did to her? To my friend? The one girl I love?" Nightwing threw the necklace back at Red X, and he winced with the force of the impact. "Do you think that I feel like I made the right decision? Leaving Raven to whatever held her trapped in that bed? Well, _I know_! I know what I did, and that doesn't make it any more right or fix any of the problems I caused… But I'm going to try to fix it."

"Fix the mess you caused?" Red X stepped closer to Nightwing, and the volatile emotions erupted between them. "This is all your fault!"

"I know."

Red X stared at him, still shaking. "Bastard."

"I _know_."

"Then go chase after her." Red X sneered, fingers clenching the necklace so hard it threatened to break. "Go _fix_ everything and be the _hero_. Her hero. The thing I couldn't be!"

"I will." Nightwing pushed past the thief and ran across the rooftops to the ornate façade Plaza in the distance. He felt Red X's stare follow him across the line of buildings, cursing him for everything he did and didn't do. Right now, none of that mattered. Raven was here and he had to repair the rift he caused.

His breath echoed in his ears, getting louder with each step until it felt like the whole city could hear him run. Pebbles sounded like boulders crushed under his weight, and the cold wind bit at his exposed skin, stinging with every step. In the distance he saw the peeling paint of the rooftop access door. It stood tall and heavy, looking like a giant maw opening wide enough to swallow him. He slid to a stop on the roof, returning the door's stare.

Words and sounds echoes through him, and his conscience whispered the terrible things he had done into his ear. As much as it pained him to admit, Red X was right. He had left Raven because he'd been too scared of what he was like without her. Of what he was becoming. Of life _without_ her, and what that would mean for him. He was selfish and childish, and he knew that. But it wasn't until now that he realized that he had taken his feelings out on Raven. She was not to blame for his inability to cope, and yet she was his main target. Nightwing ran a hand through his hair trying to calm the sickening feeling in his stomach. It was all his fault.

Taking a deep breath he pulled open the door and stared inside. Raven stared back at him eyes wide with surprise and arm poised as if she were going to turn the handle. Time halted.

"Robin…" Her voice was husky and breathy, everything he remembered. Nightwing stepped forward and pulled her against him. Warmth erupted in his chest and he trembled under the weight of emotions. She was here, alive and awake, but most importantly, she was in his arms. He hadn't completely failed her yet. There was still hope. Raven's slender fingers wrapped around his biceps, digging into the muscles. "You're here…"

"Please… tell me you're real. Tell me you're really here and this isn't another nightmare." His hands rubbed up and down her back, memorizing the shape of her spine, the noise she made when he touched her waist, the smell of lavender and cold Kevlar. He closed his eyes, letting the sensations wrap around him, and felt something warm and wet soak his uniform. Nightwing looked down at her. Raven was crying… _for him_. After everything he had done to her, after nearly losing his sanity, after abandoning her to whatever plagued her… she was still crying for him. Guilt seized his bones. "I'm so sorry, Raven… I thought you… and I… and… I'm so sorry."

She looked up at him, eyes watery and narrowed. "You should be, you big idiot."

Nightwing was unable to stop the smile from crossing his lips. Regardless of everything, she was still here. "I really am."

Raven pulled away and wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. "What are you doing here? How did you find me?"

"You left some pretty obvious clues…" His broken smile disappeared and he took a half step forward, closing the space between them. "As for what I'm doing here… Raven… I ran." He watched as her wide eyes stared at him, lips trembling with a torrential storm of emotions. "Damnit, Raven… I was scared of what had happened to you, of what I was without you, and like some stupid coward… I ran. I didn't want to face what I was becoming without you."

"Oh…" Raven blinked a few times. Her shock softened into understanding and she raised one soft hand to cup his cheek. "I know… I heard… and while I cannot say I understand, I know that whatever happened to you was beyond yourself… Robin…" The name coming from her lips made him shudder, made him remember who he was. He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. "I don't blame you. I could never blame you." She leaned on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck. "It's not your fault."

Nightwing's eyes flew open and he stared at her. Forgiveness. She was giving him the one thing he'd been looking for in his ridiculous Nightwing persona. The one thing he wanted most from her, that his mistakes were not unforgiveable and that he was not forsaken. Relief rushed through his body, and the words were on his lips before he had a chance to stop them. "I love you."

She smiled softly, color creeping across her face. "I know."

"Good." Nightwing leaned down and captured her lips in a searing kiss.

)O(

Nightwing stared at the doors to the mansion in front of him. For some reason they reminded him more of a mausoleum than a home. Like a tomb for all the memories he had buried here. Raven stood calmly next to him, staring straight ahead, never blinking. He shifted a little more, trying to understand why he agreed to this. He'd caused so much pain between his friends and between him and the few people he regarded as family, that he wasn't sure if the bonds were repairable. What if they wanted nothing to do with him after all of this time? What if this was just pointless?

Raven glanced over at him, shaking her head. Her dark eyes swept up to meet his and something in Nightwing's chest skipped. "You cannot get forgiveness without asking for it, or offering an apology in return. No one ever said this was going to be easy." She glanced back at the doors. "And might I remind you that this was your idea?"

Nightwing felt the smirk peel across his lips before he had a chance to stop it. After all that time and nothing had changed about her. She was still snarky and a little bit rebellious, but most importantly, she was standing next to him, supporting him. And that was what he needed most. Nightwing leaned down over her and kissed her gently. He felt Raven's blush warm his face before she returned the kiss. She was still uncomfortable with what was between them, but Nightwing could be patient for her. After all, she saved him, so he could do anything for her.

The front doors creaked open, shedding warm light onto the snow. Nightwing looked up into the steely face of his benefactor. There was a long, awkward pause before Bruce ran down the steps, stopping in front of Raven and Nightwing. Time floated by where seconds felt like hours and minutes turned to days. Finally, Bruce spoke. "You're safe."

Nightwing gave a broken smile. "I'm sorry… this was all my fault and I know that… I just want to know that nothing between us is irreparable. I just want… forgiveness…" He felt Raven's fingers thread between his and squeeze just a little, offering support. His mind seemed to calm, as her touch soothed him. He felt like he could do anything in the world, as long as she was beside him. "I'm so sorry… I never meant to hurt you, and I never meant any of the things I said."

"I know." Bruce stepped forward and wrapped him tightly in his arms, as a father would have embraced a son who had run away. "I'm sorry too."

Next to him, Nightwing could feel Raven's smile. She was right. He needed to fix all the wrongs he caused. It wasn't going to be easy, but it would be the best thing. He needed all of his friends and family the same way he needed Raven.

)O(

Raven woke up to soft breathing next to her head and warmth pressing against her back. She shifted just enough to see Robin, arms wrapped around her, deep in sleep. Probably the deepest sleep he'd had in some time. He mumbled something unintelligible and rolled on to his other side. Although nothing inappropriatehad happened between them, Robin refused to sleep without her by his side. It was as if he believed something terrible was going to befall them again, simply by her sleeping in another room. Reluctantly, she agreed.

Nights next to him, she discovered, were rather nice. He made her feel safe and protected. He made her feel loved, and that was more than she could ever wish for.

Outside the snow ticked against the window panes, piling up on the balcony. Raven watched the gray of early dawn mingle with the stark white of the snow until the colors melded together and became indistinguishable. Heaving a soft sigh, she scooted out of the bed and walked into hall. Wayne Manor was silent; Bruce had left earlier in the morning for the city, which left only Alfred and the occasional maid.

Two nights ago they had come back to Bruce, Robin wanted to make amends. There had been a few awkward tears and painful words exchanged, and then hugging. All kinds of hugging. Much to Raven's chagrin. It was good though, it was a step in the right direction towards repairing the bonds that Robin had broken over the past few months. In time, things would be returned to some semblance of normalcy, and that was all she really wanted. Everything was going to be okay in the end. But still…

Raven rubbed her upper arms as she meandered down the hallway, staring at the patterns in the carpet. It still felt as though she were missing something, or rather _someone_, in her life. Things just felt kind of _empty_ without him there, playing the part of a snide, devilish, rouge. Raven sighed. But his part in this portion of her life was complete, and there was nothing that could change that.

"Miss Raven?"

Raven started, surprised by the sound, and then smiled into Alfred's weathered face. "Good morning, Alfred. How are you?"

"Well… I am quite fine, however…" His eyebrows knitted together and he glanced toward the entry foyer. Raven looked around the staircase to see the door cracked open a few inches, letting snow inside. "There is a young man outside looking for you. I tried to send him away, but he was very persistent and swore that you would know him and want to speak with him."

"What?" Raven felt her heart fall into her stomach. Could it have been Red X? And if it was, how did he manage to find her? A mixture of panic and excitement rushed through her, and she blushed under Alfred's inquisitive stare.

"A young name by the name of Xavier?"

Raven snorted. She be damned if _that_ his name. "Oh… is he still there?"

"He is waiting in the western drive." Alfred cocked his head to the side, staring intently at Raven. "If you want, I can still send him away?"

"No, but thank you, Alfred." Raven shook her head. No matter what Alfred did, Red X wouldn't leave until he'd talked to Raven. Undoubtedly it was to discuss terms of payment. "I appreciate the offer, however I think I'm going to go talk to him and see what he wants and if I can get him to leave."

"Ah…" Alfred started to turn away, but paused before he left the room. "Be delicate with Master Grayson's heart, Raven… it breaks easily. We are all witnesses to that." With those words, he disappeared down the hall, leaving Raven to soak up the warning.

She felt color fill her face at his words. This had nothing to do with any kind of _feelings_, Red X was a Grade A nuisance. She just wanted to finish up the last bit of business and be done with him _forever_. Raven swallowed the word painfully as she opened the main entry door. Forever was a hefty word, and the awkward bulk of it weighed heavy on her chest. Parts of her knew that this was good, this was the end of their business understanding and there would be no more collaborating with the enemy. But there were parts of her that mourned the loss. Red X had become some sort of friend or companion, and despite their awkward relationship, they were kind of close. Whatever that meant.

Raven closed the front door behind her, pausing to scan the crisp outline of freshly fallen snow. There were tire tracks from some expensive brand. She sighed and followed the trail down the western drive. In the distance she saw the sleek, dark lines of the Lamborghini. Red X leaned against the hood, staring into the clouds. He heard the crunch of snow and turned to face her, a small smirk appearing on his lips. Raven stopped walking toward him and shivered. What was wrong with her? It was just _Red X_.

"Morning, Sunshine. Happy to see me?"

Raven blinked and fought the smile appearing on her lips. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, that answers my question." He shrugged and pushed himself to a standing position. "I came to say good-bye. I didn't want to go off to my next job and have you worried sick over me."

Raven laughed and shook her head, starting to close the space between them. "When would I ever be worried sick over _you_? Sick _of_ you is another story though."

"The thought is nice." He took a small step towards her, but paused as if he wasn't sure what to do after that. The silence between them grew tangible, and Red X looked away, unable to face her. Raven could sense he was hunting for a topic to discus, _anything_ at this point would have been better than silence. Like maybe why he came looking for her. He apparently chose something else. "So, how're the powers coming along? Any more show up while I was gone?"

"A few. Still can't fly, but I can manage to levitate a few small objects, and a little bit of my telekinesis is returning. I'm assuming that with a little more time and training, the rest will show." Raven shrugged and walked to stand next to him. She leaned against the hood and watched as he moved restlessly around her.

"Good… Good…" He kicked at some snow on his tire, still unable to look at her. "And Lover Boy? Is he still creepy and awkward?"

Raven shook her head, fighting a smile. "He's _fine_. And making amends with most of our friends, which is good… I guess. Things are working out just fine for both of us." She paused and watched him circle around the car a few more times. "Red X…" Raven stopped talking as he looked up at her, eyes dark with something unnamed deep inside him. He stared at her, never blinking, hands shaking, as if possessed with some kind of demon. Raven swallowed her fear and continued. "Red X, why _did_ you come here? Just to say good bye? Just to check up on me?"

"Most of that? All of that?" He shook his head and stood next to her. "I don't know."

Raven's eyebrows knitted together. That made no sense at all. "What are you talking about?"

"I think what I'm trying to say is that… well…" Red X leaned back against his hood and stared into the sky again. Raven watched as his eyes closed, taking in the sensations of an early winter morning. "I'm going to miss you."

"I'm sorry, did you say you were going to _miss_ me?" She snorted again, fighting off the mixture of absurdity and beginnings of panic that were starting to flirt with the edge of her mind. What was he trying to _say_ to her? That somehow, after all the chaos and destruction she caused in his life, she was still… _something _to him? That there was some kind of emotional bond growing between them. Raven didn't even know how to process that information, let alone handle it.

"Hey." Red X chuckled and shrugged, as if he were desperately trying to make light of this situation. "I've spend the last few days with you, not to mention all that time holding your sickly hand. I don't think it's entirely crazy to miss you. You're like a staple in my life." He nudged her shoulder a little. "Besides… I've become rather fond of you."

"Rather fond?" Raven laughed. Cold, morning wind whipped through her thin pajamas and she rubbed her arms to keep warm, or to keep from facing Red X. He smiled and peeled off his jacket to place it on her shoulders. Raven looked over at him, giving him an awkward smile. "That's an interesting term to describe us."

"That is definitely true." Red X laughed with her for a few moments before the thick quiet of winter swallowed the humor, refusing to give it back. Raven looked over at him, but he didn't meet her eyes, continuing to stare at the clouds. Minutes passed just like this, before Red X managed to speak again. "I am serious though… I'm going to miss you, Raven."

Those words bit at her, and Raven could barely breathe under the pressure. "Why? Why miss _me_?" Her voice barely came out as a whisper.

"Do you need to ask?" He finally looked at her, and his eyes were the darkest she'd ever seen them. Raven pulled away a few inches, stunned by the severity in them. He shook his head and snorted angrily. "Do you really need me to spell it out for you?"

"I…" Raven was fighting the urge to throw up, her whole body was going haywire at this point. Her heart pounded at her ribs, her limbs shook, and her skin felt like it was on fire… what was he _doing_ to her? Was he telling her he _loved_ her? Red X? The bane of her existence and of Robin's existence? Was he _really_ telling her this? Raven rubbed her arms, but she still could not look away. "Why?"

"_Why_?" Red X shook his head, barking out an angry shred of laughter. "Of all the things you had to ask, _why_ was it? The one question I don't have an answer for."

"Well, what am I supposed to ask? How? Because that doesn't answer anything either." Raven felt anger rise into her throat and it nearly choked her. He was upset because she didn't understand why he loved her. Of course she didn't understand! They had always been separated by a thick line of good and evil, and that was how it was supposed to stay. Friendship, even camaraderie, was never an option. Let alone _love._ "How am I supposed to feel when you tell me something like that? We are on opposite sides of the law, and my job is to bring justice to you."

"You could have at any time, but you didn't." Red X's eyes narrowed as he stared at her. "Instead you let things play out as they did. I should be asking _you_ why? Why lead me on like that?"

"I didn't lead you on! We had a business understanding, and you knew that as well."

"Well, you have a funny way of executing a business understanding." Red X stared at her, eyes narrowed. "The kiss we shared was just a mistake then, nothing else?"

"I was high on morphine and losing blood. My decision making skills were not exactly up-to-par." Raven felt her body shake with the urge to punch him. He knew exactly what he was doing to her, he was making her upset on _purpose_ because then she would have to admit something she didn't want to. That maybe Red X was more than a business partner, maybe even more than a friend. Raven took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to calm herself. "Besides, I thought you wanted this to go back to what it was before. Black and white, no changes."

"Maybe I lied." Red X shrugged and turned away from her, as a child would to sulk in the corner of a room. "Maybe I said that to make things less uncomfortable between us."

"Oh for the… I'm going to murder you." Raven ran a hand through her hair and groaned. He was doing this to her on purpose, _trying _to dig at her in any way he could. "What is the point of trying to fight with you? You're not even going to listen to anything I say!"

"Why should I? You aren't listening to me." Red X faced her, still frowning.

"Well, I don't even know what you're trying to tell me!"

"That I love you!" Red X threw his hands up in the air and took a few steps away from her. "There, are you _happy_ now? I had to spell the whole thing out for you, just so you can break my heart and tell me that there's nothing that can change between us because I'm Red X and you're… _this_." He motioned to her with his hand, shaking his head. "A _Titan_."

"I…" Raven was at a loss for words. What _could_ she say? 'I'm sorry' wasn't exactly the best response when someone said they loved you. Neither was 'thank you.' Raven felt her heart fall into her stomach as she tried to collect all her thoughts together. And there, and the forefront of it all, was the question she feared the most: Did she love him? Could she love him back? She wasn't sure about anything anymore. "I don't know what to say."

"Well, that's new." Red X shook his head and laughed, but it sounded like a broken bell, sad and forlorn. "Look, I don't want sympathy or anything I'm sure you're going to offer. I just wanted you to know. Not that it does me any good or anything… but… whatever."

"I… I'm sorry." Raven let her head hang. "I can't return the sentiment. I've got-"

"Too much at stake." Red X snorted. "Yeah… I _know_. You keep making that a point."

"Then why come out here? Just to hear me tell you I can't love you?" Raven tried not to let her anger get the best of her, but he was making it hard.

"To collect part of my payment." Red X took a step towards her, pinning her knees against the front bumper of his car. Was he implying…

"You don't get to make up your own form of payment." In spite of herself, Raven felt excitement jump into her throat and race through her body. Red X took another step closer, so that their heats mingled and mixed. The scent of black licorice filled her nose and she tried to move away, but he had her trapped. "That's not how this works."

"Yeah? Well, you didn't offer me payment, so I'm making this up as I go along." Red X took one more step forward, letting his arms wrap around her waist. Raven fought against her reaction to sigh, and Red X seemed to notice. He gave her a weak, broken smile. "And I don't see you objecting yet."

"I… that's not the point." Raven felt color flood her face as his hands slid up the back of her shirt, his fingertips barely touching her skin. She bit back a moan and fought the urge to rub her body against his own. "This isn't right."

"I beg to differ. I think this is very right…" Red X smirked and leaned forward, placing his lips on her throat. His tongue slid against her pulse and Raven felt her body melt into a puddle of heat. He slid his hands to the front of her body, smoothing along the soft skin of her stomach. He gave a slight push, and Raven tumbled back against the hood of his Lamborghini. The engine still pulsed heat under her back, making her aware of every sensation that was happening to her.

Red X leaned forward more, his lips moving slowly across her jaw line. He stopped at her ear, nipping at the lobe gently. Raven moaned, her back arching into his body. His hands slid down her body, grabbing at the edge of her shirt and pushing it up just enough to expose her stomach. His fingers danced across her skin, finding every spot that seemed to make Raven melt. She squirmed against his body, trying to escape and get closer at the same time. He smirked and slid his hands under her shirt, tracing the voluptuous shape of her breasts.

Raven tried to moan, but Red X stole the sound with a kiss. And oh did he kiss. His lips moved softly across hers, as if to coax a passionate response out of her. The effect it actually had, was waken Raven's sensibility. The kiss instead made her very aware of what she was missing, of who was sleeping just a few hundred yards away from her. She had fought for _him_, had done everything in her power to _save him_. Just as he had done for her, and here she was, making out with Red X as if nothing had happened. She really was a terrible person.

"Stop, X. Stop." Raven pressed her hands against his chest and pushed. The cold air rushed between them, as if a giant void had been opened up. Raven shivered as she stared into his face, dark with a torrential mixture of anger and passion. He knew what was wrong, and yet he still wanted to try and build the connection between them.

His lips pressed into a thin line. "Tell me you don't want this and I'll stop. Tell me, with every sincerity that this means nothing to you and I will go away and never look back. Tell me _honestly_ that you don't love me."

Raven cringed under the weight of his words and she turned her head away from him, nearly choking on her own emotions. "I don't want this."

"You're lying."

"I am." Raven's eyes bore into him, and he growled low in his throat. "I can't tell you that this means nothing honestly, because we have a connection… but I _can't _do this." Raven felt him move off her and stand up. She readjusted her clothing, watching as he did the same. Silence grew between them again and Raven sighed. "Aren't you going to ask me why?"

"I don't see how it matters." Red X glared at her, and the anger in his eyes felt like a hot knife in her heart. Raven took a step away from him, feeling the distance grow wider. "Besides… I know you've got your thing for the amazing boy wonder." Red X snorted and yanked open the door to his car. "I hope you have a nice life together."

Raven reached out to stop him, but she didn't know why. "Red X… I…"

"You _what_, Raven? You're sorry? Sympathetic? Just let it go!" He snarled at her and Raven put even more space between them. She had never seen him so angry before, and the sight frightened her. "You are not in love with me, and that's _fine_. I know I can't be what you need me to be. I can't _be_ Robin, or Nightwing, or douchebag… whatever he calls himself." Red X shook his head and sighed. "I know I can't be that… but I thought maybe… maybe you could be like me."

Raven shook her head, feeling pain rip through her throat. "I can't, Red X… I can't. This…" she motioned to the world around her. "This is what I've always wanted to be. Good. It's something not usually associated with my kind."

"Yeah." Red X snorted and slid into his leather seats. "I know."

"I really am sorry, X…" Raven watched as he stared at her.

"Me too." And the door slammed shut.

)O(

_I really wish I knew what to say. It's almost over. Whew. There'll be an epilogue, but the final pairings will remain the same. Robin and Raven. I am toying __with the idea of a one-shot with Raven and Red X, we'll see. I did want to send out a huge "THANK YOU" to _Atramentous Love _for her dissertation on why Robin should end up with Raven. Her arguments made perfect sense and made me realize why I started this story in the first place. Thank you so much, and please leave a review. _


	14. Epilogue

**Wide Awake  
**Epilogue

"You say I hide in my dreams  
So, I tell myself don't sleep, don't sleep."  
- _Wide Awake_, Kenna

)O(

"I did this."

Raven jumped and turned to look at Robin, his eyes not quite meeting hers. The tower was so quiet and still, that she had nearly forgotten she wasn't alone. Neither of them had the courage to contact Cyborg or Beast Boy, who were undoubtedly still scouring the city for signs of either of them. Robin picked his head up and looked past her, into her room. It was still in the same disarray as when she had left a week and a half ago. Chairs were overturned, covers ripped from the bed, papers littered the floor, and everything had a fine veil of dust, like old photographs in an empty corner of a deserted attic.

"You did this?" Raven blinked and held a hand to her chest, trying to keep her lungs from hurting. She had always known that Robin had a temper, Slade was case and point. But never in her time on earth had she ever seen that temper directed at one of the team's members. To see and feel the anger he left here made her realize just how close to the edge of darkness he had really been. Raven swallowed and took a cautious step into the room, feeling him follow her over the threshold.

She struggled for normalcy in all of this. Everyone's lives had been uprooted. Hers, Beast Boy's and Cyborg's, Starfire had simply left, and even Red X's life had been turned on its end. But Robin had taken the hardest hit. He didn't know how to handle this particular tragedy and instead of relying on his friends, he let the darkness speak for him. Raven watched as he righted furniture and organized papers, all the while avoiding her eyes. It was like he was searching for some kind of reconciliation, as if he was trying to erase the mistakes he made by returning the world to normal. By making the paper white again.

"I don't blame you…" Raven reached out and stilled his hand, feeling his muscles flinch under her touch. He turned toward her, but refused to pick his eyes up from the floor. Raven sighed and took a step back, giving him space. "What happened to me was going to happen regardless of the situation, there was nothing you could have done to prevent it and nothing you could have done to stop it." She moved to sit on her bed, a puff of dust rising as her weight settled. She watched Robin move to sit next to her, eyes curious.

"If you don't mind me asking… what _did_ happen?"

Raven felt color rise to her face and she was forced to look away. Why did everyone have to ask her that? It was so embarrassing to admit to her peculiar, biological issues. She took a shaky breath and managed to look Robin in his eyes. That was a feat all by its self. "I… it's hard to say what it was… and even harder to explain _why_ it was."

"Well…" Robin placed a hand on her knee and the warmth spread through her leg until it pooled in the pit of her stomach. He was offering her peace of mind, someone to open up to… someone who didn't judge her because he had his own past. There was something calming about that thought. "I understand… things are always private with you and if you can't share, then you can't share… I don't want you to feel guilty for something that isn't your fault, Raven."

"I was coming of age." Raven, if possible, felt her face grow redder and she looked away. She heard Robin's sharp intake of breath, then felt his fingers press harder into her knee. Heavy, uncomfortable silence weaved between them until Raven spoke again. "I was being tested by my heritage to make sure that I was a viable candidate to be a demon adult." She barked out a shred of humorless laughter. "I must have passed."

"What would have happened if you didn't pass your test?" Robin's hands were now in his lap, and Raven stared at them, desperately wanting to hold his hand. No matter the darkness he had encountered, or the things she had to do to get him back, he still managed to calm her. He kept everything at bay, all the crazy emotions that swarmed her like a plague, all her fears and concerns, even the nightmares. Things simply _fit_ when he was around, and Raven was just barely beginning to understand the desolation he must have felt when she was trapped in her own mind.

She shrugged and stood up, moving through the room. "I wouldn't have woken up, simple as that."

"Was there anything I… _we_ could have done to help you?" Robin stood and moved behind her, following her through the debris in the room.

"No." Raven turned and faced him, watching the heavy guilt spread across his face as he pieced the puzzle together. She cringed and looked away, wishing he hadn't figured it out. She never meant for him to realize that particular piece of information, but Robin was a detective. He would have figured it out anyway.

"You needed me by your side when you woke up… didn't you? You needed me to be there for you." He shook his head and tugged at his hair, growling at himself. Raven took a step toward him, but he recoiled in anger and she was forced to put more space between them. "And I couldn't even do _that_. No, I had to run away out of my own stupidity. I had to start this whole debacle and force you to come look for me because I'm just _that stupid_. Some friend I am."

"Robin… it's not your fault." Raven closed the space between them and grabbed his hand, squeezing tightly. "That darkness you feel when I'm not around? I… feel it too." She lifted his hand and placed it above her heart, looking into his eyes. "That's why I was tested, because I had a weakness."

Robin swallowed and moved closer to her. "And that was?"

"You." She lifted her hand and pushed his hair from his eyes, watching the emotions cross his face. "There was nothing you could have done to stop what happened to me."

"Maybe so… but I shouldn't have abandoned you."

Raven took another step forward so that their bodies barely touched. "But you're here for me now, and that's all I need." Raven let her eyes close and she leaned up to face him. There was a moment's hesitation, and then everything seemed to fall into place with one kiss. He let his hands wander over her body, pulling her closer, memorizing the shape of her. Raven sighed in content, and let him hold her close. _This_ was worth it. The angry, the sadness, teaming up with a cocky thief… it was all worth it just to be here with Robin, knowing that everything was going to be okay.

He pulled away and pressed chaste kisses to her face. "But what are we going to do about the others?"

Raven chuckled and smiled up at him. "We'll figure it out… we're friends."

"Thanks…" Robin pulled her close and whispered into her hair. Raven leaned into his warmth and closed her eyes, savoring the feelings he offered her. "For everything."

"Just don't do it again… or I might actually kill you myself."

"Scary thought."

)O(

Red X didn't know what made him sit there and watch them. He liked to think it was just some form of sick, self-deprecating curiosity. In all honesty, he shouldn't have cared, he got most of what he wanted from his last excursion, the rest of the world be damned… But watching the two of them together made something in Red X twist. It was like he was watching an unavoidable car crash and he couldn't turn away. Glass shattered and metal twisted into unintelligible heaps, but the sight was so frightening that he just wanted to sit and stare.

Not that it did him any good, she had already made her decision... although she would have made an excellent thief. Their excursion together was case and point. He sighed and returned to the world he knew, the world of crime, women… and that aching emptiness Raven had left him with. It was a terrible thing he had no idea on how to be the hero, but maybe someday he could pretend.

)O(

_Thank you for everyone who has played a part in this, friends, readers, and XSilvaStarX for letting me borrow her bones. I couldn't do it without any of you._

_There is a possible alternate-ending/one-shot planned. So, for any of you rooting for "the other team" don't give up hope yet, there's another, sexy story formulating in my mind already. _

_Please, leave a review! I love to hear what everyone thinks! _


	15. OneShot Preview Show Me Love

**Show Me Love**  
Preview

_A preview of the Red X/Raven one-shot I promised!_

Three weeks.

Red X had been a hero for three weeks and he thought his stomach might shrivel up and die from the weight of the morals. Jewels glittered in museum cases, beautiful women whistled and called out to him, companies called for his services. Everything was a temptation, dangling in his face, taunting him.

…

Somewhere in the distance he heard an alarm go off. Sighing, Red X pulled a mask from his pocket and shed his leather jacket for a Kevlar suit. He could do this, it was just a burglary. Not even a heist. Taking off down the back streets and alleyways, he ran into the ornate façade of Harrods, alarm screeching painfully. Glass littered the sidewalk, glittering in the pale, dingy lights. A necklace had been stolen. Red X sighed and pulled off his mask. He decided to leave it for the Bobbies, they'd take care… of…

Red X's thoughts trailed off as he saw something on the display mannequin. A small slip of paper, with ornate, even handwriting. "Horribly Obvious Clue" was written on it, staring back at Red X like lettering on a tombstone.

_"I should have known this wasn't going to work."_

_ "It was worth a try anyway." Red X, as if sensing her emotions, reached over and grabbed her hand.__"So, should we try Plan B?"_

_ Raven snorted and looked back at him. "Do we even have a Plan B?"_

_ "Well, we can start to become serial thieves… you know, leave horribly obvious clues everywhere we go…__I'm just saying, Sunshine, it could be an option if nothing else comes up."_

_ "Are you asking me to stoop to your level?" Raven stared up at him, raising an eyebrow. _

_ Red X cocked his head to the side and put a hand on his chest, faking pain. "Stoop? I'm hurt you call it that. I'd call it more like… bowing down to my level."_

Red X shook his head and took a step back, pocketing the slip of paper. He hadn't thought about that night in months. The night that Raven had proven herself a rather skilled thief. The night that he began to question whether or not she could live on his side of the law, and he on hers.

…

"Are we playing a game, Raven?"

"I don't know, Red X… do you want the necklace returned?"

"Right now, I don't give a damn."

"Then why don't you come here… and we can… talk."

Red X grunted. "Talking is not exactly what I had in mind."

"Then, come here and we can… kiss?"

His body hardened again. "Kissing… you're getting warmer…"

…

Red X finally leaned over and kissed her neck. She let loose a breathy moan and tilted her head back. "And how are you enjoying playing the thief?"

"It's new." Raven turned and looked at him, still smirking. "And how are you enjoying playing the hero?"

"It's no fun."

_Look for it soon! It's almost done!_


End file.
